Remember Me
by LaceyLouLou82
Summary: Eddie can't remember the time that he spent with her before his near fatal accident but he feels this undeniable connection to the daughter of his father's girlfriend. As Eddie works through his recovery he discovers that nothing that he thought was true is actually true and the one person that he can't remember is the only one he desperately wants to.
1. Prologue

**Title- Second Chances**

**Summary:** A Hollywood Heights fan fiction. This story is about getting a second chance at a love you never thought was possible to even have the first place.

**Authors Notes: ****I pretty much have this whole story outlined, though I am sure that I will make some changes along the way. Updates will most likely be once a week as I have limited internet access due to the fact that I practically live in the middle of nowhere and high speed internet is not available in my area, which means that I have dial-up and it's a complete nightmare. Instead of getting frustrated with the amount of time it takes to upload things through dial up, I will be taking my trusty flash drive with me on my son's weekly library trips and borrowing their high speed internet. I hope you guys like this story. I usually write Soap Opera couples (General Hospital) fan fiction but teen soaps (i.e. Pretty Little Liars, The Lying Game, Veronica Mars, One Tree Hill) are quickly becoming my guilty pleasure. I'm not a professional writer by any means so chances are good that this will be the worst story you have ever read. However, I am a 20 something stay at home mom to a newborn, a toddler and a kindergartener, and getting lost in the world of fan fiction make believe has kept me from losing my mind Again, I hope you like it, but even if you don't let me know. **

**PROLOUGE**

"Loren" my mother's soft voice brought me out of my light sleep. I opened my bleary eyes and smiled up at her and Max. They both returned my smile, but I could tell by the look in their eyes that the news wasn't good. I pushed myself up into a sitting position on my bed so that they could both sit down and they did. Max on one side and mom on the other. I couldn't help the small smile that graced my lips. It was a family moment and to say I felt blessed at that moment wasn't an understatement . Max Duran had moved into our house nearly six months ago and my mom was the happiest I've ever seen her. I was happy about it as well. I loved Max. He loved me too. I felt it in the way he talked to me, the way he gave me advice...everything the former Rock Star did showed me that not only did he understand that my mom and I were a package deal but that he wouldn't have it any other way. We were a family, even if that did mean that someday it was very possible that my boyfriend would be my step-brother. Speaking of my boyfriend..." How's Eddie?" I creaked out in my sleepy voice. I saw mom and Max exchange a look and it made me uneasy.

Max took my hand in his. He stroked it gently. It was the same way I'd watched him stroke Eddie's hand almost every day over the last six months. My uneasiness grew. "What's going on you guys?"

"Eddie's awake," my mother said gently. I didn't pay attention to the tone she used to tell me the news I had been waiting all these months to hear.

"He's awake?!" I jumped off my bed and headed for my closet ready to get dressed and get my butt down to the hospital. I couldn't believe it. Eddie was awake. Finally after months of being in a coma, he was finally awake! Forget being a singer, this had been my dream for so many months now. I pulled a pair of jeans out of my closet and pulled them on over the boxer shorts that I always wear to bed. I grabbed a t-shirt as well but before I could put it over my head my mom pulled it out of my hands. For the first time, I noticed the sadness in her eyes. "Mom, what's going on. " She took me by the hand and led me back over to my bed. Mom and Max exchanged another look and I knew that something was terribly wrong. "Just tell me, "I begged. "Eddie is awake, but he has amnesia. " Max told me as gently as he could. Amnesia….like in the movies? "What do you mean, like, he can't remember the accident?" Max shook his head, "not just the accident, Loren, he can't remember anything that happened in the last six months." This could not be happening. "He doesn't remember me?" Max shook his head. "The last thing he remembers is being on tour. He remembers the concert at the Avalon but nothing after that. He didn't even remember meeting Nora. I started to explain things to him ,but the doctors said that we can't bombard him with information because it will confuse him and it could prevent him from remembering things on his own. We have to let the memories come back in their own time so for now, we just have to follow Eddie's lead." I didn't even bother to wipe away the tears that fell from my eyes. He had a head injury that much had been clear the night that we had gotten the call that Eddie's body had been found in the parking lot of an Ojai gas station after someone had stolen his car. The carjacker had beaten Eddie up pretty badly and I will never forget that vision of his bloody and beaten body. We thought for the second time in a week that he was dead but then mom had found his pulse, it was weak, but it was there.

We had taken him to the hospital and less than an hour later; the doctor had informed us that Eddie was in a coma .By then word had quickly spread that Eddie was alive and the waiting room was filled with people that loved Eddie. My mom, Max and I were there obviously. Mel and Adam had shown up and surprisingly Phil and Adrianna had come as well. Jake, his wife Tracey and Kelly were there and Chloe, who had just earlier that day been released from the very hospital we were gathered in, had also shown up. Her presence should have annoyed me but for the first time since I have known her I didn't mind her being around. She had cleared the matter of who pushed her off of Max's balcony up and Dylan Boyd was already in jail and the charges against Eddie had been dropped. I actually found myself being grateful to Eddie's ex-fiancée. All I have wanted since then if for him to wake up and for him to be okay. I guess my prayers have been answered. Maybe I should have been a little more specific in my nightly conversations with God.

As I sat there between my mom and Max with tears streaming down my cheeks, I felt my heart break into a million little jaggy pieces. I heard my mom tell me that everything would be ok. I heard Max tell me that Eddie loved me even if he couldn't remember it. He swore that the doctors said it was entirely possible that Eddies amnesia was just a temporarily condition. I knew he believed that was the case, but I didn't. I knew exactly what this was. It was what I had been waiting for all this time. From the moment I won the songwriting contest, I knew it would happen. With every kiss that Eddie and I shared, it was always in the back of my mind. I was after all, Loren Tate. Good things didn't just happen to me. Eddie's accident, his amnesia, it was the other shoe finally dropping. Nothing in my life would ever be the same again.


	2. Chapter 1

**A/N: ****So, I am not completely happy with the way this chapter turned out but it gets to where I need to be for the next chapter. And for those of you that catch the Veronica Mars stuff…no worries….this is not a crossover fic. I just happened to be watching VM on Soap Net and my LoVe addiction came out a little **** PLEASE READ AND REVIEW**

_**Five Months Later**_ `

Once upon a time I was Eddie Duran, the rock star, now I'm just Eddie Duran, the mean, resentful, angry invalid. Just ask Nora, after all I did just bite her head off. Again. It wasn't that I didn't appreciate all the things that my dad and Nora have done for me since I was released from the hospital five months ago, it's just that sometimes i resented the fact that I had to rely on them so much. I knew it wasn't their fault that some punk destroyed my life. It wasn't their fault that I couldn't get around on my own because of my busted up back and It certainly wasn't their fault that my record label decided that I was "un-promotable", which is why I am currently in such a bad mood. It wasn't even their fault that I haven't been able to write a single song in five months. Nothing was their fault but that didn't stop me from constantly being angry about the fact that I had to live with them. I hated having to rely on people. Especially my father and the woman he loved.

"I'm sorry, "I told Nora as she gathered my lunch dishes. What the hell was wrong with me? I had just yelled at her about a freaking sandwich. So what if she had used the spicy mustard my dad likes rather than the regular mustard I like. I had taken my bad mood out on her and it wasn't fair. She shook her head at my apology just like she always did and that wasn't fair either. "Jake told me the label is fed up with me and I'm not handing it very well, "I told her. She stopped clearing the table and pulled out the chair next to me. She sat down and looked at me with those soft brown eyes of hers. "You are entitled to your anger Eddie; you don't have to apologize for it. Your father and I understand. "She reached out and took my hand in hers, "I think I would be just as angry as you are if I was stuck in that chair." My wheelchair, my worst nightmare, was state of the art of course….only the best for Eddie Duran. Still, even with all the fancy controls, I hated the damn thing. It made me feel weak. I hated feeling weak. "But I think you are letting the fact that you need that chair control your life, "Nora continued breaking into my angry thoughts.

"What do you mean? "My voice was laced with anger just like it always was these days but to her credit, my father's 'girlfriend ignored it. I prepared myself for an argument, though deep down I knew that whatever Nora had to say would probably make sense. I learned very quickly that my father's girlfriend was one of the smartest women I had ever met, not to mention feisty as hell. She gave as well as she got when it came to me. Nora Tate was wise and smart, and way too good to be stuck with me just because she fell in love with my father.

"You don't leave the house unless you are going to Jakes office, you don't do interviews, you don't go to the studio, when was the last time you went to Rumor? That was your favorite place, right? You haven't even been to MK. "

I shrugged my shoulders in response. She was right. She knew it, I knew it.

"Eddie, I hate what happened to you, we all do, but we all love you and it kills us to see you so unhappy. Just because your back doesn't work right now doesn't mean that it never will again. Your physical therapist told your father that your back muscles are getting stronger every day. She has every reason to believe that you will get out of that chair someday, maybe soon, and it would be a shame if when you did, you didn't have a career or friends to share it with." I snorted at her implication that I actually had friends.

Nora rolled her eyes, "You know very well that Mel and Adam and the others come by here every day to see how you are doing. You are the one that turns them away. "

I sighed because she was right but I just couldn't deal with the looks of pity on their faces or the fact that I couldn't remember even meeting them. Before my accident my life revolved around Jake, Chloe, my dad and Ian when he was around. All of a sudden I wake up from a coma and have all these people in my life that I don't know the first thing about. Melissa, Adam, Adrianna, and Phil were younger than me but pushy as hell because never once did the stay away from me when I asked them too. I guess the truth was I didn't really mind them. It was kind of nice to have people that actually wanted to be around me even without all the glory of the stage and touring. Phil and Adam were pretty cool, actually. And they never took pity on me and let me when a single video game when we played. Adrianna was always keeping me up to date on all the latest Hollywood news and Mel was well….Mel was unique.

Nora pushed a lock of her brown hair behind her ears, "People care about you young man, whether you want us to or not, we do. And we all know that one day you are going to be up on a stage singing and dancing around like a fool again. Even if you don't believe it, the rest of us do and we can believe enough for you if we have to. Now, I am hosting a baby shower here for Adrianna this afternoon. This place is going to be full of young girls talking all things baby. "I cringed and Nora laughed, "That's what I thought so since your dad is working, Phil and Adam are taking you out. " I started to argue but she held up her hand to stop me, "no arguments. You are going and you're going to have fun. Phil is a nervous wreck about being a father so I expect you to show him a good time and take his mind off things. Stop feeling sorry for yourself and help your friend forget that in a few weeks his life is going to revolve around dirty diapers and 2am feedings." With that she stood up and cleared our lunch dishes from the table. Conversation over, I shook my head, I guess she told me.

I used the control pad on my wheelchair to back away from the table. I started to move down the hallway towards my room when a picture on the wall stopped me. "Is your daughter coming to the shower?" I saw Nora's hand still for a quick second just as it always does when I mention Loren, before she turned to me, "Yes, she will be here, but right after the shower she has to leave again. " Of course she does, I thought as I took one last look at the photo and continued towards my room. Loren was always too busy for me.

I didn't really even know Nora's daughter that well. I knew she won a contest that Jake had put together and that she and I worked together. Winning the contest launched her career, apparently. I had met her a couple of times, only brief enough for her to say hi and then disappear. It didn't make any sense. My father told me that Loren and I got along great before my accident, but now she barely spoke to me. For a while I thought maybe it was my wheelchair but everyone assured me that wasn't the case at all. I believed them but it didn't make sense that Loren never wanted anything to do with me. I had seen enough of her interviews to know that she was grateful for winning my contest and appreciative of all the help I have given her. So why didn't she ever want to be in the same room as me?

"Lo, hurry up or you'll be late for Adrianna's shower, "I heard my roommate call from across the diner. We had stopped at the place for a quick bite before we headed to my mom's place in the valley but somewhere between paying the check and getting out the door, a group of teenage girl had seen right through my baseball cap and dark sunglasses disguise. Of course I couldn't be mad. I loved meeting my fans. Especially considering that without them my life wouldn't be as awesome as it was and all my dreams wouldn't be coming true. I posed for pictures and signed my name on napkins. One girl started talking about how my new single was helping her get over a bad breakup and I found myself getting drawn into her tale of loving her ex way more than he loved her. I couldn't help myself. I loved hearing how my fans related to my music; it was the best feeling to know that my words touched someone so much. It wasn't that long ago when I was listening to someone else's music to drown out my troubles. I thanked the group of friends for all their support and promised to follow them on twitter like they asked as I followed Veronica out to her car. She shook her head as I climbed in the passenger seat and she took her place behind the wheel, "told you that disguise wouldn't work." I rolled my eyes as I fastened my seatbelt and pulled my cell phone from my back pocket. I smiled at the text message my mom sent telling me that Eddie would be out of the house for the evening so it's safe to come home.

Veronica shook her head at me again. She knew what the message would be. Same as always, I asked my mom to make sure I wouldn't run into Eddie while I was in town. I didn't mind going home but the fact that Eddie lived with my mom and Max made things difficult. I knew that V thought I was being a coward, she had told me as much many times as had my mom and Melissa. Hell even Adrianna told me I was being a coward.

"I take it the coast is clear," V asked as she pulled out of the parking lot and merged her car into traffic. I nodded and once again she shook her head at me. In the four months that we've been living together, V had come to know me almost as well as Melissa and it hurt me to know that she was disappointed in my refusal to just see Eddie. But she didn't understand, not really, no one did. "Mom is sending Eddie out with Phil and Adam while the shower is going on. "

Again Veronica shook her head, her blonde hair brushing the top of her shoulders as she did so. She reached in front of me to pull her sunglasses out of the glove compartment and slide them on her face. "One of these days, your mom is going to stop making the coast clear, Lo. You are going to have to face him eventually."

"I have faced him, "I defended.

"No you have not. You never let yourself be in the same room with him for more than five minutes. Every time you get within talking distance to him you make an excuse to bail."

She was right of course. I was fine seeing Eddie in a crowd but not face to face. I just couldn't handle it. He still couldn't remember anything about our relationship. As far as he knew, Loren Tate was his father's girlfriend's daughter, who happened to win his song writing contest. He knew that his dad met my mom through me. That's it. Max wanted to go against the doctors' orders a couple months ago and just tell Eddie the truth but I wouldn't let him. Eddie had enough to worry about without adding a girlfriend he couldn't remember to the mix. "Veronica…." Before I could finish, the blonde held up her hand to stop me.

"I get it Loren. I really do. It's not like I'm making a beeline to Logan as soon as we drive into LA."

I nodded. Okay so maybe Veronica did get it. She had her very own Eddie. His name was Logan Echoless and he had broken my friend's heart. I didn't even know the guy but I hated him. She ran from him like I ran from Eddie. Maybe that was why we got along so well….we were both cowards when it came to the two men in this world who had the power to destroy us. "Is he still in town? Didn't you say that he was moving away from California?"

V nodded, "He was supposed to but then his mom turned up alive after all. My dad said he is still living in Neptune. Which is exactly why you and I are both staying at Mel's until we find a place. Have you told Nora that we are moving back?"

I shook my head. Truth was that I was having second thoughts. As much as I wanted to move back to LA, I didn't want to constantly be reminded of Eddie and I knew that I would be. It was the reason I had moved to San Diego in the first place. It was far away from Eddie and my memories of him and I had been happy there for the last few months. I'd met Veronica there so I would always be grateful for that but it wasn't home. I missed my mom and Max and all my friends. I even missed Kelly and her overbearing attitude. I needed to be home but I wasn't sure if I could handle it. "I will tell her after the shower. Mel knows so I am surprised that she wasn't blabbed it all over town." Veronica laughed good-naturedly. She loved Melissa just as much as I did. They had been introduced three months ago when I brought V along with me to Phil and Adrianna's wedding. Of course my two best friends got along from the second that they met. Even Adrianna got along with V. It still surprised me that Aid and I were getting along so to say that I was impressed with her acceptance of Veronica is an understatement.

"I think we need to make a pact."

"What kind of pact? "I wrinkled my forehead in confusion and looked over at my friend whose blue eyes were focused on the road ahead of us.

"We both need closure, Loren. We will not ever be able to move on if we don't have it. I know that I don't believe in happily ever after or any of that crap but I do want to eventually give all of myself to a new relationship. I won't be able to do that until I face Logan and deal with the fact that he slept with Madison Sinclair and beat the daylight out of Piz. You need to move on from Eddie and you will never do that if you don't deal with your past with him."

I shook my head, "My situation with Eddie is completely different than yours with Logan, V. "

"Maybe, but you still need to move on. You haven't gone on a single date the entire time I have known you."

"Says the girl who stays in a relationship just because there is no chance of getting hurt. "

Veronica shook her head, "That's not true. I like Piz."

"You've been dating him for over a year, V. You should have stopped liking him and started loving him a long time ago. You and I both know you are staying with Piz because you aren't in love with him and so he doesn't have the power to hurt you." Piz was a nice guy but he wasn't Veronica's guy. He knew it as well as she and I did. He just didn't seem to care. I guess as long as he got to be with the person he loved, it didn't matter to him that she would never love him back. For Veronica, whether she wanted to admit it or not, Logan would always be her happily ever after. Eddie would always be mine. I hated it for sure. I loved him then and I loved him now. Time and distance hadn't changed my feelings. But Eddie didn't love me back. I didn't even know if he loved me before the accident, Max swears that he did, but he never said the words and now he never would because he doesn't remember me. Probably never would.

"Ok so maybe I can't love Piz because things have never truly been settled between Logan and I. Maybe it's time for me to face the jerk, face to face, and let him finally explain his actions. Then maybe I can put my past with him in the past. "

"Do you really think that's possible?"

"No probably not but I'm willing to try. I am sick to death of missing him and wondering what could have been. "Her voice was sad, just like it always was when she talked about Logan. She had loved him so much but he had torn her to shreds when he slept with her high tormentor. Logan and Veronica had been on a break at the time but the fact that he could do it in the first place had broken Veronica. She tried to be his friend afterward but then Logan, misunderstanding a situation had beaten the crap out of Veronica's current boyfriend. That had been the last straw for the blonde. She ended their friendship and when she was offered an internship in San Diego she high-tailed it out of town.

I sighed. She had a point. I hated that about her, she always had a point.

"Look Lo, I know seeing Eddie hurts you, I get it, but not seeing him hurts you too, and you aren't going to be able to avoid him forever. Chances are your mom is going to marry his dad. That means endless family holidays and events. It's not fair to keep asking your mom to run interference. And technically, Eddie didn't do anything wrong. None of this is his fault. "

Of course she was right about that too. Eddie didn't ask to get car jacked and mugged. He didn't ask to nearly get beaten to death and be stuck in a wheelchair. He certainly didn't ask to have amnesia. "How am I supposed to get closure from a relationship he doesn't ever remember having?"

Veronica shrugged her shoulders, "I hadn't thought about that part. Your situation is way different than mine. Logan remembers every jackass thing he did to me. You kind of have a fine line to walk. Maybe you should just tell him the truth."

"No I can't do that. It could mess up his recovery."

Veronica sighed this time as she pulled onto my mom's street, "Then start by not running away every time you are in the same room with him. Talk to him. Have a conversation with the guy."

I could do that, couldn't I? "Ok. I'll try. "

Veronica smiled as she pulled into my driveway. We were home, finally. I glanced at the clock on the dashboard. 2:15pm. we were early. I told my mom we wouldn't be here until 4:00. I glared across the console at Veronica who was wearing a cheesy smile." I may have broken some speeding laws while we were talking."

"I hate you"

"You love me and you know it. Now is the perfect time, Lo. Eddie is probably still here. We are going to go in there and I am going to help your mom set up for the baby shower while you put your big girl panties on and face Eddie Duran."


	3. Chapter 2

Though I agreed with Veronica that talking to Eddie was something I had to do, I wasn't disappointed when we arrived at my mother's house and she informed me that we just missed Eddie and Phil who she sent to pick up some last minute things at the grocery store a few blocks down. It wasn't much of a reprieve but it was enough for now and I was grateful. V was right in her assessment of me needing closure but being in the same space as Eddie wasn't going to be easy. It never was. I spent so much time worrying and stressing every time something comes up to brings me back here. No matter what the reason, Adrianna and Phil's wedding, a visit to my mom or Mel, the reason doesn't matter, and my feelings are always the same. I am scared out of my mind to see Eddie.

You would think after all these months it would be easier. He's alive and while he might not be completely healthy, I had no doubt that he would be walking again in no time. But it still hurt as much as ever to be in the same room as him. To sit across the table, or even across the living room, from the man I loved more than I ever thought imaginable, and know that as far as he was concerned, I was just some girl he mentored, pretty much destroyed me. I know it's what's best. Eddie can't find out about our relationship because it could set his recovery back, but that doesn't mean that I have to think it's fair, because I don't. In fact, I think it's totally unfair.

"You ok, Lo?" My mom's voice interrupts my thoughts. I smile at her from across the dining room table where we have had so many conversations in my life time. Veronica had left to go visit her dad a few minutes after we got here and my mom and I are had gotten comfortable with a cup of coffee for her and a diet soda for me.

"I am ok ¸Mom. Just thinking." I didn't have to tell her what was on my mind. She knows better than anyone how I feel about Eddie and our current situation. I can't count the number of times she and Max have begged me to just let them tell Eddie the truth. I can't do it though. I can't be the cause of his life being turned upside down. "How many people are coming to the shower?"

"Not many, I think about ten. Adrianna doesn't have a lot of friends and I couldn't get ahold of her mom."

I couldn't even begin to imagine what it was like to be my one time nemesis. Her mom had bailed on her years ago. I knew what that was like in a sense, since my dad walked out too, but it had to be different for a girl to be without her mom. Actually, I knew it was. Veronica's mom wasn't in her life either and the two of us had spent many hours pigging out on mint chocolate chip ice cream and toasting the parent that had actually stayed and raised us. My mom for me and her dad for her. Veronica's dad was great. Completely involved and totally supportive. Adrianna's dad hadn't been either. Oh he'd stayed and taken care of Adrianna by buying her whatever she had wanted but he was too busy with his womanizing ways to tolerate more than five minutes with his daughter. Those same womanizing ways ended up taking the doctor's life. It was sad and it made me thankful every single day that I had been blessed with the best mom ever. "Well, I'm glad that V and I could make it. "

"So am I sweetie. I don't get to see you nearly enough."

"Yeah, about that. Veronica and I are thinking about extending this trip. "I watched a smile cross my mom's face and I knew without a doubt that my best friend was going to need a good shake. " Mel told you?"

My mom nodded her head excitedly. "She did! But don't be mad. She didn't want to but I kind of forced her. I can read Melissa just like I can read you, honey. You are both terrible at keeping secrets. "Her smile was contagious and I found myself smiling as well. We sat there just happy to be spending time together and knowing that it wouldn't just be for a limited amount of time. "However, Max and I talked about it and we really want you to stay here not at Mel's. "

The smile disappeared off my face and I looked down at my hands, "No. I already told Mel I would stay with her. She cleaned out her extra room and everything. "

"Veronica can stay at Mel's. You can stay here. This is your home Loren. "It wasn't often that my mom used a firm voice with me but she was doing it now.

"Mom…."

"Don't mom me. You can move back into your old room. We haven't changed a single thing since you left. "

Stay here, in this house, with Eddie across the wall…yeah that wasn't going to happen. "I appreciate that, mom, but Mel, V and I are really looking forward to being roommates. "

"You can be. Later. Right now, you need to be here. I need you to be here. "Well damn. There was the trump card my mom rarely ever used. She needed me to do something for her and she knew I would never turn my back on those words.

I let out an aggravated breath and shook my head, "does it matter at all that dinner conversation is going to be incredibly awkward?"

"No, because it won't be. Eddie doesn't know what the two of you meant to one another, Loren. All he knows is that he helped you get your recording contract and that you two are friends. No one has told him any different. Everything he know he read about in the media. You two never announced you were a couple so everything they have is based off rumors. Same with Chloe. No one except us knows what really happened between her and Eddie "

Which is exactly why it was so easy for Eddie to take the model back after his release from the hospital, He had no idea what she had done to him. I would bet my entire back account that she hadn't supplied the information. No she finally had her claws back into him and she wasn't going to screw that up again. No one else close to Eddie would tell him either. Not Max, Jake, Kelly, or even Ian. They had all promised me that if Eddie ever found out what happened during the gaps in his memory it would be because he remembered on his own. Max and Ian had put up a fight, but in the end I had won out because above all, Eddie's recovery was the most important thing to all of us. Supplying him with memories would only confused him.

"I will stay here on one condition. " I knew my mom well, too well. "Don't try to talk me into telling Eddie the truth. I know it's what you and Max, and everyone else wants but I am doing this because it's what is best. You were there that day, mom. You heard Dr. Haskins say that confusing Eddie could damage his memory. "

Before my mom could agree or disagree, the front door opened and Eddie and Phil came in laughing. Mom and I turned towards the door and both men immediately stopped. Phil's face light up when he saw me and I rushed over to give him a hug. "Hey there, daddy"

"Jesus Lo, don't you start too. Mel can't say a single sentence to me without including that word." He wrapped his arm around me pulled me close. It still amazed me that Phil and I were such good friends after so many years of complete apathy towards one another. But I was extremely grateful. I pulled back from the hug and gave Phil my best eye roll simply because when we were kids he used to say that it annoyed the crap out of him when I did that. "You are such a brat. "

I laughed and smiled, "yes but only because I can be. " My eyes found Eddies and I felt my pulse start to race. I didn't prepare myself for this visit like I should have. I wasn't ready for the way looking into those chocolate colored eyes affected me. I willed myself to keep looking at him and make it through this first encounter. The others would be a piece of cake after this, right? "Hi Eddie. How are you?"

He smiled that smile of his and my insides turned completely to mush. Damn him. "Hello Loren. It's nice to see you again. How was the trip out here?"

"It was good. Veronica drove. Do you guys remember V?" She had come with me to Phil and Adrianna's wedding.

Phil smiled a little mischievously, "blonde hair, killer ass? Yeah we remember. "

"Nice, Phil. Married five minutes and already checking other girls out. "

He held up his hands in defense, "Hey being married doesn't mean I am dead, Loren. Your friend is hot."

I rolled my eyes and slapped him in the stomach. "Jackass. "

My mom joined us by the door and asked where her groceries were to which Phil replied they were in his trunk so he and mom stepped outside to retrieve them, leaving Eddie and I completely alone.

I knew this was the best time to just start a conversation with him to prove to myself and everyone else that I could do it so I took a seat on the sofa and smiled at the man that still, after everything, made my stomach swarm with butterflies. "How is your physical therapy going?"

"Okay. It's pretty intense, but I guess that's kind of the point. "

"But it's working right?"

"Yes. Leah is determined to make me walk again. I am grateful for that at least. "

I felt my eyebrows raise and I turned my head slightly to the side, "What do you mean?"

" Leah is good at her job but she has dreams and every single sessions revolves around her endlessly going on and on about how she just needs one person to give her a chance. "

I couldn't help myself, I cracked a smile. "Sorry about that. "Eddie's eyebrows formed into the shape of a V and he looked at me questioningly so I clarified. "You kind of made me who I am overnight. My life hasn't been the same since I won your song writing contest. You gave me a chance and now everyone else wants one too. "

"That's different. You deserved it. I have heard your song. It's amazing. "

Now, that surprised me. Well maybe it shouldn't. Mom told me once that Eddie spends a lot of time on the internet trying to find out anything and everything that happened in the time frame he can't recall. Luckily the Lilly Parks of the world had never gotten confirmation of my relationship with him. All they had were pictures of us at various locations and rumors. "Thank you. "

"You're welcome. "

We sit there staring at each other for a minute, brown on brown. Its super intense, the way his eyes try so hard to read mine and I have to look away because if I don't I am terrified that he will somehow compel me to reveal all my secrets to him. "So….I have this idea. "

His tone is full of disappointment when he answers me, "ok."

"I know that you and Phil are like macho men or whatever, "I roll my eyes strictly out of habit and I see that the corners of Eddie's mouth are slightly lifted. " But since Aid doesn't have a lot of people in her corner for this shower, maybe you guys can stay. We could make it a co-ed baby shower. "A look of sheer terror crosses his flawless features and I can't help but laugh. " Geez, it's not a death sentence, Duran. It's a baby shower. "

He chuckles, "For a guy that is a death sentence, _Tate." _

He smirks at his own sarcasm and again I roll my eyes. Okay so maybe things weren't as awkward as I thought they would be. I have always made it a point to say a quick hello and then bail before we could ever have a real conversation, but this was going ok. Just as long as I remembered not to look him directly in the eyes. "Seriously, I need you to say yes because if you stay, Phil will stay and then Adam will stay."

"You really want us to stay? Me to stay?" He seemed to be surprised that I actually wanted him around. I guess I could understand that considering that I have been less than gracious around him on the occasions that I have come home to visit.

"I really do. " The look in his eyes said he was still skeptical so I took a deep breath, hoping to gain a little bit of strength for what I was about to do. I couldn't let Eddie keep thinking whatever he was obviously thinking and I couldn't tell him the truth, but maybe I could give him a variation of it. That wouldn't be spoon feeding him memories, right? "I owe you an apology." Surprise replaced skepticism in his brown orbs as I continued my explanation. "I have avoided you like the plague since you woke up from your coma and I am sorry. "

"Why?' I knew he wasn't asking why I was sorry. He wanted to know why I was avoiding him.

"Because you changed my whole life and it hurts to know you don't remember a single minute of it. I was being completely selfish and I am sorry. "All truths. " You and I were really good friends and I should have had more faith that you would still want to be my friend even if you couldn't remember me. "That was true too. Eddie and I were really good friends, and then I fell in love with him. But he didn't need to know that part. "I really am sorry. "

" I'm sorry too" I had been looking down at my hands that were clasps together on my lap when I was speaking but when he spoke those three words, my eyes darted up and before I could stop them, collided with Eddie's.

"You have no reason to be sorry. "

"I can't remember you, Loren. Or Phil, Melissa, any of them. I can't remember meeting your mom for the first time or watching my dad fall in love with her. I can't remember any damn thing. "His eyes and voice were both filled with frustration and before I could stop myself, my hand instinctively reached out and touched his. The annoying shiver that I always used to get whenever I touched Eddie made its presence known. Truth was that I actually kind of missed it. I looked down at my hand and quickly jerked it away but then I made the mistake of looking into those expressive eyes of his. He felt it too.

My mom and Phil choose that time to walk back into the house each carrying an armful of grocery bags. I pulled myself out of Eddie's confused gaze and rushed over to take some of the bags from my mom. I followed her into the kitchen and dropped the bags on the countertop. I grabbed the edge of the white counter and prayed for strength as I heard the motorized sound of Eddie's wheelchair come into the kitchen, directly behind where I was standing.

"Loren. " His voice pleaded with me to turn around and look at him, talk to him. I didn't know what he wanted from me, but I just couldn't let myself keep looking into those eyes. And under no circumstance could I ever touch him again. I put a smile, fake as could be, on my face and turned around so that I was facing him. I chose a spot on the wall behind him and fixed my eyes on it. I heard him groan in frustration.

"Everything ok? " My mom's voice was concerned as it cut through the thick tension that suddenly enveloped our kitchen. Her eyes darted between Eddie and I. I knew that she knew something relevant had happened while she was outside and I had no doubt that we would be discussing it later.

"Yep. Everything is fine, mom. "I replied in my most perky voice as I turned back to the counter and began unloading the plastic grocery bags. Behind me I heard Eddie snort at my reply but I chose to ignore him. So much for things not being awkward. Stupid shiver.

If Loren Tate thought she could avoid me forever, she was wrong. Especially now that I knew without a doubt that there was more to our "friendship" then she or anyone else was telling me. I felt the shiver that shot through her when she touched my hand earlier, but more importantly, I felt the one that shot through me. That didn't just happen by accident. There was a reason why Loren made my body react in ways that my girlfriend, who I am supposed to love, never has.

After Nora and Phil returned inside the house with the groceries, I expected Loren to shut down on me again. To forget that she had just apologized for doing that very thing, but she didn't. She included me in a conversation with her mom and Phil about San Diego and when I told Phil that I thought it would be cool if we stayed for the baby shower, she gave me a bright smile. A genuine smile. Not the fake ones she was so good at sending my way. She was making an effort to be friendly with me and while I appreciated it, I was more than a little pissed off that she wouldn't look me in the eyes. She avoided any eye contact and any opportunity to be alone with me at every turn. Further proof that there was some information missing about the status of our friendship.

The baby shower had come and gone and I am completely comfortable admitting that it had actually been a good time. Loren had been right in her assessment that a lot of people didn't support Adrianna. Aside from Nora, Loren and Veronica, Melissa, her mother and Kelly were the only other women who had shown up. It made me feel good about talking Phil into staying even though he had been completely terrorized by the idea when Loren suggested it to him. It was good that we stayed though, we had fun and it was clear that Adrianna loved that Phil had been a part of it.

Now Loren, Veronica, Melissa, Adam, Phil, Adrianna, and I sat at the picnic table in the backyard while Nora and Lisa took care of clean up duty. Loren sat comfortably between Veronica and Melissa and straight across the table from me but I still couldn't get her to meet my gaze, which had barely left her all evening.

"Did you have a good time, baby?" Phil asked as he slide an arm around his wife's shoulders.

"Yes. Thank you all so much for doing this for me. "She looked at Phil and smiled, "well for us. "

"We were glad to," Mel stated with a smile. "But mostly we did it for my little niece. She is going to be the best dressed kid in the Valley, thanks to me, Veronica and Loren. "

The girls smiled proudly. They had went in together and gotten Phil and Adrianna's baby her entire first year's wardrobe. Though I suspected, due to all the bright colors, Mel did most of the picking out. The girl had a thing for standing out. It made her entirely unique.

"Sorry, I didn't get you anything." I spoke up feeling like a jerk for not even thinking about a gift until it had been time for Adrianna and Phil open what everyone else had gotten for their daughter. "Is there anything you need that you didn't get today?"

Before Adrianna could answer, Melissa piped in, "You should give her an autograph. I bet by time the little Princess grows up, an Eddie Duran autograph will be worth millions. "

"I doubt that." I couldn't contain the bitter edge to my voice and I felt a certain someone's brown eyes on mine, although she took the care to not look directly into my own brown eyes.

"Why do you say that?" Mel asked curiously.

I shrugged my shoulders as if it was no big deal, "Jake and the guys at the label are just a little frustrated that I haven't released anything since Something in the Air. They are ready for another hit. "

Loren shook her head, "Why don't they just let you release One Day At A Time? " As soon as the words left her mouth she clasped her hand over her mouth and her brown eyes doubled in size. I saw from the corner of my eyes that the other occupants of the table were exchanging nervous looks.

"So um…Lo, you know what Aid and I were talking about the other day? That time she framed you for cheating on the….." Melissa tried to change the subject but I wasn't having it as I held my hand up to silence her.

"Loren, what is One Day At a Time?" I had a firmness in my voice that I didn't know existed but damn it, I wanted an answer. I didn't like not knowing about my own damn life. She shook her head and stood up but I anticipated her move and reached out to grab her arm. I ignored the fact that once again, a shiver at the contact of my skin and hers connecting, ran down my spine. "Tell me."

"Talk to Jake. Just ask him about it. "She tried to pull away but I tightened my hold. I wasn't hurting her but I wasn't letting her run away either. Not this time. I heard chairs scraping on the concrete as the others stood up and decided to give us privacy. Once the patio door closed and we were alone, I let my hold loosen only slightly. "It's not a big deal Eddie, just ask Jake. "

"If it's not a big deal, Loren, just tell me." The tightness of my voice made us both wince. I really wasn't trying to be difficult but I needed to know and I needed Loren to tell me. "Please."

She closed her eyes and let out a ragged breath. "You wrote it a little while before your accident. The label didn't really like it. You played it for some of your fans and the reaction wasn't great. "There was a note of annoyance in her tone as she explained and I couldn't help but wonder what that was all about. I didn't have to wonder long. "It is a beautiful song. Everyone was so scared to deviate away from the image and sound that you already had that no one was willing to take a chance on the song. I thought it was dumb then and if they are on your back now, it's dumb of them to still not release it."

Suddenly it occurred to me why the song was so different from what I usually wrote, "let me guess, I wrote it after I found out about Chloe?" According to the online tabloids. Chloe and I hit a rough patch a couple of months before I had my accident. Chloe had lied to me about some of the things in her past such as her real name and hometown. Oh and the big whooper that her mother was actually alive. Some reports had us broken up but most of them just referred to our problems as a bump in the road. I had no idea what to think. Chloe swore to me that we had never broken up but when I asked my dad and Nora to confirm that they simply told me that things between Chloe and I were complicated. They didn't elaborate any further but I knew my pop well enough to know he wanted to tell me more. He wouldn't though and if my guess is right the girl sitting across from me right now was the very reason. My dad told me himself that he couldn't fill in any of my memory gaps because the doctor told him not to but if it were up to him, I know Pop would tell me every single thing he could. No, Loren Tate had more to do with all of this than she was letting on.

"I admit that the song is way different than anything you've ever written before, but it is so amazing. It deserves to be recorded. By you. Just make Jake let you listen to it. You'll see that I am right. "She smiled softly but still didn't meet my eyes. Apparently she had some fascination with my chin though because that's where her eyes were focused.

"Thank you for telling me. " I released her hand and was surprised when she didn't retreat right away. Instead she refocused her eyes so that they were staring at the exact spot my hand had been holding hers. She was feeling the loss of our contact too.

I didn't understand what the hell was happening here but I was damn sure going to find out. I needed to remember my time with Loren. I need it more than I needed to walk again.


	4. Chapter 3

**A/N: Ok, so does anyone remember this story? I haven't forgotten. I know I suck for taking forever to update. I am sorry. I know where this headed but with my outline only touching on certain things happening in each chapter, it made this one difficult. My outline is right on my desk, mocking me every time I pass it. I finally got my thoughts back in order to write this out. The outline originally called for a big argument between Eddie and Loren but when I sat down and started writing this came out. After this chapter…things get even more complicated for our Leddie. But this chapter sets it all up…including Eddie's plan and Loren's agreement to be friends with him. Please leave me a review and let me know what you think **

"So today wasn't so terrible. " Veronica stated as she handed me a mug of hot chocolate and joined me on the living room sofa. It was close to midnight and everyone else had finally gone to bed. Eddie had finally gone to bed. It made me nervous that my mom declared veronica and I stay here with her until we were able to find our own place. She claimed it was because Mel's place was in a bad neighborhood. Of course that wasn't the real reason. I knew it and my mom knew I knew it. She wanted me to be here so that I would have to deal with Eddie. So I couldn't avoid him.

Max seemed to be on the same bandwagon because at least twice during dinner, he brought up something for my past with Eddie. Things that didn't need to be brought up. _Grace and I were_ _talking about Eddie's birthday dinner the other night. Do you remember that night Loren? _ Seriously? Of course I remember it. That was the night Eddie had kissed me for the first time. And Max damn well knew that. Of course the mention of it sent the mouthful of Pepsi I had just taken flying across the table at my roommate but she took it in stride with a small chuckle and raised eyebrow. Eddie however looked from me to max and back to me again several times waiting for one of us to explain but when neither of us did, he let out a resigned sigh and continued digging into his pot roast. I sent a glare to Max but he just smiled innocently back at me. I wanted nothing more than to fling a spoonful of mashed potatoes at him. Apparently my maturity was still in San Diego.

The next occurrence came while we were all siting in the living room watching a rerun of Gilmore Girls. Mom and I loved that show and were devastated when it was cancelled. We were sure to catch it when the reruns came on. I had just mentioned to Veronica that I used to have the same t-shirt that Lorelei was wearing in the episode when Max so helpfully said that it was in my room. _Your mom and I found it the last time we were at the bungalow. You must have left it there that weekend you and Eddie were up there. _ I felt Eddie's eyes on me immediately but I refused to meet them. Instead I shot an angry look at Max, who once again had the nerve to look all innocent. Jerk face!

"No it wasn't. Well not the baby shower anyway. "

Veronica pushed her blonde hair behind her hair and took a small sip of the chocolaty concoction in her mug. "It could have been worse. "

"I know. But thanks to Max it was beyond awkward. "

"Loren, you can't be mad at Max for doing what the rest of us so badly want you to do. Eddie deserves to know. "

I shook my head. "Veronica…"

"I know. The doctor advised against filling in the blanks. You don't want to disrupt Eddie's life. You don't want him to settle for you. I have heard all your excuses, Lo. Just like everyone else. And just like everyone else I think its bull." I glared at her but didn't say anything. "Loren, why are you so afraid to just tell him the truth? I helped you do the research. We both know that the chances of Eddie ever getting all his memories back are slim."

She was right. We had spent countless hours reading case study after case study and came to the same answer every time. If Eddie hasn't remembered by now, he may never. Most amnesia patients have a mild case and the condition is temporary. Usually blocked out by painful memories or traumatic events, the memories usually resurface within a few weeks. A select few cases last around six months. But not a single patient with the same frontal lobe injury as Eddie has reported regaining more than a handful of their missing memories. Chances were good that Eddie would never ever remember me or our relationship. "Which is exactly why I have to move on. "

"I agree with you but I still think Eddie deserves to know everything that happened. "

"He knows what he needs to know, V. He is happy with Chloe. I am not going to ruin it for him by filling him in on the way she ripped his heart to shreds. He doesn't remember the pain he felt and I am not about to cause it again. She nearly destroyed him. "

"But he got over her. Because of you Loren. You helped him move on. "

I took a drink of my hot chocolate then stared down into the gooey mess as the warm liquid made its way down my throat. "I don't think he ever did get over Chloe. "

"Are you serious? Loren…"

"I am serious. I was a distraction to him. I helped him forget his pain for a little while. "

"I don't believe that at all and neither do you. He loved you, Loren. "

"How do you know? I don't even know. He never said those words to me. He never told Max or Ian. Or even Jake. But he did love Chloe. I heard him say it; I saw it in his eyes. He loved her then and he loves her now. I don't have a place in Eddie's life anymore. "

"So you can't even be friends with him now? Come on Loren. "

I sat my cup down on the coffee table in front of us and turned so that I was facing Veronica, "says the girl who won't even answer the phone when Logan Echolls calls. "

"My issues with Logan are way different than yours with Eddie. Logan messed up. He broke my heart. Eddie didn't do anything to hurt you, Loren. He was in the wrong place at the wrong time and he almost lost his life. "

My eyes snapped to hers, "I know that, Veronica. I spent every single day at the hospital. I was by his side every second. I prayed, I yelled, I cried, all I wanted was for him to get better. To wake up. To be ok." I couldn't hold my emotions back anymore. I didn't bother to wipe my tears as they made their way down my cheeks. I ignored the pain in my voice. "Max had to practically ban me from the room for a couple of hours every day so that I would come home and nap. I was here, asleep the day he woke up. My mom and Max woke me up and told me that he couldn't remember the accident or anything after being on his last tour. I was devastated. I let them convince me to go with them to see him. He was asleep. I sat there, by his side, just like I had so many times. Only this time he woke up. And he asked for Chloe. He asked for her, Veronica. He wanted her. "

"Because he didn't know you. Not because he didn't want you. "

"But shouldn't his heart want me even if his brain can't remember me? "

Veronica pulled me to her and hugged me. "I don't know, girl. I am not the one to ask about matters of the heart. "I let myself breakdown in my friend's embrace for a few minutes before I finally pulled myself together. I couldn't fall apart now, or ever again. I need to be strong. That's the only way this can work. It's the only way I will be able to survive under the same roof as Eddie. I had my one and only weak moment. Back to business as usual.

Pulling out of Veronica's embrace, I gave her a smile. "sorry. "

"Don't be. This what friends do, right." She stood up and motioned towards my room. "I am gonna crash. You coming?"

"Yeah in a minute. I wanna lock up and clean up these cups. "I watched as she made her way down the hall to my room before I moved to the door and turned the lock. Grabbing our mugs, I headed towards the kitchen. I had just rinsed the remaining hot chocolate out of my mug and was starting on Veronica's when I heard a noise behind me. I swung around and found Eddie making his way to the kitchen in his wheelchair. "Hey."

"Hi. I just needed a drink of water. "He moved to the fridge and pulled out a bottle of water. " Could you hand me that bottle of pills on the microwave?"

I dried my hands on a towel and grabbed the prescription bottle off the microwave. "'How many?" He replied that he needed two and I dispensed them for him, placing the bottle back in its place. I walked over closer to him and dropped the two white capsules into his open palm. Eddie tosses them in his mouth and took a long drink from his water. Once he hand swallowed the medication, he recapped the water. "Thanks. "

I smiled at him softly, "No problem. " I was about to turn back to washing out the mugs when his voice called out my name. "Hmm."

"I don't know what I did to you, but I am sorry. "

Well damn. "You didn't do anything to be sorry for. "

"Apparently I did. Why else are you so distance? "

Crap, crap, crap. What the hell was I supposed to say to that? Standing here perched at my kitchen sink looking over at the man I love who was clearly confused and judging by the look on his face, hurt. I couldn't lie to him. I couldn't tell him the whole truth either, though. "I just don't want to complicate your life Eddie. " I walked over to the table and sat down. He maneuvered his wheelchair into his normal space across from where I was sitting.

"Why would you and I being friends complicate my life? Our parents are practically married, Loren. That makes us family. "

"I know that. I am grateful every day that your dad came into my mom's life. "The words came out way harsher than I meant them too and I took a small breath to calm myself down. "Winning that contest didn't just change my life, Eddie. It changed my mom's too. She finally met a man that loves her, and me, unconditionally. I will forever be grateful to both of you for that. "

"I am glad to hear that my dad means something to you. "

"So do you. " He gave me a disbelieving look. I guess I couldn't really blame him for that. I haven't been very fair to him. One minute I am friendly to him and the next I am avoiding him. "Eddie, I mean it. If it wasn't for you I never would have followed my dream. You had more faith in me than I did myself. I won't ever forget that. "

"Then why do you act like it's an imposition to be in the same room with me. I mean, everyone always tell me what great friends we were but I just don't see it. You never want to have a conversation with me; you are always running away from me. "His voice was pleading with me to explain. I didn't really know how to handle this.

"I told you that I don't want to complicate your life. "

"You aren't. "

Turning back to the sink, I took a deep breath and went for the only answer that would get me out of this. "I promised Chloe I would stay away from you. "

I don't know how long I sat there, behind Loren not saying a single word. Trying to process what she had just told me. She finished washing her coffee mugs and placed them on the wooden drying rack and wiped down the sink and counter tops before finally turning back to me. She didn't meet my eyes, of course, but she was facing me. She didn't say anything either. She just stood there¸ leaning against the counter top with her hands clasped together in front of her. The silence was awkward.

She promised Chloe she would stay away from me. What the hell?! "I don't understand. " I finally said breaking the overwhelming silence.

"Look, Chloe hates me, ok. She has hated me since the second we met. She hated us working together. Basically she hates that I exist period. "

"So what?" Chloe's feelings towards Loren didn't matter to me. Who the hell was she to not like Loren anyway?

"So, you and I working together, being friends, made Chloe uncomfortable. "

"I repeat, so what?" 'Chloe had no right to decide who I can and cannot be friends with. I would never do that to her.

"So us working so closely together made people talk. I am sure that you've read the gossip about us. It wasn't fair to Chloe. "

It was getting harder and harder for me to keep my anger from spilling over. Fair to Chloe? Seriously?! The girl lied to me about every major detail of her past. She didn't even fill in the blanks when I first woke up. I had to read the truth about her mother and hometown from the blood hounds that call themselves reporters. "Loren what does that have to do with you and I being friends now?"

"After you woke up from the coma and you and Chloe had some time together, she came to see me. It was the day before I decided to leave town. She expressed to me how much she loved you and how much you loved her. She said that you guys deserved a fair shot at making your relationship work and you wouldn't get that if the media kept referring to our working relationship and friendship as me being the other woman. She asked me to step back and I did. I wanted you to be happy. Chloe makes you happy. "

Loren ended her little speech and silence fell upon us again. While she may have thought her little rambling episode sounded good, it hadn't. Particularly because of the way her breath hitched every time she said Chloe's name or how she kept closing and opening her hands into fists. Maybe it was the truth or some version of it. But there was more. Something inside me screamed that this wasn't the full story. "So you just decided that our friendship could just be pushed aside. "

"Come on Eddie, you don't even remember meeting me. It's not rocket science. You don't remember even being friends with me. You are in a relationship with Chloe and I made her uncomfortable. I stepped aside because it's what was best. "

"For who?"

"For everyone. Chloe and I are never going to get along. It's not fair for you to have to deal with that."

Unbelievable! Chloe and Loren think that they can just decide what is best for me without even letting me have a say in the matter?! "So I can't be friends with you but its ok for me to be friends with your friends? Chloe is okay with that?"

Loren shrugged her shoulders and moved to sit at the table. I spun my chair around so that I was sitting next to her in my usual spot. "I think that she actually likes Adrianna. And Mel isn't a threat to Chloe. She wasn't working with you every day. I don't think she necessarily likes it but she accepts it. "

"That's the stupidest thing I have ever heard. This whole fucking thing is stupid. " I didn't even care that the volume of my voice was way too loud considering that it was nearly one o'clock in the morning and our parents and Veronica were just down the hall sleeping. " You don't get to decide what is best for me, Loren. "

She looked surprised at my tone but quickly covered it. "It's what is best for everyone. "

"That's bull. I don't care if Chloe is uncomfortable or not. I don't tell her who she can be friends with and she sure as hell doesn't get to tell me who I can be friends with. "

"Look, I am sorry that you don't understand this Eddie, but…"

I shook my head, "Let me ask you something. Were you just using me to jumpstart your career?"

A look of hurt crossed over Loren's face. Just like I thought it would. "Of course not. "

"So when you entered your song into the contest you had no expectations at all?"

"I didn't even enter my song. Mel did and told me about it after. I was embarrassed and thought I didn't have a chance. "

Well no one had told me that part, but it didn't really matter. I knew before I even asked the question that Loren wasn't that kind of girl. She didn't have a manipulative bone in her body. But I am angry and I am tired of everyone skating around my friendship with Loren. No one wants to tell me anything about Loren and I before my accident. If it was all as innocent as a friendship then why was it such a secret? "So when we started hanging out and working together, you had a good time? You were happy?"

"Yes. " Her answer was spoken softly and her tone was resigned.

"Then why was it so easy for you to push me aside? Why do you constantly run away from me? "

"You think it was easy for me? You think I like pretending like you and I were nothing? That you weren't one of the greatest friends I have ever had? Do you seriously think that it doesn't take every ounce of will power I have to walk away from you? Why do you think I moved away from here?" Loren was angry now too and practically had fire coming out of her brown eyes.

"You left town because of me?"

Loren closed her eyes and shook her head. Obviously she hadn't meant to say that and had been caught up in her anger. Good. Maybe if I keep making her angry she will tell me the truth. "No, that's not what I meant. "

"Then what did you mean? Come on, Loren. Let's hear it. If I was such a great friend, how could you just turn your back on me? Especially after my accident. When I needed friends the most. "

"You had plenty of people to help you Eddie, you didn't need me. "

"How do you know I didn't need you? You cut and run before I even got out of the hospital. You didn't even say goodbye to me. But I bet you said goodbye to all your other friends, didn't you, Loren. Mel, Phil, Adam, Adrianna. They all got goodbyes right. "I was walking a thin line here but I didn't care. Every instinct told me that Loren was the answer to all my missing memories. She was my missing memories. I would do whatever I have to do to make her talk to me. Even make her hate me.

"So you wanted me, someone you don't even remember, to come into your hospital room and give you some long drawn out sappy goodbye?"

I shrugged my shoulders," Why not? If we were such great friends, you should have said goodbye to me. You should have visited me more than that one time when I woke up. "

"You mean that one time when you asked for Chloe?" She practically spat the words out.

"That would be the time. Why didn't you ever come back after that? Your mom, who I didn't remember either by the way came to see me every day. Mel and the others too. But not you. No, I saw you once and then you were just gone." I made a snapping noise with my fingers and then continued my rant, "just gone. No visit, no call, no letter. Nothing. And all I heard while you were gone was how great you were and how we were such fantastic friends. I actually started to believe it. Until you came home that first time that is. "

I saw her tense and knew that she knew exactly what I was referring to.

"You barely said two sentences to me, Loren. And even that had to be forced out of you. You wouldn't look at me. You even switched seats with Pop at dinner so you didn't have to sit next to me. Do you know how that made me feel? Do you care?" She didn't say anything but she flinched at my words. I knew she cared. Maybe this tactic wasn't the best one, but if it got me the information I needed, it would be worth a few stinging words and low blows. "Do you care, Loren?"

"Yes, I care. Of course I do. But I promised Chloe…"

"When? When did you make that promise to Chloe?"

"The day you woke up. She asked me to stay away. For your own good. "

"Neither you or Chloe have a right to decide what to is good for me. "

"Look, I am sorry ok. Is that what you want? An apology?" Her voice was cold as spoke, raising her voice slightly. "I am so sorry, that I dared to care enough about what was best for you. I am sorry that I wanted your happiness more than I wanted my own. "

"Loren, look, this conversation just got completely…"

"No, you wanted this conversation. You started this. You wanna know why I didn't say goodbye to you Eddie? Do you really want to know?'

"Yes."

"Because I couldn't. I didn't say goodbye because I couldn't. It would have made it too real. "

"I don't understand. "

"Saying goodbye would have killed me. You were my best friend, Eddie. "

"Melissa is your best friend and you said goodbye to her. "

"I knew I would be seeing her again. I wasn't planning on seeing you again. I figured you would be released from the hospital and dive back into your career and the next time I came home, you'd be off on tour or following Chloe around on her modeling escapades or something. I didn't know that your back would be so messed up and you wouldn't be able to walk. I wasn't expecting that. I didn't even find out about it until I was already in San Diego. "

"If you had stuck around you would have known. "

"If I had said goodbye to you, it would have been so final. I thought it would be the last time I ever spoke to you. I couldn't deal with that so I ignored it. I just left. "She sounded sad, maybe even a little bit ashamed.

"Our parents are together. How could you really believe we would never see each other? I moved in here as soon as I was released from the hospital. "

"I didn't know that at the time, Eddie. I had no idea that you would end up living in my house, across the hall from my room. I really did think that I wouldn't see you again. We didn't really have any reason to. I had already promised Chloe that I would keep my distance. "

"I believe you. " I did. I don't believe she intentionally meant to hurt my feelings but she had. "I don't like that you and Chloe made a decision about my life, but I respect that you were trying to keep your promise. I don't like that it was just so easy for you to bail on me and a friendship that you claim meant something to you. I don't like that I can't remember you or what we did together. I don't like that I have to be in this stupid wheelchair. "

"I'm sorry. " She reached across the table and put a hand on my arm which was resting there. I felt the shiver that her touch caused and from the flash in her eyes she felt it too. But she ignored it. "I didn't mean to hurt you Eddie. "

"But you did. You do. Every time you shut me out or run away, it hurts me. "There wasn't any reason why we both had to keep our feelings a secret. Just because she was bound and determined not to reveal her true feelings doesn't mean I have to suppress mine. I didn't make any stupid promise to Chloe.

"I really am sorry. "

"I know. I believe you. "She started to pull her hand back but I captured it with mine. " Look, Loren, I don't care what you promised Chloe. That is null and void starting now. She doesn't get to decide if you and I are friends. "

"Eddie, she is your girlfriend. What she wants is important. "

I nodded my agreement, "Of course it is important. But what I want is too. "

"What do you want, Eddie?"

I looked down at our hands. Touching her even something as simple as holding her hand, stirred something inside me. Something I didn't quite understand. Something I am not even sure that I can even explain. But it's there and it makes me feel good. Better than I have in months. "I want you. "

A look I couldn't even begin to name passed over Loren's face. Interesting. Very, very interesting. Telling as well. There is no possible way that the only thing I scared with this girl was friendship. Not with the way she looked when I said I wanted her and not with the way I feel when I touch her or she touches me. There was more, much more.

"You want me?"

I have to tread lightly here. I can't put all my cards on the table right now. I have to do this right; I have to make her tell me the truth. I have to know everything. There is only one way I can do that. As the plan formulated in my mind, I smiled what I hoped was a sexy smile at Loren. "I want you in my life. I want us to be friends. "Now all she had to do was agree. Forget the promise you made to Chloe, Loren. Listen to what I told you a little bit ago.

"Okay."

I smiled again, "okay?"

She nodded. "I promise not to avoid you anymore. No more running away. "

"Good." To say that I was pleased was the understatement of the year. I was thrilled beyond words. Not just because maybe Loren would finally let you guard down, but because I finally had a plan and now that she had agreed to reinstate the friendship I couldn't remember, things would be a lot easier. I have never been one to play games, not that this was in any way a game, but sometimes life just required us all to be a little bit sneaky and to cheat a little to get ahead.

"Its way past my bed time. " Loren said pulling her hand out of my hold and standing up. "I need to get some sleep. Tomorrow is a busy day. "

"What is going on tomorrow?"

"Mel, Veronica, and I are going to help Adrianna set up the baby's nursery. "

"Will that take all day?"

"Probably most of it at least, why?'

"How about we get everyone together tomorrow night for dinner?"

She was quiet for a minute and I was sure that she would tell me no, but instead she smiled, "That sounds good. Do you wanna go out or stay in?"

"In. How about I call Rumor and order a bunch of food and we just hang out here?"

She nodded. "Ok. "

"Awesome. I will call Ian in the morning and see if he wants in."

"Great."

"Goodnight Eddie."

"Goodnight Loren."

She smiled at me once more and then I watched her make her way down the hall and into her room. This dinner would either be the best thing to happen in a long time or the worst because I was planning on inviting Chloe and making things clear to her. Loren is going to be in my life, whether my girlfriend likes it or not. I am finished letting people control my life and make decisions for me. Putting my foot down with Chloe is just the beginning. Loren will tell me the truth about our past together, even if I have to trick her into it. I have a right to know about my own life. And if my intuition is correct, Loren meant way more to me than just an ordinary friend. An ordinary friend wouldn't make me feel the things I am feeling right now.

**A/N: ok so there is chapter 3. Did it suck? I needed to move the story into the next stage which is Eddie's plan. This chapter was intended to set some of that up…but Eddie will run into some unexpected roadblocks. Especially at the dinner. Review, review, review. **

**A little preview of the next few chapters:**

**Eddie confronts Chloe.**

**Loren confronts Max.**

**Mel and Veronica decide to meddle.**

**Ian has a plan of his own. **

**Chloe confronts Loren**

**Eddie pulls Max and Nora into his plan**

**Cameron makes an appearance as does Trent**

**Loren decides to play matchmaker**

**A very awkward and drama filled dinner party**

**Veronica and Loren face a challenge in their friendship **

**Cameron experiences a case of loose-lips in front of Eddie**


	5. Chapter 4

**AN:**_** 38 pages, 17,540 words….before this author's note! Completely crazy! I hope this makes up for the long update drought. Life is completely crazy in my house these days **__**L**__** But I haven't forgotten this, will not forget it and I will finish it. There is still so much story to tell. **_

_**A couple things about this chapter. In addition to Eddie ( whose POV was super long this time ) and Loren's POVs, I also added Nora and Max POVs just for this chapter. I will occasionally add other POVs as it pertains to the chapter. Also, Logan ( from Veronica Mars ) makes his debut in this chapter. As I stated before , this is not a crossover story, I just love Logan and Veronica and the fact that the show was cancelled before they had any sort of closure eats away at me and they just randomly pop up. In this story they have a purpose…..Veronica will play a major part in Eddie's life in the future. And Logan is needed to give Veronica a little something to do before she adds something completely unexpected to Eddie's ever mounting pile of stress. For those of you who aren't familiar with VM (Veronica is played by Kristen Bell and Logan by Jason Dohring-Google images of Jason, I promise you won't be sorry). Anyway, I alluded to some events in this chapter that went down between L and V that isn't fully explained so that's what this part is for. In the final few eps of VMs Veronica and Logan have been broken up for a little while, both dating others. Logan finds out about a video of Veronica and her boyfriend circulating around the web and naturally assumes that Piz leaked it. He beats the crap out of him. Veronica is angry and ends her relationship with Logan once and for all, telling him she doesn't even want to be his friend. Logan is crushed. Veronica is able to prove that Piz didn't leak the video (She never believed he did) and that it was a kid connected to the mob that actually taped V and P and posted the video. Logan overhears the guy threatening V and despite her telling him to stay out of it and that he's connected, Logan pummels the guy. Mob guy threatens to kill Logan but he just says he has to go sometime. He steps over the guy and in front of Veronica apologizes to her boyfriend. He gives her a smile and then walks away. Veronica stares after him in awe….and that is how the whole damn series ends…talk about a cliffhanger. See what I mean about no closure? Ridiculous! Anyway, I just wanted you guys to have a little bit of background because these events are alluded to in this part. And I also want to offer any of you that may be interested….I have all three seasons of VM on my computer….I would be more than happy to make you DVDs. Just PM me. And that leads me to my favor….yea I am selfish.**_

_**I am in desperate need of Hollywood Heights episodes. All 80 of them! I know, it's asking a lot but I have dial up and me downloading the episodes is next to impossible. I am willing to pay all expenses of downloading fees, materials and shipping. Or if anyone has the eps on their dvr and has a vcr…I would even settle for vhs tapes. I will be starting flashbacks for this fic soon and I need to have every detail right. Can anyone help me? **_

_**Now onto this chapter….it was my intention to focus on Eddie's confusion here. He feels in his gut that he shared something with Loren and its confused him but also brought him out of his stupor…kind of. Reviews, please **__**J**___

_**Oh and I didn't have the time to edit so please forgive any and all mistakes. I own them. But I don't own Hollywood Heights, Eddie , Loren, or anyone else in this story :( If I did...the men would forever me shirtless. **_

**Eddie**

The smell of bacon pulled me out of my deep, dreamless sleep the next morning. I sat up and looked across the room at my clock as the glowing red numbers seem to mock me. I wasn't a morning person but grimaced at the fact that I had slept way later than I wanted to. I had a meeting with Jake today and he'd be here in less than an hour.

Given that it was after nine, I assumed that most of the household was probably already up, around and possibly out. Loren was probably already gone. I wouldn't get to talk to her this morning. Long after our kitchen talk last night, she had stayed on my mind. Not that she was ever really far from it. At least not since she had returned home yesterday. Truth be told, she has occupied a portion of my mind since I woke up in that cold sterile hospital and had been introduced to her. Something about her had drawn me in even back then. Even all the times that she worked her hardest to ignore me or completely avoid being around me, I was curious about the brunette beauty and my connection to her. Thanks to the intense pain in my back last night, I had a better idea of how to handle things now. That pain had caused my need for a pill which lead to the late night talk with Nora's daughter.

Anger still hummed through me that Loren and Chloe had made a deal about my life without my knowledge. I didn't understand it at all. Everyone keeps telling me how Loren and I were such great friends, and though that explained the connection I felt to her, a nagging feeling left me with an overwhelming need to find out if my relationship with the brunette was more profound. Is that why I feel this unexplainable distance between Chloe and I? Did I cheat on Chloe with Loren? Is that why they so obviously disliked each other? Is that why they made a ridiculous deal? Is that why I feel this unbelievable pull towards Loren?

I wasn't the cheating kind. It was a rarity in my business, I know, but it existed sometimes. Always with me. I learned everything I need to know about being a one woman man from my father. He had been lusted after years ago but he never had eyes for anyone but my mom. Ever. I can remember him drilling into me when I was getting ready for my first date that girls were always to be respected, never to be taken advantage of, and being honest, devoted and faithful to one woman at a time were qualities that I needed to possess in order to be what he considered a good man. Being a good man, like my father, was what I aspired to be. So the thought that maybe I had gone against my own moral compass, and strayed from Chloe disgusted me. But this pull towards Loren didn't make sense to me. Unless there was more to us than friendship. Touching her had my body, even the numb parts, on high alert. A desire to just be near her consumed me. Friends didn't feel that way about each other. They just didn't.

Chloe told me herself that despite a fight after the revelation that her mother was alive and she had lied about her name and hometown, our relationship was as strong as ever. I had even proposed marriage to her. Given her a ring and everything. So obviously we were on solid ground before my accident. No one else in my life had refuted her claims so the only possible reason I could feel so connected to another girl is that I was unfaithful. If not physically, then at least emotionally. Maybe I hadn't cross the line with Loren but what if I wanted to? What if that's why I feel so strongly about her? Isn't emotionally cheating just as bad as physically cheating? Maybe worse? I had so many questions and now answers and it left me confused, frustrated and angry.

Since I woke up from my coma, my life has been an emotional train wreck. I waver between anger, depression, self-pity and resentment on a daily basis. Snapping at my pop and Nora is basically an everyday occurrence. They never deserve it but they are here and so I use them as verbal punching bags. The thing that always gets me is that they let me. Sometimes Nora will yell back and tell me I am being a jerk, but usually she just looks at me with those understanding brown eyes of hers and takes my abuse. It sucks and I hate myself for it. Pop is the same way. He just lets me yell and vent and occasionally throw things. He never yells back or tells me that I am a jackass, though I clearly am. I don't deserve their devotion. I am angry that my back is hurt and I have to transport myself in a wheelchair rather than on the legs God gave me. I am angry that I can't remember a huge chunk of my life. I am angry that I spend day in and day out staring at a blank sheet of paper willing song lyrics to magically appear but they never do. I am angry because when I look at my girlfriend...err...fiancée; I don't feel the overwhelming love that I once did. But mostly I am angry because the man that ruined my life is dead and not feeling a single thing that I am. It's not fair.

Pulling myself out of my dark thoughts before they lead me into a bout of depression I really don't want to deal with today, I throw back my covers and position myself to the side of my bed. My ever present mode of transportation is at the ready and I effortlessly drag myself into it. This was my routine now and it stopped being difficult long ago. A glance at my appearance in the full length mirror on the closet door told me that I was at least presentable enough in my black wife beater and navy blue sweatpants to eat breakfast. Even my messy mass of dark hair didn't matter at this point. I stopped caring about how I look a long time ago. Like the second a med student informed me that I couldn't walk.

Using the remote pad on the arm of my chair, I made my way out of my room and into the kitchen expecting to find Nora at the stove but instead found a petite blonde with a messy ponytail and 'My Little Pony' pajamas popping toast out of the toaster. I was a man of course, even if the lower half of my body wasn't functioning properly, and I couldn't deny that Veronica Mars was beautiful girl.

"Good morning, Veronica." I greeted as I made my way to the table and found a bowl of my favorite cereal waiting sans milk at my usual spot. On the days that I didn't join my Pop and Nora for breakfast, they always made sure it was ready for me.

Veronica smiled at me as she took the seat across from me and started buttering her slightly darkened bread. "Good morning. I hope I didn't wake you with all my puttering around. Loren neglected to show me where anything is. "She bit into the toast and sat it down on her plate.

"No you didn't. Loren already gone?" I couldn't help feeling disappointed. I had really wanted to talk to her this morning and make sure she wasn't having second thoughts about us being friends.

"Yeah, she had errands to run and something about a meeting with Kelly. " Loren's friend made a face when she said the other woman's name.

I picked up the gallon of milk in the middle of the table and poured a fair amount over my cereal before sitting it back down on the table. "Do you not like Kelly?"

"It's not that. Well, maybe a little. I just don't think she has the best of intentions about Loren's career sometimes. "She picked up a plate of bacon and sausage and offered it to me. I happily took a piece of each because well I am a man and I need meat to survive. "Like last month Loren wanted to play a concert for some fans at this little pub across from our apartment for free and Kelly freaked out. I don't get what the big deal is but she absolutely didn't want Lo to do it and Loren being the people pleaser that she is, didn't. And now we are barely back in town and Kelly is calling at the freaking crack of dawn for a meeting knowing Loren already has plans for the day." She bit off another piece of toast and chewed with the shake of her head. Obviously she cared about Loren. It made me like her more than I already did.

I liked Veronica the first time I met her, at Phil and Adrianna's wedding. She was one of the few people that met me and didn't seem to care that I was a famous singer or in a wheelchair. She just joked that I was the luckiest person in the room because I had two wheels to help me escape the torture of mingling with the bride and groom's family members whereas she had a pair of toe-killing contraptions on her feet that made it impossible to stand let alone walk or run. She was charming.

"Well, I don't really know Kelly that well, but I don't really like the sound of that. Loren should be in control of her career. "Good advice, if only I could make it apply to myself. Instead, I basically let Jake direct me these days. Of course I didn't really have much of a career to direct. I haven't written a song in longer than I care to admit to and it didn't feel as though that would be changing anytime soon.

"Exactly. But Loren still thinks this whole thing is too good to be true and if she speaks up or goes against something it will all be taken away. "

"That's crazy. She deserves to be where she is. "

"Of course she does. Lo is the most talented chick I know but she has absolutely no faith in herself. It really gets on my nerves. "She rolled her blue eyes as she ended her statement.

"You care about her a lot. " It wasn't hard to tell that fact. It actually made me a little envious. Did anyone care about me that much? Sure my Pop, maybe Ian. Sometimes Jake. But did anyone ever truly have my back?

Veronica nodded, "Loren is my best friend. I love her." She said it simply and like it was the most nature thing in the world. It was the same way Melissa always referred to Loren too. Like the fact that Loren was her best friend was as much a part of her as the color of her hair. "How about your career, Mr. Duran?"

I snorted, "What career?"

"That bad?"

I nodded, "I can't write a single thing. I am completely blocked." The depression was starting to creep in but I pushed it back out, I couldn't let it consume me anymore. I wouldn't. "Jake, my manager, is beyond frustrated. The label too. "

Veronica frowned. "Loren has notebook after notebook of songs. Don't you have something like that?"

"I did." I sighed heavily and ran a hand through my messy hair. "I have a lot of anger about my accident. Before I came to live here, I stayed a couple of nights at my place. I was feeling especially angry and sorry for myself one night and in a blind rage I destroyed everything." I wasn't proud in the least.

Her eyebrows shot up, "everything?"

I nodded again. "Everything I didn't have to stand up to reach. Books, CDs, awards, song journals. Anything I could get my hands. Obviously I regret that now." Looking back I know it wasn't the way to handle things but my anger is so consuming sometimes. Most times.

To her credit, Veronica didn't seem to be judging me. She slide her breakfast plate away looked at me with sad eyes. "When I was in high school, my best friend was murdered. Lilly and I were like inseparable and her death messed me up. A little while later, I was at a party and someone drugged and raped me. "

My breath hitched at her confession and instinctively my hands closed into fists. I hated violence against women, especially rape.

"My mom left my dad and I soon after that. I was a mess. Anger was pretty much the only emotional I knew back then. Those things changed me. Some would say for the worst, but I think it was for the better. I was stronger somehow. I wasn't this perfect little girly girl anymore. I cut my hair short, changed my wardrobe and no longer took crap from anyone. "

I didn't know what to say. It didn't seem like enough but I found myself going with, "I'm sorry. "

The blonde smiled at me, "I appreciate that. But my point is that sometimes we need to turn the anger into something productive. I changed my appearance, but I also threw myself into my dad's business. I was the best secret PI at Neptune High."

I smiled at that. How could I not? "Seriously? "

"Yep."

"That's kind of cool. " It really was too.

She smiled, "It really was. I loved it. Still do. There is just something about solving everyone else's problems. "She leaned back in her chair and folded her arms against her chest. " I tend to run from my own. "

"Is that how you ended up in San Diego?"

"Yep. I fell in love with a boy who completely destroyed my heart and I couldn't deal with seeing him all the time so I bailed. Luckily, Loren was running too and we both ended up at the same place looking for an apartment." She smiled fondly.

"What was Loren running from?" I probably shouldn't have asked but her words left me wondering. Had Loren run away from a broken heart too? The mere idea of that made me angry that she would ever have to feel any kind of pain.

Veronica's eyes enlarged and she bit her lip. Obviously she hadn't meant for me to pick up on her little slip. For a minute I was sure she was gonna lie, but she surprised me. "You." And then before I could question her further she disappeared from the table and down the hall.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

I sat in the kitchen after Veronica left staring into my half eaten bowl of cereal. Loren left town because of me. I thought she left for school that's what everyone had said. Loren got a chance to go to SDU on a part-time scholarship and she couldn't pass up the opportunity because as much as she wanted to be a singer, she wanted an education too. I respected that. But now I find out she really left because of me. I didn't know what that meant. And I certainly didn't know what I was supposed to do with the information.

Nora breezed through the door wearing her workout clothes. Obviously she had been out walking which she did every morning about breakfast. I was envious of that too. I wish I could go out walking. "Morning." I greeted as she opened the fridge to retrieve a bottle of water. She took a long drink and then sat it on the counter.

"Good morning. Where is everyone? "She began cleaning up the mess left over from breakfast. It was a standing order in this house that she did the cleanup. She rarely let anyone help her except Loren. She explained to me once that cleaning up; even such a mundane task as clearing dishes relaxes her. Loren was the same way, according to her mother.

"Loren was gone before I got up and I think Veronica is getting dressed. I don't know about Pop. "

"He went to meet Loren for coffee after her meeting with Kelly. " She supplied nonchalantly as she removed my bowl and dumped the remaining corn flakes into the trash. I didn't say anything else as I watched her whirl around cleaning up after everyone. It amazed me sometimes that she was always in a good mood.

The phone rang and she picked it up as she passed by its perch on her way to the sink with an armload of dishes. "Tate and Duran Residence "She listened for a minute and then smiled my way. " Yes he is." She walked to me and handed me the cordless device. I took it with a smile.

"Hello."

"_Hey mate."_

Ian. I had texted him after my conversation with Loren last night.

"Hey, man. Tell me you can make it tonight?" I really needed him to be at this dinner tonight.

"_What's in it for me?"_

"My company. " I smiled as my best friend scoffed." Have you met Loren's friend Veronica?" Women were a lifeline for Ian and usually the only way to get him to do anything. I felt bad for using Veronica as bait, but she was a beautiful girl and exactly his type. Plus she ¸like women everywhere would undoubtedly fall at his feet.

"_Loren is back?" His voice was suddenly happy. I didn't like it._

"Yes. She came home yesterday for Adrianna's baby shower. She is moving back."

"_She didn't mention that to me the last time we spoke. "_

I did my best to keep my tone light but I felt and uncomfortable tug in my gut at Ian's words. "When was that?"

"_Last month. I had a job up her way. She and her hot as sin roommate took me to dinner. " _

What the hell? He never mentioned that to me. "Are you coming or not?" I couldn't keep the annoyance from my voice and apparently he heard it because he chuckled lightly.

"_Who will be there?"_

Why did that even matter? "I don't know. I guess just the usual. Melissa, Adam, Adrianna, Phil, me, Loren, Veronica. Whoever else Loren wants to catch up with. "

"_No Chloe?"_

Well damn. I hadn't even thought about inviting her. Loren and Chloe don't get along that was obvious from my conversation last night with Loren. And Melissa always spent more time glaring at her than even talking when she was in the same room with Chloe. So it's not a good idea to invite her. If I did, there was no doubt in my mind that Loren would clam up on me again. I wouldn't let that happen. "No Chloe. " It should probably worry me that the choice to exclude the person I love was so easy.

"_Then count me in. "_

"because Chloe isn't coming, you are?" Now that I thought about it, every time I invited Ian somewhere he would ask me if Chloe would be there. If she was, he was busy. What the hell?

"_Chloe and I have issues. "_

"Since when?"

"Since she isn't even a real person, mate. She is someone that a bored little girl made up because she was ashamed that her mum wasn't rolling in dough. "

Ian and Chloe have known each other for years and never once did Ian say a bad word about her. No all of a sudden, she wasn't good enough. Stuff like this was the reason I question so much about my life now. The reason I am so confused. "Be here around six. " I didn't wait for his response and hung up the phone. Anger once again hummed in my body. This time I didn't try to contain it. I threw the phone down on the table with a growl. Nora looked up from where she was stacking dishes in the dishwasher. "Sorry," I grumped.

"You ok?"

"Apparently Ian and Loren are great friends and he hates Chloe."

Nora closed the appliance and made her way to stand beside me," Ian and Loren became close while you were in the hospital. They were both so worried about you, neither left your side unless Max and I forced them to. I can't speak for why he doesn't like Chloe but I will tell you that the person she is in front of you isn't who she is in front of the rest of us when you aren't around. That's personally why I dislike her. "

"What do you mean?"

Nora sat down in the chair next to me. "Remember Adam's birthday party a couple months ago? "At my nod she continued, "every time you left the room to use the restroom of get some air, Chloe took the opportunity to belittle all the decorations or food. Mel worked hard on that party and Chloe undermined it all. Her snide little remarks hurt Mel's feeling and you know that's saying a lot because Mel can usually hold her own but she takes it out of loyalty to you. Mel cares about you and you care about Chloe so she just kept her mouth closed and let it roll off her back. "

This was definitely saying a lot because Melissa Sanders was one of the most feisty chicks I have ever met. It was one of the reasons why I liked Mel so much. She had no qualms about telling people like it is. "I thought Adam's party was a lot of fun. " Mel had chosen to give Adam a childlike Transformers party simply because it had been her boyfriend's favorite cartoon back in his younger years. Though I am a few years older than Adam, it had been my favorite as well and the trip to the past was one of the best times I have had since I woke up.

"It was. Your dad and I had such a great time. So did Lo and she used to hate the Transformers "Nora let out a small laugh. " But the point is that Chloe is constantly making Mel, Loren, and the others feel like dirt behind your back. Especially Loren. " I saw Nora's protective mom instincts take over as her eyes narrowed, " I don't know Chloe as well as the others but I do not appreciate her treating my daughter badly. "

I sure don't appreciate it either, now that I know about it anyway. It added to my anger that my friends and family felt they had to tiptoe around my girlfriend. And the fact that Chloe makes the people I care about miserable added to the confusion I felt about her. It is becoming increasingly clear to me that Chloe isn't the person I always thought she was. "I will talk to her, Nora. She won't be talking down to Mel or Loren again. "

Nora places a hand over mine and squeezes slightly. "I appreciate that. Just don't tell the girls I said anything, ok? Loren will have a tantrum. "

"Why does Loren not want me to know about things Nora? She freaked out a little last night when Pop mentioned my birthday dinner." Obviously something substantial had happened that night because before she turned glaring brown eyes my pop's way, pink tinged her cheeks. I noticed but kept the observation to myself. That and the overwhelming need to know exactly what Loren and I were doing at the bungalow together for a weekend. Pop's mention of that had Loren blushing as well.

Nora sighed, "Look sweetie, your dad and I don't necessarily agree with the way Loren is handling things but we love her and we respect her choices."

Choices about what exactly? "Loren and I were friends, right? Before my accident? That's what everyone keeps saying."

"You were. The two of you spent a lot of time together." She pulled her hand away and busied herself with a loose placemat thread, no longer meeting my eyes. "You were always so nice to my girl. Never made her feel like a burden or just a silly contest winner. You made her believe in herself and her talent. I will always be grateful to you for that. I always worried that she was getting in over her head. "

I sat there silently for a minute. Knowing what I wanted to ask but unsure if I would get an honest answer or a Loren dictated one. Apparently the younger of the Tate women was running the show here. Finally I just closed my eyes and opened my mouth. "In over her head with the business or me, Nora?"

I heard the older woman sigh and opened my eyes. She was looking at me again. "Both, but mostly you." And just like Veronica, Nora got up from the table and disappeared from the room. The women in Loren's life were experts at dropping bombshells on me and then running away. Just like Loren.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

After finally pulling myself away from the kitchen and getting myself showered and dressed, I sat in the living room waiting for Jake to arrive for our weekly status meeting. Before the accident, Jake's office downtown had practically been my second home, but now my manager/agent came to me if at all possible. I wasn't a fan of leaving the house. Leaving the house meant facing the public which meant facing the media. The last thing I wanted was for a picture of me to end up on the cover of People magazine. Or worse, the cover of a trashy tabloid. If I didn't have to leave the house I didn't. If I did, well, then my face was all over the news. I really hated my life sometimes.

My phone chirped and I pulled it out of my pocket, surprised to see I had two new text messages. The first was from Chloe. She had called when I was getting dressed but I hadn't felt like dealing with her right then. Or now even. After learning about Loren's promise to stay away from me and then her bad treatment of my friends, I didn't have much nice to say to her. Nonetheless, I would have to deal with her sooner or later. I clicked open the message from her. _**Hey baby. Just reminding you of our lunch date. I am picking up food from Angelo's and I will be there in a little while. Love you.**_I quickly typed back _**ok**_ and deleted the message. I had forgotten about our date but she was already on her way so I may as well just deal with it.

The next message was from Loren. I was surprised to see her name on my phone. I knew I had her number of course. I just never used it and she never used mine. Until now, apparently. I clicked open her message_**. Eddie, are you sure about this dinner tonight? I just got off the phone with Phil and he said Ade is in a mood…I don't think he means a good one either.**_

I smiled as I replied, because I knew exactly what Adrianna's hormone induced moods were like. _**We just have to keep her away from objects she can throw. Are you busy? Call me. **_

Veronica mentioned she had a meeting with Kelly so she was probably busy but I just wanted to talk to her. I can't even really explain why. To my surprise, my phone rang and her name came up as my incoming call. I answered with a smile, "Hey."

"_Hi. What's wrong?"_

"How do you know something is wrong?"

"_You should grumpy. You ok?"_

I don't know why but her concern made me smile. "Yeah, it's just been a confusing morning and Jake is late for our meeting. "

"_Oh, sorry about that. It's my fault he is late. He was lecturing me. "_

What? "Why"

_I heard her let out a frustrated sigh, "I had a meeting with Kelly earlier and she wants me to do all these shows and when I told her I couldn't commit to them right now, she freaked out. Jake walked in just about then and they ganged up on me." _

I really didn't like the sound of that at all. "Why is it so important for you to do these shows?"

"_It's not so much the shows they are concerned about as much as the impact my class schedule will have on my career. " _

Class schedule? She really is in college. "So you are going back to SDU?" I am sure the disappointment was evident in my voice.

"_No, I am planning to transfer to CU. Apparently Kelly thought my moving back here meant that I was giving up school. She and Jake are not happy with me."_

I felt my anger rising again. Damn Jake and Kelly. "You need to do what is right for you Loren. If going to school makes you happy, then that's what you do. "

"_I love singing and I am grateful for everything I have but if I don't get my degree I am always gonna regret it. Especially if this career doesn't work out. I am only going part time so it's not like I am going to be too busy to do music stuff. I just don't want to have any more regrets. "_

Any more regrets? What exactly did she regret I couldn't help but wonder? I didn't ask though. I knew Loren wouldn't let things slip like Veronica and Nora had. She was much more guarded. "I think it's great. "

"_Really?"_

"Really. "

"_Thank you, Eddie. That means so much to me. " _

Her words made my stomach flutter slightly. That was a weird feeling and one I hadn't ever experienced. "You're welcome."

"_Ok, so about tonight…are you sure?" _

"Are you still worried about Ade?" I couldn't help but laugh a little.

"Yes_. I know she is pregnant and all but I also know how she used to be. This friendship between her and I is knew and could blow up any second. I really don't want her to go back to hating me."_

"Adrianna hated you?"

"_So much. But we are ok now. I just don't want to rock the boat you know. Phil says that she has been screaming at him all morning. She threw a coffee cup, full of coffee, at him. " _

I shouldn't have but I laughed at that. I had witnessed Adrianna's violence in regard to her husband. A couple of weeks ago Phil and I were set up in the living room playing video games while Ade was visiting with Nora and all of a sudden she just started railing at Phil about her getting fat and not fitting in her clothes and shoes. She took off her shoe and through it right at his head. Totally crazy but hilarious at the same time. Those hormones were no joke. "It will be fine. "

"_Are you sure because we already cancelled our plans to decorate the nursery. Phil thinks we should do it another day. "_

"I am sure. It will be fine. I already talked to Ian too. He will be here."

"_Great. Um, what about Chloe?"_

"No. Chloe won't be here."

_I thought I heard Loren let out a nervous breath. "ok."_

"I will call Rumor after my meeting with Jake. "

"_Sounds great. Veronica and I are gonna stock up on junk food_ _for dessert. "_

"Ok." A knock sounded at the door and then Jake walked in. "Hey listen Jake is here so I gotta go. "

"_Sure, I will talk to you later. Bye."_

"Bye." I ended the call and glared at Jake as he sat down on the sofa. "Why are you giving Loren a hard time about going to college?"

Jake shook his head, "back in town for five minutes and she already has you playing pit bull again. "

"What the hell does that mean?"

"Loren can handle her own career, Eddie. She doesn't need you standing up for her."

My glare intensified, "Loren is my friend, I am not gonna let you and Kelly tear down her dreams. "

"No one is tearing down her dreams. In fact, I am pretty sure that we have done nothing but help her achieve those dreams. Loren is the one compromising everything."

I shake my head at him. "She is allowed to want more than one dream to come true, Jake. She wants to have a backup plan. "I don't know why but for some reason talking about Loren having a backup plan gave me a weird feeling in my stomach. I ignored it and concentrated on my conversation with Jake. "Maybe she doesn't want music to consume her like it does the rest of us. "

"She is already dropping the ball Eddie. Other than a few talks shows she hasn't done anything to promote her album. No concerts in San Diego. No radio interviews. No press junkets. Nothing except a couple twitter statuses. "

"Loren is on twitter? I didn't know that." For some reason that seems really important for me to know. I filed the information away for later.

Jake rolled his dark brown eyes at me. "Why does that matter? Let's forget about Loren for a minute and talk about your career. Eduardo, the label isn't happy. "

"So you said yesterday. I can't help it Jake. I am blocked. "Why couldn't anyone understand that? I was beaten to a bloody pulp and put in a coma for months yet everyone just wants me to jump back up and resume life as usual. "Tell me about the song One Day at a Time?"

Jake glared at me this time, "what about it?"

"I want to hear it. "

"I can't believe Loren got you fired up about this again." He pulled some papers out of his brief case along with a stack of CDs which I knew instantly were demos. Other people's demos. "The label passed on that song Eduardo. They didn't like it. There is no need to bring it up again."

"I need to hear it Jake. For me. Please. "

He let out a frustrated sigh, "fine. I will get you a copy of the demo you made. Give me a couple of days. In the meantime, I need you to listen to these." He hands me the demos and I take them. "The guys at the label want enough songs for an album by end of next month. No exceptions. I know you don't want to hear it but it's time to start thinking about recording someone else's songs."

He was right, I knew, but I didn't like it. I have always written my own songs. Until some punk ruined my life. He stole my car, my memory, and my inspiration. I hate him. "I will listen to these. "

"Thank you. " He handed me a sheet of paper, "these are tour dates I set up for you. It's just a couple of small venues around LA. I know you aren't ready to play big arena again and that's fine but you have to get back out there, man. Kelly and I thought maybe Loren could play a couple of shows with you. She could open the night with Mars and another song or two. Get the crowd pumped up for you. What do you think?"

I didn't like it. I wasn't ready to get back out there, to face the world. But my fans have been beyond patient. They deserved some appreciation. "Ok. "

"You still have some time to prep, the dates don't start till the new year. " He put his brief case down on the floor and leaned back in his spot on the sofa. The business portion of our meeting was over. "How are you feeling today?"

"Same as always. "I leaned up and put the items in my hands on the coffee table. " Angry, frustrated, fed up. "

"How does Loren being back make you feel?"

"Confused. " Jake was one of my best friends. I could talk to him about anything. "I have always felt some kind of weird connection to her, but it feels stronger now. I know she and I were friends but it feels like maybe we were more. "Jake's guilty look spoke volumes. " Look, man. I am not asking you to supply me with memories or anything ok. I just can't stop feeling like I am forgetting something incredible. I only feel like that when she is around. "

Jake let out a heavy breath. "I didn't know a lot about you and Loren. I wasn't a big fan of you spending so much time focusing on her rather than yourself. I made my reservations clear, and as usual you did what you wanted. You wanted to spend time with her. And you did. A lot. "

"What about Chloe?"

"Chloe, Cynthia, whoever she is this week is a train wreck, Eddie. I can't say what exactly went on between the two of you, but I do know you were unhappy a lot of the time but when Loren was around, you weren't so much. She kind of brought out a different side of you. She relaxed you. "

"When you say I was unhappy with Chloe, is that because of her mom showing up and all that stuff coming out? "

Jake leaned forward again, "Mostly, but even before then. She was pressuring you to get married, remember that?" I nodded and he continued. "And she wanted you back into acting. "

I remember those things. Chloe had been pressuring me about becoming engaged since six months into our relationship. It's all she wanted until she decided to expand from modeling to acting. The truth was that she wasn't very good at it and was having a hard time breaking into the business. No one wanted to hire her just based on a couple of fashion shows and print ads. I however, had offers pouring in. Television guest spots, movies, soap operas. Jake had offers from every venue but I turned them all down. I didn't really enjoy acting. I tried it with _Senior Ditch Day_ but it didn't really do anything for me. Chloe didn't get that. She wanted me to take jobs in the hopes that I could open some door for her.

"You never said anything but I know that her pressuring you wasn't easy on you."

Sometimes it surprised me that I was so easy to read. Because I was so much in the public eye, I liked to keep things to myself. Or at least I used to. I wonder when that changed. Of course I guess that was just one more thing to add to the list. "It doesn't matter. Acting isn't in my future. For obvious reasons but mostly because I just don't want to do it. If Chloe can't accept it, then that's her problem. "

A look of surprise passed over my friend's face before he quickly covered it, "what's with the attitude today, man? "

"Just been a bad day. But I need to run something by you. "I made a plan last night during my talk with Loren. She wasn't going to come right out and tell me about our time together, that was obvious. No one else would either. So maybe I didn't need her to tell me. Maybe I could remember on my own. But I would need some help. Loren had agreed to be friends with me. It was a start. But I needed more. "I need to spend as much one on one time with Loren as possible. "

"What are you trying to accomplish, Eduardo?" His look was pensive, and I couldn't really blame him. It was crazy for me to be so stubborn about something like this, but every instinct was telling me this thing with Loren needed to be explored. Right or wrong, I had more than a mentor/student relationship or friendship with her. Maybe I had been faithful to Chloe. Maybe I hadn't felt more than friendship. As much as I wanted to believe that was true, my body's reaction to someone who wasn't my girlfriend belied that.

"Obviously you and everyone else in my life took what Dr. Haskins said to heart about feeding me memories. I get it. You don't want to mess with my head. And I believe that Loren has a lot to do with no one being willing to go against that." Again Jake's expression was guilty but I continued in spite of it. "I KNOW something was going on between me and Loren, Jake. I can feel it."

"Eddie…"

"No, don't say anything, ok. I just need you to help me spend as much time with her as I can. I think maybe if I do, something will jog my memory."

"I don't think this is a good idea. What about Chloe? She and Loren hate each other."

I rolled my eyes, "Yes, I know. But why? See, that's another reason I have to do this. If nothing was going on between Loren and I then why does Chloe hate her so much? And why would Loren hate her? It doesn't make sense unless there is more to the story then I am being told. "Somewhere along the way contempt had entered my voice though I didn't mean for it to.

"Ok so say and I am not admitting to anything here, there was something between you and Loren before you lost your memory. Why does it even matter anymore? You don't remember. She moved on. You are with Chloe. Engaged to Chloe. "

I let out a steady breath, "I don't know why it matters, Jake. It just does. I can't let it go. Ever since the first time she was introduced to me, I felt this pull to Loren. And ever since that same day, she has done everything in her power to build up these walls between us. She avoided me, ignored me, whatever she had to do, but it's always there this crazy pull." And it was damn frustrating to be honest. Women didn't leave me so unsettled. Ever. Not even Chloe had done that when I first met her. I saw her, she was beautiful and interested and then we went from there. Loren was different. She just was.

"I don't know what it is you want me to do. "

"Those dates you gave me? I want Loren on every one of them. I want you to set up some rehearsals and some studio time for us to cut some songs together. Remixes of her songs, my songs, whatever. Can you do that?"

For a minute I thought he might turn me town. I watched the uncertainty in his eyes battle with resignation before he finally nodded, "I will see what I can do. "

I smiled triumphantly. "Thank you. "

_**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXX**_

Jake left and I checked the time on my watch. Chloe would arrive any minute for our lunch date. I should feel bad about forgetting about it and for my plan to spend time with time with someone she doesn't like. But I don't. Things have felt off about my relationship with her for a while now. Since I woke up, honestly. I don't get the same heart racing feelings when I kiss her anymore. I don't feel passion like I once did. I thought maybe it was me. I convinced myself that it was just another thing taken away from me. Now, I am not so sure.

A simple touch from Loren Tate made me all tingly. I can't remember ever feeling that sensation with anyone. Ever. Thoughts of her have consumed me constantly since yesterday. I am ashamed to admit Chloe has only crossed my mind a few times in the days since I have last seen her. Once upon a time, she was all I thought about. All I wanted. Now, not so much.

A chirp sounded from my pocket and I pulled my phone out. A smile came instantly as I saw a new text from Loren. _**Think we can forget my underage-ness tonight? I need some alcohol. I promise not to tell you were my supplier! **_

_**What happened?**_ I replied back. From the little I knew about Loren, she was as straight laced as they came. I am pretty sure I even remember Adrianna calling her princess purity in a joking manner a few times when she and Mel were relaying high school stories to me. I am pretty sure drinking isn't the norm for her.

_**Just did something I might regret if my gut feeling about this guy is wrong**__. _

Her response made me frown. An old boyfriend probably. I didn't like that at all. Especially the image of Loren with a faceless guy that was now running through my head. Maybe she didn't have such a bad idea**. **_**I will add a couple bottles of wine to my list to order from Rumor**_**. **

I know supplying alcohol to a bunch of underage people is against the law, but I don't see the harm in a couple of classes of red wine for a celebratory dinner.

_**Thank you! **__**J**__** I am heading to the store to meet V for some serious chocolate shopping. See you soon **__**J**___

I didn't get a chance to answer back because Chloe waltzed in with two big bags of food. I slide my phone back into my pocket and smiled up at her. It didn't reach my eyes, but she didn't seem to notice as she walked over and leaned down to kiss me. I let her. Just like every other time, my heart rate stayed steady. Pulling back, I nodded towards the bags she had deposited on Nora's coffee table. "What did you get?"

She straightened and walked over to the bags pulling a foil wrapped sub out. "Roast beef, your favorite. " It wasn't my favorite, it was hers, but I didn't bother correcting her and took it when she handed it to me. I sat it on my lap and watched as she took the spot on the sofa recently vacated by Jake. She placed straws in two Styrofoam cups and handed one over to me. I took it and lifted it to my lips for a sip. Diet Coke. Also her favorite and not mine. "I drove by here last night on my way back from my shoot, but I didn't stop by because there was a different car in the driveway. Did your dad and Nora have company?"

"That was Veronica's car. "

Chloe's blue eyes widen and then instantly narrowed, "Veronica as in Loren's friend?" I nodded and she frowned. "Why was she here?"

"She and Loren came home for Adrianna's baby shower. " I told her simply taking another sip of my drink.

She angrily opened the foil on her lunch and glared down at it. "You didn't tell me Loren was coming home. "

Her voice was full of distain and I felt my anger once again rising. "I didn't know she was coming Chloe. Nora told me yesterday right before she got here."

"Whatever. Is she gone?"

I shook my head. "She is staying. Veronica too."

She was poised to take a bite of her sub but stopped as my words registered. "What do you mean she is staying?"

"She and Veronica are moving here. They are planning to get their own place but until they find one, they are sharing Loren's room."

Chloe practically threw her sandwich down on the wrapper spread out on her lap, obviously enraged by Loren's plans. "Unbelievable!"

"What is your problem?" I spit the words at her. I didn't really mean to but it was too late to do anything about it now.

"My problem is that I hate that little twit." Her blue eyes were full of anger as she looked at me. "She is obsessed with you Eddie. She used to follow you around like a little puppy dog. She tried to turn you against me, especially when she found out that I lied about my mom. Loren tried to use that to break us up so she could have you for herself. "

That couldn't be true. Loren didn't seem like that kind of manipulative person. "Chloe, Loren is back because she missed her family and her friends, that's it. "

"I think you should move in with me. "

"What?"

"Come on baby, we were practically living together before you got hurt. We are engaged to be married. It makes sense that we live together. "The anger in her eyes was replaced by desperation as she moved closer to me. She took my hand in hers. "I can take care of you baby. We can finally get back to normal."

Back to normal? I don't even know what that is anymore. But whatever it was, it definitely is not moving in with someone I don't even know how I feel about anymore. "Chloe, I cant. " Her pink lips puckered out in a pout. It used to work for her to get me to do whatever she wanted. I couldn't help but wonder if she used it to get me to finally proposed. I shook that thought off as quickly as it entered my mine. I can't believe that she manipulated me like that. I couldn't have been that naive. Could I? "This is my home now. "

She shook her head and her loose blonde hair swished with the movement. "This place, "she looked around with disgust, "is not your home, Eddie. This is temporary until you get back on your feet. The penthouse is your home, our home. "

"I sold the penthouse, Chloe. Two months ago." I hadn't thought to tell her because honestly it wasn't her business. It was my place, my choice. There wasn't any point to hold onto it anymore. Chances were good that I would never return to it. It wasn't my home anymore. This was home now. This place where Nora and my dad lived. Where they made me feel like I belonged, like I was wanted. Even if I did recover completely and didn't want to impose on them anymore, I wouldn't go back to the penthouse. I would find a place in Tarzana. Close to my family.

"I can't believe that you did that without even talking to me first. " She was clearly hurt. I felt bad, but it hadn't occurred to be to talk to her. "I guess we will have to live at my place. "

I should have figured she would make this hard. "I am not moving anywhere Chloe. " I could hear the frustration in my voice already, not that it would matter. Chloe didn't let things go easily. "I like living here. "

She rolled her eyes at me and my annoyance level increased. "How can you possibly like living with your father? You are a grown man; you need to act like one. That includes not living with your parents. "

I kept my voice calm even though I felt anything but on the inside. "Yes, Chloe, I am a grown man. I should be living on my own, but I can't because some punk decided to carjack me. I need help. My pop and Nora provide that. I like staying here and I am staying. Whether you like it or not. "

"You know, "she started tossing her food down on the coffee table and standing up, "I am so sick of your attitude. All you ever do is sit around this place and be angry. You don't go out, you don't work, and you don't do anything." She came to be so she was standing directly in front of me." It's time for you to get on with your life, babe. It's time for us to get on with our life. Let's go out tonight. We can even go to MK if you want."

"I already made plans for tonight. With my friends. "

She glared at me now, "with your friends? What friends? "

"Mel, Phil. The whole gang. We are having dinner here."

I watched as her crystal blues eyes filled with anger. "So your telling me that you are having dinner with Loren Tate and her little high school misfits instead of coming out with me. " The venom in her voice was unmistakable but I found myself not really caring. She had no reason to be angry about anything.

"Those little misfits are my friends , chloe. "

"They are not! They are Loren's friends. I am your friend Eddie. I care about you. They do not. "

I couldn't control my anger now if I wanted to. It was running intensely through my body. I tossed the unopened food she had given me on the coffee table next to hers and set my cup next to it. "They are my friends. Every single one of them. Phil comes over here three nights a week to watch a ball game with me or play video games. Adam takes me to every single one of my physical therapy sessions and stays to make sure I am ok. Mel and Adrianna stop by here every single day to see how I am and to just hang out. They care about me, Chloe. And I care about them."

"You didn't even know they existed until that dreadful twit one won your stupid contest. Ever since then you have surrounded yourself with these unworthy little children. I am sick of it. "

I used the control of my chair to back up a couple of paces and glared at the unfamiliar version of Chloe in front of me. I didn't even want to deal with this right now. " I am done with chloe. Thanks for lunch but I lost my appepite. I am busy tonight. I will call you tomorrow. Show yourself out. " Without another look, I hit the forward motion control on my chair a and left the livingroom.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX X**

The anger I felt at Chloe felt like it could choke me as I made my way to my bedroom and slammed the door closed behind me. Just in case she was foolish enough to think about coming back here to continue your insults, I flipped the lock to keep her out.

The room wasn't much but it was mine and I loved it. The dark blues and blacks that made up the theme matched my mood most days. Most of the furniture, consisting of my desk, bed, and dresser had come from my room at the penthouse. The bed sat in the center with the dresser on the left side of the room nestled between two closets. The dark oak nightstands on either side of the bed had come from Pop. A welcome present when I first moved in. Silly, maybe, but I still loved them. I placed my favorite picture of mom, Pop and I on the left one along with a lamp and a dock that help my cell phone and iPod when I didn't have them with me. On the other stand was a cd player, the remote for the plasma television that was mounted above my dresser and a copy of the latest James Patterson novel. The dark blue walls were covered in posters of my favorite bands, including my parents. There was one of me too. Mel had insisted on hanging it when she helped to hand the others. She was a stubborn one, my friend. And contrary to what Chloe believed, Melissa Sanders was indeed my friend.

My dresser housed a Blu-ray player and various movies as well as a stack of my favorite CDs, including Loren Tate's debut album. On the right side of the room, directly opposite my dresser sat my desk. My laptop sat in the center of the oversized monstrosity with far too many drawers and shelves, but it had been my mother's and I loved it. I made my way to the desk and moved my finger over the mouse pad causing the machine to wake from its slumber. I clicked on the internet logo pulled my list of favorites down. Choosing Twitter from the ever growing list, I watched as my page automatically loaded. I used the keyboard to type _Loren Tate_ into the search bar and waited as the list of results loaded. The blue check verifying the user account was the first thing I saw. The second thing I saw had my heart racing and my jaw dropping in shock. Loren Tate was Luv2LuvU!

_**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**_

_**Max**_

I knew before Loren even walked into the club that she was angry at me. I had known it last night. The thin was that as much as I love Loren, and I do love her. I didn't condone her little plan anymore. I couldn't because the chances of Eddie ever regaining his memory were slim to none. I had no doubt he would walk again, but he wouldn't remember. And he deserved to know the truth, all of it.

I stood up and held out a chair for Loren as she wordlessly walked up to the small round table I was occupying. She sat and I moved to sit across from her, pushing a cup of coffee her way. "Thanks for coming."

"Did you think I wouldn't?" She asked sincerely as she took a small sip of the hot liquid.

" I know you aren't happy with me so yes, I wondered if you would come. "

That made her frown,

"As mad as I am, and I am, I will always hear you out, Max. Always. "

I smiled my appreciation but then plunged in to what I had no doubt would be a difficult discussion. " I cant apologize for what I did, Loren. I want Eddie to know what he shared with you. "

" Max we agreed…"

" I know we did, but now I changed my mind. Loren, you and I both know if he hasn't remembered by now he isn't going to. "

To my surprise she nodded. All these months I thought she had been holding on to the hope that one day my son would wake up and remember how much he loved her. And he did love her, whether she wants to believe that or not. "I do know that. I lost hope about a month after he woke up. "

I reached across the table and took her hand in mine, "Eddie deserves to know what he can't remember. That he was finally free of Chloe and so crazy about you, why don't you want him to know?"

She shrugged," Because he loves her Max. He always has. You may not like it but it's a fact we have to face. He was devastated by her betrayal, remember?"

Of course I remembered. I knew that Chloe wasn't what she seemed and I tried to warn my son, but he hadn't wanted to hear it. And when he finally did figure her out, it destroyed him. He had loved Chloe Carter, but what he loved hadn't been real. It had been a made up figment of Cynthia Kowalski's imagination. "Yes, but I also remember a little brunette with the voice of an angel that helped him get over it. "

"Did I? Or was I just a distraction, just like Jake always said?"

Jake said what? That guy really grated on my nerves sometimes. Eddie's friend or not, I really just wanted to introduce him to my right hook. "You were far more than that, sweetheart. "

"Maybe."

"No maybe about it Loren. Eddie loved you. "

Her brown eyes were full of sadness and pain when they looked at me, "He never told you or me, for that matter, so how can you possibly know that, Max?"

"Because I am his father and I know him better than anyone else. Because I know what it is like to look at someone with so much love that it almost knocks you on your butt. I looked at Katy like that. I look at your mom like that. And my dear, Eddie looked at you like that." He didn't have to say the words for them to be true. I was there from the beginning. I saw the ways his eyes light up when he heard Loren's voice for the first time listening to her contest entry in my apartment and realized that she had been the person with whom he had been commuting with on some sort of social media site for months prior to that. I saw the way his gaze lingered on her for just a little longer than necessary when she busted through the doors of this very club the night she was supposed to sing her entry but was late. I saw the way he always felt the need to touch her when they were around each other, even before things between went to hell with him and Chloe. I saw the way he was so conflicted after his birthday dinner when he kissed her for the very first time. And most importantly I saw the look in his eyes when he came back from my bungalow, no longer conflicted about his music or his personal life. No, my son knew what he wanted and it was the beautiful, stubborn girl sitting right in front of me. "I promise you, Loren, Eddie loved you. I believe that he still does. "

She shook her head, "No he doesn't. If he ever did, he doesn't anymore. I saw the engagement ring on Chloe's finger at Phil and Adrianna's wedding. They picked up right where they left off. "

"No, they didn't. Eddie didn't put that ring back on her finger. She did. She told him they were engaged before the accident. The media crap he read online confirmed that so he just goes with it. "And nothing irritated me more. Chloe spews lie after lie and because it's in a magazine or on a gossip site, he just believes it. More than anything I wish that Eddie and Loren had gone public with their relationship. Instead, just a few pictures of them in compromising positions that can easily be explained away exist. And miraculously there is no longer a single compromising picture of Chloe and Tyler Roark any damn where.

"whatever it doesn't matter. Eddie and I talked last night. We are going to be friends. I am not going to run away from him anymore. "She glared at my smile, "but I am also not going to complicate his life without information about a time he can't remember. I slipped up and mentioned _One Day at a Time_ to him. But I am back in control now. Please, Max, no more trips down memory lane. Just let it go. "

I leaned back in my chair and folded my arms across my chest. "Do you still love him?"

She sighed, "why does that matter?"

"Because it does. Do you?"

She wouldn't lie to me, I know. Loren was probably the most honest person I know, aside from her mother that is, and lying wasn't a part of her personality. She wouldn't even call keeping such important information from my son lying. "Yes, I still love him. "

I knew that of course but I had to make her say it out loud. I wasn't really even sure why but I needed the confirmation. "Then why won't you fight for him?"

"It's not that simple Max. I know you and everyone else believes it is, but it's not. I don't want to have to fight for Eddie's love. I want it because it's what I deserve. I want him to love me because he can't live without me. I don't want it because he feels some sort of obligation to me because of a relationship he doesn't even remember." She pushed a lock of brown hair behind her ears. "He asked for Chloe, Max. He wants her. He loves _her."_

I hated hearing the words as much as she hated saying them and we both winced. I couldn't fight her on the facts because that's exactly what they were. Eddie had asked for Chloe. He stayed with her even after finding out about her lies, well some of her lies. He didn't know about Tyler. Or the fact that I suspect she was the one driving the car that killed his mother. Of course no one knew that except Nora. " I want you with him, Loren."

"I want that too, Max. But it's never going to happen, ok. We both have to accept that. I need to move on with my life. I can't stay stuck in my memories of Eddie forever."

Oh dear God. She means move on from Eddie, with some other guy. The mere thought made my stomach hurt. "Is there someone else?"

She shook her head sadly. "No, but maybe someday there will be. And I need to be able to have an open heart when that happens. I don't want to spend my life alone, wondering what if."

Of course, I didn't want that either. This young woman sitting across from me was much more than my son's girlfriend or ex-girlfriend as the case may be. She was much more than my own girlfriend's daughter too. She in all her baseball cap, yoga pants and sweatshirt glory was my daughter. That's how I felt, as weird as it was, or as scandalously incestuous. I loved Loren as if she was my own. As much as I worried about Eddie's happiness, I worried about hers as well. I wanted her to be happy even if that meant with someone other than my son. "I don't want that for you either."

This time she reached out and touched my hands as I leaned forward and placed them on the table. "I love Eddie forever, Max. I don't doubt that. He was my first love. But it wasn't meant to be for him and I. Maybe he and I only met so that you and my mom could. "I smiled at that. " You and my mom were definitely meant to be and I will forever be grateful that she walked in here that day to give you my song. Both of our lives changed that day. "

My life had too. The second I laid eyes on Nora Tate, I was in love. Same as I had been with Katy. I am one of the few people in this world that gets to experience true love not only once but twice. For that I am truly blessed. I just wished my son could remember the one time he had experienced such a blessing. " I will try to let it go. "

"Thank you. I know you don't agree with my choice, but if Eddie ever does, by some miracle, remember, I want the memories to be clear and concise, not from some information that was thrown at him. And I want him not remember the feelings associated to those memories, not what he was told he felt. "I couldn't really blame her for that. " I just want us to let the past where it is. I can be friends with Eddie if we all agree to let it all go."

As much as I hated it, I knew that I had to do this for her. "Ok, I promise to not bring up unmentionable stuff again. "

She smiled, "Thank you, Max. You do know that Eddie isn't the only Duran that found a place in my heart right?"

I smiled back at her, "Just like your mother isn't the only Tate that found a place in mine. " Standing up, I pulled Loren up too and enveloped her in my arms. She was truly the most amazing kid, besides my own, I have ever known. Katy would have agreed with me that she is the only one suitable enough for our son.

No sooner had Loren left out the back door, my cell phone rang. I checked the caller Id and smiled as I answered, "Hey son. You ok?"

"_I am fine. I need a favor." He sounded completely distracted and I didn't have to ask why. Its wasn't a far leap to guess Loren was on his mind. Good._

"Anything."

"_Do you think maybe you and Nora can maybe go away for a couple of days. " Ok, I wasn't expecting that. _

"Nora already told me we have to be absent tonight because you and Loren are having a party. We are gonna have dinner here and then go to a movie after I close up. "

"Pop_, I need more than just tonight. I need to spend some alone time with Loren. Look, I found something out, something major, and I really just need some time with her."_

"What about Veronica?"

"_I called her already and she said it was probably a good idea to go visit her dad. Please, Pop." He actually sounded sort of desperate. What on earth was my boy up to?_

"Ok. It has been awhile since we went to the bungalow. We will leave tonight after I close up here."

_He let out a relieved breath. "Thanks Pop. " _

He hung up immediately before I could even ask why exactly he needed this time or what he had found out. I could only hope it was something that would not only reunite him with Loren but would once and for all get Chloe out of his life.

_**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XX**_

_**Nora**_

As I looked around the small table, I was suddenly struck by just how lucky my daughter was to have so many people that cared about her. Phil, Adrianna, Ian, Mel and Veronica had their heads together plotting against my only child but I couldn't be more proud. Slightly nervous but proud. These people loved Loren just as much as I did, and wanted her to be happy above all else. That's why we were here, in Mel's kitchen conspiring to get Eddie and Loren as much time together as possible. If he couldn't remember falling in love with her the first time, we were all determined to make sure he would fall again. Head over heels this time. Not that he hadn't before…he just hadn't mentioned it if he had. This was honestly the hardest part of the whole tragic situation. We all assumed Eddie felt love for Loren but no one really knew for sure. There would be no doubt about it this time. I headed back to the table and refilled everyone's cup with the iced tea I had made earlier before setting the pitcher in the middle of the table and reclaiming my seat next to Ian who was opening flirting with Veronica and Melissa in tandem.

"I may have accidently let it slip to Eddie that Loren moved to San Diego to get away from him. "Veronica stated with a satisfied smile. The young woman was new to the group but no doubt about it, she cared as deeply as the rest about my daughter's happiness. I would bet that Veronica knew a lot more about heartbreak than everyone else. Not just because she was a year older than the others but because Veronica was nursing her own pain.

"Fabulous, "Mel exclaimed. " Remember though tonight do not refer to anything Leddie related at dinner. "

"Leddie?" I couldn't help but ask. Mel had a language all her own sometimes.

"Loren and Eddie. It's their acronym. You know like Bennifer or Bradelina?" I nodded my head. It was a celebratory thing apparently. And my girl was one of those now. I was overwhelming proud that Loren was following her dreams and being successful at it. Though I would always worried. That was my job after all. "Anyway, just keep with the present tense tonight if at all possible. "

"What about the games, "Adrianna asked with a confused look. " I never is totally a game we need to play but involves the past."

"Yes but Eddie won't need to know that Loren is taking a drink because of something she did with him, "Mel explained. " V and I are planning to strictly concentrate our questions on Leddie. "She had a devious look in her brown eyes and I was suddenly very glad I would be at MK with Max tonight.

"So planning all these games from junior high is supposed to magically make Eddie and Loren fall in love?" Phil asked with clear apprehension in his voice and on his face.

Mel shook her head, "of course not, but it's a step in the right direction. You were on that patio last night, brother; you saw the intense looks Eddie was giving our girl. Memory or no memory, he is interested. We are just giving them a little push in the right direction."

"Lo is gonna be pissed. " He pointed out what we all knew but didn't really care about. Well, maybe I cared. I didn't want Loren mad at me, but more than that I didn't want her unhappy anymore. I wanted the sparkle that Eddie Duran put there, back in my daughter's eyes.

"She will get over it, "Mel said assuredly. " Fate brought them together the first time but we can't wait for it to work its magic again. "

Ian nodded, "And no way in hell can we let Eddie actually married Chloe or whoever she is. "

Echoes of agreement were voiced around the table.

"Loren was miserable in San Diego, "Veronica said looking at Phil. "Distance didn't do anything to ease her hurt. Neither is time. I get the reasons she doesn't want Eddie to be told the truth about their relationship, I really do, but she can't go on avoiding his existence. It's too much for her." She blew out a breath strong enough for the bangs on her forehead to move, "She still loves him and it kills her not to have him in her life. Being his friend is never going to be enough, we all know that. But she believes it is. "The blonde turned to Mel with her blue eyes dancing, "and friends play party games. "

"And friends flirt with other friends, "Ian declared after a sip of his drink. " Nothing will get my mate to show his true interest like a little bit of jealousy." He shared a look with Phil that I just didn't trust in the least. Ian flirting with Loren wouldn't end well. I just felt it. But the kids meant well and more than anything I wanted this plan to work.

Did it make me a bad mother to interfere in my daughter's life and plot with her well-meaning friends? Perhaps. But didn't it make me a good mom that I wanted her to be happy above all else and clearly Eddie Duran was the only person who was truly able to give that to her.

"What do you think Nora? A little harmless flirting to kick Eddie's butt in gear is in order right? "Mel asked me with wide excited brown eyes.

Mel was basically my second daughter, in my heart at least and if there was any one else in this room whose love for Loren rivaled my own, it was Melissa. She and Loren have been practically conjoined at the hip since grade school. She was risking the same wrath as I was here by meddling in Loren's life. She clearly thought Ian had a good idea. "What exactly is your plan, Ian?"

He smiled devilishly. I had a feeling many young ladies were far from immune from that particular smile. I know that if it was twenty years ago and I wasn't head over heels in love already, I would be in that undoubtedly large number. "Well, the gang here is positive that Eddie is not only interested but frustratingly so based on his tension and longing looks. I know my mate better than anyone and if he is indeed interested in Loren, girlfriend or no girlfriend, he will not take kindly to me showing interest. What with my playboy ways and all. "He sent a sink my way. Seriously the boy had charisma in spades.

"Just make sure Loren isn't hurt in anyway. " How could I not agree? My sweet daughter deserved all the happiness in the world, but a little bit of fun wouldn't hurt her in the least. Ian flirting with her would be fun and probably go a long way towards restoring some of the self-esteem that horrid Chloe Carter had stolen.

"I should probably mention also, that, Eddie asked me to make myself scarce for a couple of days. " Veronica threw out to the room which caused a unanimous act of eyebrows rising. The blonde shrugged her shoulders. "I have no idea why. He called while I was driving over here and said that he really just needed to spend some one on one time with Lo. I suggested that I would go to Neptune after dinner tonight and spend some time with my dad. "

I reached across the table and placed a comforting hand on another girl I thought of as a daughter. "Are you sure about that? I know you have a lot of apprehension about spending time in town with Logan."

Veronica nodded, "Yeah, I do, but Loren needs this time with Eddie, Nora. If she has no choice but to face him, maybe it will break down some of those walls of hers. "

Mel cleared her throat, "Look V, you should just stay with me. I have the extra room and we all know you don't want to deal your past any more than Lo does."

Adrianna nodded her agreement, "Yeah, you should totally stay with Mel. "

Apparently Ade and Mel were privy to the same information as she was regarding Veronica and the boy who broke her heart. It made me happy because I knew, from a few well intentioned calls to Keith Mars after our daughter started living together, that Veronica had a rough time in high school and didn't have many people she could rely on when it came to friends. It warmed my heart that not only did my daughter change that but also her friends. These kids were truly amazing.

Veronica nodded happily, "Thanks Mel. I think I will take you up on that offer. "

I wanted to voice my concerns because Mel really didn't live in the safest of neighborhoods, but I bit my tongue. Luckily my cell chirped with an incoming text before I could do any real damage to my tongue. I pulled it out and glanced at the screen. I couldn't help the smile as I read the message from Max silently before reading it aloud to my fellow conspirators. _"Eddie needs us to disappear for a couple days. We leave for the beach tonight."_

"What is he up to?" Phil voiced the question on everyone's mind.

"Who cares? " Mel exclaimed happily. "Obviously it's something good. This is what we want right? Now we have Eddie on our team too. God I love it when my plans come together so perfectly. "

Things did seem to be progressing in the right direction. Even if Eddie never remember what he and Loren shared, he obviously felt some sort of connection to her. Enough of one for him to be so focused on her not shutting herself off from him anymore. So many things could go wrong, but as I looked around the table once more I was assured that this group would fight to the death to make what they wanted to happen, happen.

Even Adrianna who spent the better part of her school days hating Loren, for reasons that Adrianna herself couldn't even explain was in on this. When she had called me earlier to meet her and the other for an "important "meeting, I worried. Mostly because it's my first instinct and partly because sometimes it still amazed me how much the young mother to be has changed. But when she explained that she had Phil make up an excuse for Loren so that we could all meet and discuss how to get Loren and Eddie back together, I felt a part of my heart go out to Adrianna as well. She wanted Loren to be as happy with Eddie as she was with Phil. Love really did have a funny way of bringing people together. Life was truly amazing and with a confidence I wasn't aware I had, I knew my Loren would be happy again.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

_**Loren**_

How was it possible that I even woke up in a good mood this morning? I mean, I know I did. I can clearly remember standing in front of my bathroom mirror after my shower, happily humming the chorus of my new single as I applied my make-up. I was looking forward to hanging out with my friends and getting ready for Adrianna's baby's arrival. And I was especially looking forward to dinner with everyone tonight. Especially Eddie.

After our talk last night, well early this morning really, I went to bed feeling better than I have in a long time. No, we didn't really solve anything. I still love him as much as ever and he doesn't have a clue, or a single memory of it, but somehow things were better. We had agreed to be friends. I could do that. I had to. It would put Eddie back in my life and if I am being completely honest that's what I need. Eddie in my life again. Even if only as my friend.

Being around him would still be hard, I had no illusions that it wouldn't be. I would still get all tingly when he touches me and my heart would no doubt practically beat out of my chest when he innocently throws that sexy smile of his around. But all of that could be, and would be, ignored because Eddie and I did friendship well. That's how we started in the first place. Even before the contest. We were sort of already friend. If you counted the communication we had on twitter, and of course I do count it.

My positive thinking and good spirits remained even after the summoning call from Kelly. I arrived at her office at the requested ungodly hour and despite her urgency that I agree to her proposed tour schedule I was able to tell her about my plans to transfer my class credits from SDU to UCLA. Even after her insistence that my career come before any other ideas I might have for my future my good mood fueled my ability to stand up for myself by telling her quitting school isn't an option for me and that not only would I be continuing my plans but I would work my tour schedule around my class schedule.

Kelly, of course, didn't want to hear it so she called in reinforcements, but even Jake hadn't been able to persuade me to give up my secondary dream of getting my law degree. Both had been surprised that I held my ground. I wasn't willing to concede to their ideas of what my main objective in life should be. Being a singer and songwriter is my dream and I am beyond grateful that I am able to fulfill it, but I have other dreams as well and I refuse to give those up.

In the end Jake had departed for a meeting with Eddie, but not after reminding me that a lack of focus would ultimately result in the end of my music career. He was trying to scare me, but it didn't work. Kelly wasn't thrilled but she had agreed to support me and my desire to attend college and I had agreed to a light course load so I would have time to promote my album the way they wanted. Compromise at its finest.

Even an intensely emotional conversation with Max hadn't put me in a bad mood. Even though I had been angry with him for his antics regarding my relationship with Eddie. We seemed to come to an understanding. I hope anyway. Either way, it's clear that Max's intentions were not to hurt me. He was as frustrated as anyone with the situation. His inclination to meddle , though annoying, just proved that he cared about me and Eddie.

I was still in a fairly happy mood when I arrived at Aroma to get a much needed jolt of caffeine before my next meeting. A phone call from Phil on the way over here telling me that Adriana was experiencing an intense bout of hormones halted our day of nursery decorating. After a quick text and phone call from Eddie, wondering if we should cancel tonight in order to avoid Adrianna mood swings assured me that dinner was still a good idea. And I was still looking forward to it. Excited about it actually, especially when I was assured Chloe Carter wouldn't be hanging all over Eddie.

After a quick thanks to the girl who prepared my cappuccino, I headed to a table in the back corner of the café I had spent most of my teen years working in. For a job it had been pretty amazing. Great tips, friendly co-workers and all the coffee and chocolate shakes a girl could ask for. Sometimes I missed it, but most times I was happy I didn't have to worry about money so much anymore. My scholarship easily paid for school. Even though the original plan had been Brown, it didn't proud to be too difficult to change to SDU and probably not to UCLA first thing Monday. My sign on bonus from the label and proceeded paychecks were tucked safely away in a saving account except the small portion of each that I deposit into my checking account to get me through everyday expenses.

"Loren?" The questioning voice brought me out of my thoughts and I looked up into a pair of nervous brown eyes. I nodded once and motioned for my guest to sit across from me. He did and immediately started playing with a loose packet of sugar that had been lying in front of his seat. "I was surprised to get a call from you. "

"Honestly I was surprised to even be making the call. I don't make it a habit to meddle. "Especially because I hate it so much when people do it in my life.

"How is she?" Her voice was low but I heard the question and the nervous tone which carried it.

"Good. Happy. " Ok, so that was a dig and a complete untruth but the guy in front of me deserved to suffer a little.

Logan Echolls shifted uncomfortably on the black vinyl seat of the booth. "Still with Piz?"

"On paper. But she hasn't seen him for a couple of weeks now. It doesn't seem to be bothering her much." Piz was the nickname of Veronica's boyfriend in Neptune. I am sure at one point I was told his real name but for the life of me, I can't remember it now. "We got here yesterday and she drove up to see her dad for a couple of hours, but to my knowledge she didn't see her boyfriend. Isn't that interesting?"

To his credit, Logan only slightly smirked at that little nugget of information. "Well she didn't exactly come knocking on my door either. "

"Would you expect her to? No telling who she would find you with." My words were clipped and had the desired effect as Logan visibly flinched.

"Low blow, Loren Tate. "

It was, and usually I wasn't the kind of person to be so mean, but this guy had taken Veronica's heart and trampled all over it. My protectiveness was out in full force and maybe my inner bitch, whom I didn't know even existed was making an appearance. "Am I wrong? Are you not hooking up with random people every night?"

"You are wrong. I haven't slept with anyone since Veronica. "

"Not even Parker? " Parker was Veronica's friend. Was being the operative word, of course. Logan and Veronica had barely broken up before the girl had started dating V's ex. Apparently she wasn't ever much of a friend though because she was quick to cross that unsaid, invisible line between friends.

Logan shook his head, "Parker and I never slept together. " I believed him. The look of complete honesty in his eyes made it impossible not to.

"But you did sleep with the girl who made Veronica's life a living hell in high school, though didn't you?" I spat the words across the table at him. Anger for my friend evident in my voice. Again Logan flinched.

"Why did you ask me to meet you here, Loren? To rub my face in the stupidest thing I have ever done? To remind me that Veronica is much better off and happier with that damn boy scout than when she was with me? What are you gonna do next, huh, rake me over the coals for using the dweeb's face as my personal punching bag?" His face was red with what could only be anger and his voice betrayed his complete disgust and regret.

I sighed and took a sip of my cappuccino before saying, "Actually, I get what you beat Piz up. V told me about the sex tape and the mob guy and all that. I was actually a little bit impressed when she told me that not only did you wipe the floor with the guy who actually made the tape, but you also apologized to Piz. V was impressed too. "

Logan snorted, "right. That explains why I haven't seen her since that day. "The pain in his eyes was clear and I felt my heart constrict a little for the guy. " She didn't even say goodbye before she left on her internship and she never came back to school. I hate to hear about her moving to San Diego from her dad."

I knew she never said goodbye. She confided that to be the same night I confided to her that I never said goodbye to Eddie. V and I sure were two peas in a pod when it came to matters of the heart. "She had to make a choice about the San Diego position immediately after her job at the FBI headquarters in Virginia ended. She didn't come back to see her dad or anyone else either. "That didn't sate the look in his eyes. " Look Logan, if you think Veronica has had an easy time cutting you out of her life, you are crazy. But it's something she felts she had to do. "

He nodded, sullenly. "I gave up any place I had in her life when I told her the truth about Madison." He stopped spinning the sugar packet around and around in his hand and threw it down on the table. "We were broken up when I did it, but I knew if she ever found out about Madison and me, it would mean the end of us forever. I mean Madison is the one who gave her the drink the night…" He broke off and looked at me unsure. No doubt wondering if I knew the whole story.

"The night she was raped. " I supplied." A couple of weeks after V and I moved into our apartment we had a couple too many glasses of wine with dinner and both of us got very chatty. "That was pretty much the night our friends forever status was carved in stone. We knew way too much about each other to ever be anything less.

Logan nodded slowly, resigned. "She will never forgive me because of that. " He was right. It would be near impossible for Veronica to ever forget the image of the guy she loved, still loves, being that intimate with the girl she hates most in the world. She would never forget for sure but maybe she would find a way to forgive him.

"She won't ever forget Logan. But maybe she can learn to trust you again. Even if only as a friend. "The hopeful look in his eyes made me eager to continue my plan. I had a hunch that Logan was just as much in love with Veronica as she was with him. She could deny it until pigs grew wings but I knew just as sure as I loved Eddie. She missed having Logan in her life, she had flat out told me so numerous times. Maybe they would never be a couple again, though everything in me felt that they would find a way to be, but at least they could be friends. With a little help from me. "We are having a little dinner party tonight at my house. " I pulled a folded up slip of paper out of the pocket of my hoodie and slide it across the table to him. "That's my address. I am inviting you to join us. "

"Veronica doesn't know. " It was a statement not a question.

I shook my head, "No, and I am sure I will hear her wrath but I am doing this because I know what it's like to miss someone but pretend like you don't. To build up walls so high that person has absolutely no chance of ever scaling it no matter how much I might want them too. It sucks, but in my case there is just no other choice. Veronica has a choice; she is just too scared to make it."

"So you are making it for her?" He gave me a full smile this time and I could instantly see why Veronica have been attracted to him. Logan Echolls was insanely gorgeous. Not to Eddie Duran standards of course but gorgeous all the same.

"At the risk of her hating me, yes I am. " I felt my heart ache a little at the fact that there was a very real possibility that Veronica wouldn't like what I am doing. But I pushed the thought and feeling away as I focused my attention on the guy across from me. "I hate you for hurting her, but at the same time, I respect you because I know, deep down I know, that you didn't do it on purpose. You are the type of guy that buries his pain in booze and women; you did that when you thought Veronica was out of your life. "

"How do you know what kind of guy I am? You don't even know me."

"I told you that wine makes Veronica chatty. I know all about you. Well between that and the Google search I did on you. "I flashed him my best smile when he rolled his eyes. " The media sure loves you."

His expression turned grim, "all thanks to make murdering movie star father." Obviously I hit a nerve, though I hadn't meant too. I knew the story of how Logan's father had bedded his son's girlfriend and then later murdered her when she threatened to expose their affair. Everyone in California knew.

"Sorry."

"It's ok."

"I really do think you should come tonight. I know you won't know anyone except Veronica and well, me now, but our friends are great. Oh and Eddie Duran will be there."

"That would sweeten the pot if I was a teenage girl." He joked before sliding the paper with my address into the pocket of his button up shirt. "The fact that Veronica will be there is enough for me, but maybe if I have a good time, I can sell my tales of palling around with Pop Princess Loren Tate to Entertainment Tonight. "He shot me a wink and stood up. "See you tonight." I watched him leave with dueling emotions of excitement and trepidation.

_**XXXXXXXXXXXX**_

After Logan left me alone at the café, I called Veronica to cement our plans to go shopping for tonight's dessert. I still have a half an hour before I was due to meet her at the grocery store down the block from my house so I ordered lunch and while I was waiting I shot Eddie a quick text about adding alcohol to tonight's menu.

I am not a big drinker, mostly because I am underage, but I have enjoyed wine on occasion and considered myself a big fan of it. When Eddie to supply wine, I felt relieved. Tonight was probably not going to go smoothly once Logan arrived and liquid courage would do us all some good. Especially me. Veronica would be mad. Of that I was positive. She wouldn't like me meddling just as I wouldn't like it if she was doing the same. But the idea to invite Logan came to me while I was showering this morning and I could seem to let it go. Agreeing to be friends with Eddie left me with a peace I thought I would never find. We might never be a couple again, but friendship was the next best thing. I truly believed it was for Veronica and Logan as well. She had too much pride and a stubborn streak the size of California so no way would she reach out to Logan first. So I had done it for her. I swiped her phone while was still sleeping and helped myself to his phone number. Sneaky and wrong, maybe. But my heart was in the right place.

I had just finished my burger when a man slide into the booth with me. I looked up ready to ask what he thought he was doing when my breath got caught in my throat. I looked into his brown eyes and knew instantly who he was. I would know him anywhere. Even after fifteen years. "What do you want?"

His voice slightly palled at the grave sound of my voice but he composed himself quickly. "I know you told me a while back that you didn't want anything to do with me but I was hoping you had changed your mind."

"I haven't." My good mood now officially bad, I glared across the table at the man who walked away from my mom and I all those years ago. He was handsome, just as mom always claimed. He was tall and muscularly built with light colored hair cut short and his brown eyed matched mine. It instantly made me want to stab a fork in my own just so I didn't have to the color from him anymore. I didn't want anything from this man, even something genetic.

"I know I have made mistakes, Loren. I would like a chance to rectify that." I ignored the pleading way his words stretched across the table to me. I wouldn't feel bad for the man who broke my heart. And my mother's.

"I don't want anything from you, _Trent. " _ His face colored slightly at the harshness of my voice. It probably didn't help that I used his name rather than dad. "Why can't you just leave me alone?"

"I just want a chance to be your father." He reached across the table to take my hand but I yanked it back and placed it on my lap beneath the booth. "I am opening a hotel in Los Angeles. "

"Good for you."

"I would like to spend some time with you now that I am moving back here."

I shook my head. "I don't have any free time." This would be true just as soon as my school transfer went through. But even if I did have nothing but free time, I wouldn't spend it with him.

"I don't blame you for being angry with me. I didn't handle myself well when I left you and your mom. "He didn't sound proud of himself.

"You didn't handle anything. You tucked me in one night and you were gone when I woke up. No note, nothing just gone. "An image of me at four years old passed through my mind. I was sitting at our kitchen table listening to my mom try to explain to me for the fifth time that my daddy wasn't coming home. He wouldn't be eating dinner with us. He wouldn't be teaching me to ride my bike without the training wheels and he wouldn't be reading Cinderella, my favorite book, to me at bedtime. Instead mom read to me that night and every other night afterwards. I stopped believing in fairy tales that night. Stopped believing in happily ever after's.

"What can I do or say to make this better? " His face and voice both reeked of desperation and it made me sick to stomach.

And made anger rage through my body. "You can't do anything. I don't need a dad anymore. I am grown up now. Time flies when you abandon your wife and daughter. "

"I am so sorry, Loren. "

"Save your apology. I don't need it. I have a happy life. I was loved. No, I was adored. My mom made sure I had every single thing I could ever want or need. With absolutely no help from you. Not even child support. But its fine because we made do. We were happy." I willed myself not to cry even though that's all I wanted to do. But this man wasn't worth any of my tears. Not ever again. "And we are happy now. Especially mom. "I saw his hand shake slightly but forged on anyway. "She has a man in her life that loves her more than his own life. He would die before he ever hurt mom the way you did. And he wouldn't ever hurt me that way either. Max loves us, both of us, the way you should have but didn't."

"I didn't leave because I didn't love you, Loren. Or your mother. I loved you both very much. I just couldn't deal with my life. I was young. "

"So was mom. But she stayed. She sacrificed and worked her butt off to give us a good life. And you know what; she never spoke an ill word about you. Never once. Though she had every reason in the world to." It was true. Mom refused to ever say a single bad thing about the man who broke her heart. She didn't want me to hate him. I do anyway.

"You will never know how much I regret walking away. "

I didn't care about his regrets. I didn't care about him at all. Not anymore. I slide to the end of my side of the booth and stood up. "You can choke on your regrets for all I care. I will never forgive you for leaving me or for breaking mom's heart. But most of all, _Trent, _I will never forgive you for the fact that for the rest of my life; I am always going to feel like I am never good enough for a man to love. To choose me. You set such a great example of leaving without looking back that I am terrified every man I love will do that to me. So yeah, thanks for that, _daddy. _ Do not EVER contact me again. "

I stumped away from him with my head held high and I didn't look back. And I made it to my mom's borrowed car and half way to the grocery store to meet Veronica before I finally broke down and let my tears flow. I cried for the little four year old me who adored her daddy. For the adult me that wished deep down that he hadn't left me. And I cried for the fact that it's my father's fault that I will never be able to truly let my heart open for Eddie again. Whether he wanted to or not, he had left me too. Just like my daddy did. Just like every guy would always do.


	6. Author's Note :)

Hey lovely readers. I just wanted to add a quick note here because I have been getting so many pms asking me why I stopped writting. I have NOT! I did have chapter 5 done but I went back and rewrote one scene because I was unsure of it and rightly so. Thanks to one of you lovely fans of this story (** tricelander**) I was able to see that a certain event needed to go a different way :) However in doing that I ended up having to rewrite the entire chapter...which is almost done...not quiet but almost. I should be able to finish it up and get it edited very soon and I will post it. It will be worth the wait I promise. Its long and full of drama.

The second thing I wanted to say is thank you so much to all of you who have supported this ( and all my other stories) . You guys are the best and I am truly and eternally grateful :)

In the meantime if you want to follow me on twitter to talk about HH or anything else, I will follow you back :) my screen name is LaceyLou82.

Thank you all again so very much :)


	7. Chapter 5

_**A/N : its been forever, I know. I have no excuses except that I was blocked for awhile and then after I wrote this whole thing, I kept changing stuff around and it was this whole thing weird situation. I am still not one hundred percent happy with this but it's done. Actually this is only the first part of Chapter 5. It ended up being just about 50 pages on a WORD document so I broke it up. I will post the second part in the middle of the week, most likely Wednesday, I promise. I have added Veronica's point of view to this for a reason so those of you that keep private messaging me about not liking Veronica and not wanting to have her in this story because she doesn't fit, well I am sorry but to me she does. She will have a purpose later on and before I get anymore nastly messages about her and Eddie...not she is not for Eddie. She is Loren's friend, Eddie's friend and has her own little sub story in this. If you don't like it, well all I can say is that I am sorry. And be warned she is around for the duration. **_

_**And I won't call out a specific name but the person who left me the review that my story doesn't make sense because Eddie doesn't act like he has amnesia...please enlighten me about how an amnesic behaves.**_

_**And special shout outs to Tricelander and Marirosa...thank you both for your support and words of encourage.**_

_**To everyone else, I can't express how much your reviews and alerts have meant to me. There really are no words to express how much you all mean to me. Thank you just doesn't seem to be enough. But I am grateful more so than you will ever know. **_

_**Also, I do not own anyone in this story...they all sadly belong to other people...I am just borrowing them. **_

Remember Me Chapter 5:

_**Veronica**_

I could tell something major happened the second Loren stepped out of the car and made her ways towards where I was waiting on a plastic bench outside of Murray's Grocery. Her steps were unsure, her face was red and puffy from crying and her eyes had lost the remaining little bit of sparkle that was left behind after the whole Eddie debacle. I didn't need my super sleuth skills to kick in for me to know that someone had hurt my friend terribly. "What happened?"

She shook my question off as she tried to walk past me and enter the double doors leading to the inside of the store but I wasn't having it. I grabbed her arm and pulled her down on the bench next to me. She left out a shaky but annoyed breath which I chose to ignore as I crossed my arms over the blue of my t-shirt and focused my eyes on her with a look that told her that we weren't going anywhere or doing anything until she spilled her guts to me. I was pretty new at this whole best friend thing…well not new exactly, but it's been awhile. I haven't been best friends with a girl since I was fifteen and Lilly died. But Lilly Kane wasn't like most girls and her biggest problem was coming up with brand new ways to humiliate her mother. Loren and Lilly were different in many ways, but mostly because Loren didn't over react to meger things so I knew that whatever was hurting my friend was pretty bad.

"Tell me what happened? Do I need to introduce sparky to someone, "I asked pointed towards my messenger bag where Loren and I both knew my trusty Taser gun resided. It was my weapon of choice and I just never knew when the need or sometimes just the desire to use it would arise.

"No, no need for that. " She pulled a compact out of her own bag and opened it to access the damage to her makeup. While Loren wasn't vain like most of the female population of California, she was a celebrity and the last thing she would ever want is to be photographed by the rabid disgusting creatures that considered themselves journalists looking terrible. Her brown eyes widened in horror as she took in the mess that was her face in the tiny mirror. "Dear god. I hate him for doing this to me. "She dabbed some powder on her face under her eyes before groaning and shoving the device back into her bag. Now pulling out her baseball cap, she pulled her long dark ponytail through the back of it and settled it lower than usual on her forehead.

"Who? Eddie? Did he do something?" I was at a total lost here. The only guy Loren ever cried over was Eddie Duran but she had never spoken a bad word about the guy who had unintentionally broken her heart. As I asked the question, I knew it wasn't him that she was referring to. It couldn't be.

She shook her head, "no, it wasn't Eddie. I, ah," she was struggling with whether or not to tell me, I could see it in her eyes. I should probably be a little bit annoyed or hurt by her hesitation but honestly I wasn't even surprised by it. Loren and I are friends, great friends, best friends, but life circumstances have taught us both to be cautious with our thoughts and feelings. "I ran into my dad. " Okay so I wasn't expecting that to come out of her mouth but it did explain her hesitation.

The subjects of Loren's dad and my mom were sore for both us. Though wayward parents were just another thing the two of us had in common, it was a painful characteristic to have. She didn't like to talk about Trent any more than I did about Lianne and more often than not we both just avoided the subjects. It was easier, less heart wrenching. She didn't need me to remind her that my dad loved me enough to stay when hers didn't and I didn't her to remind me that her mother loved her too much too ever walk away when mine never could. "Wow." Yes, that was weak, I know but I was surprised.

"Tell me about it. " Loren replied to my lame comment. She used her fingers to play with the strap of her bag as she continued. "He just walked up to me like he had every right to start a conversation with me. "

"What did he want?" My instincts, inherited from my father and his keen detective abilities screamed at me that the timing for this encounter is way off. Loren is famous now and people coming back into her life to ride her coattails to fame and fortune was a distinct possibility.

"A chance to be my father, according to him," it was obvious she was skeptical just like I am. But more than that she was hurt, her eyes gave that emotion away fairly obviously. "He kind of acted like he didn't do anything wrong, like he was just young and stupid. "

And walking away was the only thing he knew to do. It was the same story, different parent. And just like with my mother, I believed it was total bull. A parent doesn't walk away because it's the thing to do for their child. They do it because they are a spineless coward. And coming back usually wasn't for the sake of the child either. Not in my case and the timing told me that Loren's case was the same. "What did you say to that?" I really hoped some of my friend's determination to do what was right for Eddie has rubbed off on her enough to do what was right for herself.

"I told him that it's too late. I don't need a father anymore. Of course I also rubbed Max in his face for my mom. "A spark, small but still there flashed in her brown eyes and I found myself proud of her. She could have done without even mentioning Max Duran's presence in her life as well as Nora's but rubbing salt in open wounds was an abandoned child's prerogative in my opinion. "I was brave and strong until I got away from him. " Now her eyes along with her voice radiated self –loathing, an emotion I am all too familiar with.

I placed a comforting arm around the brunette's shoulder. There weren't really any words to comfort her and if there were, I didn't know what they were. So I settled for just letting her know that I was here if she needed to talk. It is what friends do. "Are you okay, sweetie?"

She nodded but I could see the fresh tears forming in her eyes, "I will be. I just didn't expect this you know? I asked him to leave me alone back when he was texting me and he did. I haven't heard from him since. So why is he trying to be a part of my life again now?" I didn't have the answers that she needed but I really wish I did. Not just for Loren either. Selfishly I wish I had them for me too.

Though I haven't laid eyes on my mom in almost three years now, I know she is out there somewhere and could quite possibly just show up anytime just like she did the last time. Of course I didn't have a fifty thousand dollar check lying around for her to run off with this time so maybe not. Bitterness was hard to keep at bay when my thoughts turned to my mother. But in an effort to be supportive to my friend, I pushed it down and focused on what Loren needed right now. "Maybe he thought you would be more receptive now that some time has passed. " It was lame, but there it was.

"Or maybe he doesn't care about me at all because he couldn't respect the fact that I asked him to stay out of my life. " Anger ebbed into her voice and I felt her shoulders tense under my arm. I gave her a firm squeeze to let her know it was okay and it would be okay. "Maybe he is a selfish jerk and doesn't care about anything or anyone but clearly his conscious because he bailed on his wife and kid. "

I nodded this time, "that sounds about right to me. " I didn't want to hurt her feelings by voicing my worries that the only reason her father is coming around again is because now she is famous and on her way to being a number one selling recording artist and songwriter. All kinds of rodents would start coming out wanting to find a place in Loren's life. I wanted to protect her from that, but I knew that she wasn't a stupid girl; in fact she is probably one of the smartest chicks I know, so she would be able to protect herself from it. I just wish the first rodent wouldn't be her own father and that he wasn't coming, or trying to come back into her life at a time when she was so confused about Eddie. "But listen to me, ok, Lo. I know you are angry, confused even. I get it, believe me I do. You just really need to decide if you want to let your dad in or not because if even a small part of you is wondering if maybe he is sincere, you need to talk to him. "I hated to say it, but I knew from experience that saying and doing are two completely different things when it comes to wayward parents.

"What do you mean?"

"Just that I know how enticing having him back can be. When my mom left, all I ever wanted was for her to come back and when I finally found her, she was falling down drunk. At the time I didn't even care about that, all that mattered was that she was back in my life. I would have done anything for her, and I did only to have it blow up in my face. "Even now it was a tough pill to swallow. I empty out my college fund to set my mom up in a rehab facility only for her to bail on it a couple of weeks later. Of course the money was nonrefundable but even then I didn't care because my mom was finally home. She had moved back in with me and my dad and though things weren't like they used to be, I convinced myself that they were better. It wasn't. My dad was miserable, my mom was still drinking and I was so caught up in finding out who was responsible for my best friend's murder that I didn't notice. Until I almost died at the hands of Lilly's killer and my dad almost died trying to rescue me. Those things made me open my eyes full and bright. I asked my mom to leave our house that night and not only did she do that but she stole money from us. Money that we needed to live on. It didn't seem to matter to my mom though as I never saw her again after that. I don't want my friend to learn the way that I had too. " I just want you to be sure before you decide to write him off completely because if you aren't you are always going to wonder and something will always feel like its missing But if you are sure, you need to stick to it, you need to mean it. "

Loren looked off into the distance for a minute before she brought sad brown eyes to mine, "I am sure, Veronica. It's because of him that I can't truly believe in my relationship with Eddie. I know that I should fight for him because I love him but I just can't believe that my love is enough for him. My dad did that to me. I loved him so much, V. I literally thought he hung the moon. But it wasn't enough because he still left me for a better life. "The tears that were threatening earlier, fell now but Loren just let them as she continued, "when Eddie asked for Chloe that day, I was destroyed even though I knew that it wasn't his fault he couldn't remember. Maybe he does deserve to know the truth but what if he knew and still decided that he wanted to be with Chloe? I couldn't survive that so I fixated on what the doctors said about confusing his memories. It easier to take myself out of the equation and make the choice for him rather than allow him to choose because I know he will choose her. "I wanted to say something, anything to make this better for her, but in all honesty I don't think anything ever will. " My dad put these insecurities inside me and I don't know how to not have them. I don't know how to believe I am good enough for Eddie to love and choose to be with. "

"But you are good enough, sweetie. He did love you. "

"I don't know that, V. He never said the words to me. Never once, he almost choked on the word girlfriend. For all I know, I was a distraction for him to get over his heartbreak. Chloe broke him. She had the power to do that because he loved her. Still loves her, "she amended with a painful look.

"Maybe he loves her because it's all he knows just like being insecure is all you know. " I offered as I moved my arm from around her shoulders and instead grasped her hand. "When he woke up from that coma his brain was all jumbled up, right? He couldn't remember anything from a certain amount of time. But the last memory he has is being in a relationship with Chloe. It's all he knows, Loren. The lies that Chloe told were sugarcoated for his benefit and hers so he just bought into the fact that other than a big fight nothing changed between the two of them. He doesn't know that you were a major part of his life and that the two of you were together. Eddie doesn't believe you are an option for him. All he knows is Chloe. "

I couldn't tell if my theory was making any sense to her as she just sat there staring out in the distance seemingly paying attention to a black SUV as it pulled into the parking lot. The sun shining on it gave it an extra glossy glow as it pulled into a parking space near the front of the row of white lined spaces. Loren continued to stare at it as though maybe she recognized it but then just as quickly as she had turned her focus on it, she removed it and once again met my eyes. Doubt clouded those ever expressive brown eyes now and I felt my frustration level rising. "What if we weren't really together?"

"You can't be serious?" I looked at her as though she had three heads. I may not have been around for the actual relationship but I was certain that there was indeed a relationship.

"I am serious. I mean, Eddie and I spent a lot of time together, yes, but what if I read more into it than it actually was. What if that's why he can't remember me?" Fresh tears fell now and I wished like hell I was better at this emotional stuff because I was seriously at a loss for what to do right now. I didn't know if I should hug her or slap some sense into her or what. I settled for just squeezing her hand with mine and letting her continue her absurdity. " We never had sex or really talked about anything long term so maybe I just wanted it to be a relationship but it really wasn't? "

I couldn't help the eye roll that escaped of its own accord but if Loren noticed she didn't take offense to it. "That's completely ridiculous, Loren. You know very well that you were in a relationship. " Eddie may not have the memories that went along with that relationship but there was no doubt in my mind that deep down somewhere inside of him the feelings were there. I have seen the way the rock star looks at my friend. He feels more than he can understand. "It's a crappy situation but you can't second guess what you and Eddie had, Loren. It was special and it mattered and it meant something to you. You can't just write it off because you are afraid. "

"Isn't that what you did?" I wasn't expecting that and judging by the way that Loren snapped her mouth shut, she wasn't expecting to say it. But she didn't take it back as she looked down at her hands and the question hung in the air between the two of us. The silence was awkward and for the first time since I have known Loren I was sorry for confiding in her.

Drunk on cheap wine or not, I had spilled my guts to her about Logan. It was a first for me because I didn't just talk about my feelings with anyone. I wasn't wired the way most girls were. I didn't do girl talk and trips to the mall. Well, ok, I did once upon a time but that all changed after Logan's father murdered his girlfriend at the time and my best friend. After that I became the girl who kept all of her emotions locked tightly inside and concentrated on solving everyone else's problems. I was good at that. I excelled at it as a matter of fact. It made my father proud that I so easily picked up the family business, but it also gave me other things to concentrate on. Even cheating spouses were better than staring my own emotions and insecurities smack in the face.

Logan Echolles was my biggest insecurity. He was the reason I had decided to take an internship with a security company in San Diego rather than start my sophomore year at Hearst College with the rest of my friends. Our breakup was unpleasant to say the least and it didn't help that we both starting seeing other people within weeks, but my reemerging feelings for him were too much too handle and I knew that if I didn't get away, I would be stuck on the Logan and Veronica roller coaster for the rest of my life. I just couldn't take that ride anymore. And Loren knew it. "Wow low blow Tate. "

Her eyes swung back to mine and the sorrow was clear. "It was and I am sorry. I know Logan is a sore spot with you. "I nodded my agreement with that statement and she continued, "but I feel like maybe you did just write off what you had with Logan because you are afraid of him hurting you."

I tried to keep defensiveness out of my voice but I am not sure I succeeded as I answered Loren the only way I really could, truthfully. "Logan and I are completely different than you and Eddie, Loren. Eddie didn't mean to hurt you. Logan and I have been ripping each other apart since we were sixteen years old. "I had to fight to keep the memories from taking over me. This was the exact reason I never talked about Logan unless my defenses were weak. "Sometimes I think that Logan and I made it our missions in life to make each other miserable. "

"But you loved him? "

"I did." Even when I didn't want to, when I told myself that Logan was just a really damaged guy who would forever be a screw up, I couldn't make myself not love him. "I still do, but we can never work out because we are no good for each other. Logan will always do crazy reckless things when he is hurt and angry because that what he knows. He comes by it naturally between his mother and his father and I could never blame him for that but I can't deal with it either. "I let myself believe in Logan too many times and every time I was sorry. I couldn't make that mistake again. I might not survive the pain this time.

"So how do you just turn it off then?" She shrugged her shoulders helplessly. "How do I see him every day and not remember the good times again? How do I not long for things to be the way they used to be?"

I didnt have the answers she needed because I didnt have them for myself. I tried living in close proximity to Logan, tried to be his friend even, after our breakup, our last one that is, but it didnt work out. The tense, longing looks, the shy smiles and knowing eyes and the unbelievable awkardness that occured everytime he saw me with Piz or I saw him with Parker was just too much too handle. So the first chance I got, I pulled a trick from my mom's book and I ran. It was cowardly and weak but maybe that wasnt always a bad thing. Maybe sometimes running is what is best for everyone. " I dont know, Loren. Logan and I never took our breakups well. We always found oursleves resulting back to hating each other and trading insults. Except the last time. We tried to be friends. But not really. Trading pleasantries in the food court and pretending to be happy for him because he seems happy with Parker isnt the foundation of a good friendship. "

Loren seemed to take my words in and I hoped this would be the end of the Logan conversation but of course it wasnt because she launched into another question that I just wasnt prepared for today. " But you tried? Why did you stop?"

I let out a long sigh as I considered her question. It wasnt a simple answer or even one I could honestly say I had an exact answer for because the truth is that Logan is never far from my mind despite the geographical distance between us or the fact that I am still in a relationship with Piz. " It was just too hard. I guess it really started being too much after he beat up Piz. "

I was beyond angry with my ex for beating my current boyfriend to a bloody pulp over something I was sure Piz would never do. It was just like Logan to act first and ask questions later. His reckless, careless behavior has always been an issue for us and even in friendship it was too much. I ended my association with Logan that day. I painfully told him that we just couldnt keep doing this, that we were completely done this time. I had meant it too. I ignored the fact that it stirred something way down deep inside me that even after our breakup he would still do what he did to protect me. As crazy as his actions were, I knew that it was his way of defending me. " It was hard for me to remember why Logan and I were a bad idea when he did something that was so clearly his way of protecting me. I felt myself being pulled back towards him. Especially after his beat up Gory. "

" The mob guy, right? The one who was really responsible for that video of you and Piz?" Loren asked.

" Thats the one. I warned Logan not to start with him because he was connected but he completely disregarded my words and literary kncoked the guy on his butt. For me. Logan risked the wrath of the mob to protect my honor. I should have been annoyed or angry but instead I was impressed. I found it kind of attractive and I just really wanted to be with him again. Despite everything that happened, I just wanted to be with Logan again. " Nothing in the past mattered at that point. I completely forgot that Logan and I were in a crowed food court with people's eyes jumping back and forth between the two of us. My eyes met his and just like that I was hooked on him all over again. Luckily my senses kicked in and I pulled myself out of the situation. I had too for my own sanity. " I couldnt go there again. I just couldnt. "

Loren shook her head, " but I just dont understand how you just pulled yourself out of it. I mean, you moved away, and rarely ever talk about him. I moved away but Eddie is always on my mind and always in my conversations. I dont know how to pull myself out of it. I really want to Veronica. I dont want to love him anymore. " The meaning of her words hit her and Loren's eyes filled with tears again. " I dont want to love him if he cant love me. "

" Just because there is distance between Logan and I doesnt mean that I dont miss him. And just because I dont talk about him doesnt mean he isnt on my mind. He is all the time. Its not easy to get over someone, Loren, but its not supposed to be. Not if what you feel for them is the real thing. " For me, Logan was the real thing. I wasnt foolish enough to believe otherwise but I also wasnt fooling myself into thinking that the two of us could ever make our relationship work.

I had no doubt in my mind that Eddie was the real thing for Loren too. I just wish it was easier for the two of them. They didnt deserve to be apart because of some stupid car jacker and a crazy ex girlfriend who took advantage of Loren's worries and insecurities. Sometimes life really did just suck.

" I never expected love to be such a complication in my life, " Loren confessed. " I mean, I have dreamed about what it would be like if I ever truly fell in love. I just never expected it to be with a rock star and I never expected to be so easily forgotten by the first guy I ever truely fell for. "

" Love isnt something we are supposed to expect or plan for. Its just supposed to happen. Thats probably why its so powerful you know?" I dont know when the hell I started sprouting such poetic crap but it sounded good even to my own cyncical ears. " Apparently its suppose to smack us upside the head and we are supposed to be grateful for it. " Ok so I still have the bitterness. Can you really blame me though? I mean the man I love broke my heart by having sex with the girl who made my high school years a living hell.

Loren turned so that she was facing me and rested her hands on her lap, " Thats the thing, V, I was grateful for it. I loved every second of my relationship with Eddie. I actually let myself believe we could and would have a future but now that we cant, the disappointment is so incredibly consuming and devastating. "

" I know. Believe me, I do. " My answer to dealing was to throw myself into whatever case happened to land on my desk at the time and ignore my emotions. That wasnt an option for Loren. She was far too emotional of a person to ignore what she was feeling. She tried being away from Eddie but her life was way too intertwined with his. They couldn't stay away from each other no matter what. " You decided to try to be Eddie's friend though right?" She nodded and looked off into the distance again. " Thats a huge step, Loren. You are willing to try to do something that is completely out of your comfort zone because you need to have Eddie in your life. You are way braver than I am because I ran the first time things got complicated between Logan and I. As for your dad, all I can say is that you need to listen to your heart? "

Still looking out into the distance Loren sighed and nodded once again, " my heart is telling me that he cant be trusted. " The sadness in her voice was expected. It really is a shame when you cant trust the people who gave you life, but sometimes, sometimes it was just the way things were. No matter how much pain is accompanied by that particular truth. " Trent messed me up really bad, Veronica. I cant just forget that and let him in my life. I can't forget that he walked out on me and my mom and that we struggled my whole life. I just can't let it go." She started crying again and I let her as I moved closer and pulled her into my arms.

I let her cry for a long while completly aware but not caring about the looks we were getting from people entering and exiting the grocery store. I have never been one to care what other people thought about me after all. Finally, Loren's sobs subsided and her shoulders relaxed. " Feel better, now? "

She pulled back and gave me a small smile as she wiped her eyes with the sleeve of her hoodie. " Sorry about that. I guess I really just needed a good cry. "

" Did it help?"

" Yes. I am sure about my feelings regarding Trent. I don't want or need him in my life, but it still hurts. " Playing with the two black strings hanging from the neck of her hoodie, Loren looked over at me and once again her eyes spoke for her. She was nervous about something. I assumed it had to do with her newfound resolve to be friends with Eddie, but when she pulled her bottom lip into her mouth and started nibbling on it with her teeth, I was sure that wasn't it. Before I could ask her what was going on, she floored me with a statement I never expected to hear. " I met with Logan today. "

I didn't need to look in a mirror to know that my face showed my emotions completely and accurately. Shock, anger and betrayal swam around my body and I didn't know which to deal with first. I just sat there glaring at the person I trusted most in my life. Well , up til now anyway.

"I wasn't going to tell you. I wanted to surprise you but you have been such a great friend to me. I can't keep this from you. I got his number out of your phone this morning and asked him to meet with me. I invited him to the dinner party tonight. " Her explanation was full of sorrow and guilt but I didnt care.

I didnt say anything because I simply didnt know what to say. This girl was my roommmate, my best friend, she knew how I felt about Logan and all the reason I couldnt deal with him and our past yet she still went behind my back to contact him. It was like a slap in the face. I grabbed my bag from its place on the concrete near my feet and stood up. " I cant believe you would do this to me. " WIthout another word, I left her sitting there and made my way to my car. I heard her call out my name and the sobs that accompanied it, but I was too upset right now to deal with this. So yet again taking my cues from the great Lianne Mars, I ran.

_**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**_

I ignored my constantly ringing cell phone during the short drive back to Loren's mother's house. It was Loren calling. I didnt need to look at my screen to see her name. I knew it was her. I couldn't and wouldn't talk to her right now. My anger was too close to boiling over and I knew myself well enough to know that I would say something to her that I wouldn't be able to take back.

I slammed through the front door of Nora's house with the intent to pack up my small amount of stuff and drive to Neptune to stay with my dad. I was no longer in the mood for a party and certaintly not one that Logan Echolls would be attending.

" Veronica. " I was halfway to Loren's room when Eddie's voice called out to me. I whipped my head around and found him sitting at the kitchen table. " Are you okay?" His voice was laced with concern and I found myself retreating towards the kitchen. My first instinct was to repay Loren by blurting out everything that I knew about her time with Eddie. I wanted to do that so badly, but I wouldn't. I couldn't. No matter how mad I was at her right now, deep down inside my somewhere there was a voice reminding me that Loren Tate didn't do things to intentionally hurt people.

I didnt make it a habit to unload my problems to virtual strangers. Maybe Eddie wasnt exactly a stranger, and I did consider him my friend, but it wasnt really the same as my friendships with Loren, Mac and Wallace. Okay so maybe , possibly, Mac and Wallace weren't privy to my still lingering feelings for Logan. My high school friends still believe that I am devoted to my relationship with Piz.

I joined Eddie at the table and pulled out the chair next to him. Sheets of music were spread out in front of him along with about a million crumpled pieces of paper. " Are you like in the zone or something?" I joked.

" I wish. " He tossed his pencil down and sighed, " I don't seem to be able to get more than a lyric down before I decide its crap and start over. " He picked up a can of soda and sipped from it before turning curious brown eyes on me. " You aren't your perky self, whats wrong?"

Eddie was about as removed from the situation as someone could get. He didnt know about my past with Logan and he never listened to me drunkenly declare my love for the guy who broke my heart. He was probably the most objective person I knew. " Loren and I had a fight."

He seemed surprised by the revelation as he raised his eyebrows and made a confused face, " about what?"

" Long story...but basically she feels like I need to deal with a situation that I don't feel like dealing with so she intervened on my behalf. " I still couldn't believe that Loren would be so sneaky. It wasn't in her character at all. " She just doesnt understand. "

Eddie pushed the papers in front of him off to the side and propped his elbows up on the table. " Obviously I have no idea what is going on, but is it possible that Loren's intentions are honorable?"

They were. I knew it deep down. Loren would never purposefully hurt me and the fact that she called Logan and invited him to join us for dinner was not some ill willed plan. " I know that she thinks she is helping me. But forcing Logan on me isn't helping. " Before I knew it, I was telling Eddie Duran, international rock star all about my sorted past with Logan. I told him about Logan's capacity for danger and his recklessness. My trust issues, thank you very much mom, and how no matter what, I am always waiting for the other shoe to drop where Logan is concerned. It all just came pouring out.

To Eddie's credit, he didn't look completely tramazied by the fact that I had just vented to him. He just sat there listening to me. He didn't even flinch when I almost cried as I talked about how finding out that Logan slept with Madison Sinclair was the last straw for me because she was the girl who handed me a spiked drink at a party and that drink ended up being the reason I was raped. Finally after it was all out and we had sat in slience for a few moments, Eddie spoke. " Do you feel better?"

I nodded because I did. Getting it all out helped, even though I wasn't drunk this time and my emotions weren't numbed my alcohol. "Yes but I still dont know how to deal with Logan. Loren had no right to invite him."

" Maybe not, but she didn't do it to hurt you. We both know that. " He was so sure of someone that he didn't even remember meeting and that just confirmed my earlier thought that Eddie cared more about Loren than he could understand. He really barely knew her but was defending her actions. I couldn't get mad about that even if I wanted to.

" Ok, but how does she expect a simple dinner party to just fix everything? Logan doesn't know a single person that is coming tonight Eddie. Its going to be insanely ackward. " Logan doesn't do well in awkward situations. He drinks and nothing good every happens from that. Ever.

"But he agreed to come anyway. " Eddie pointed out.

Which means that he is doing it because I will be here. Logan wants to see me. I can't even calculate exactly how long its even been since we saw each other. That day in the food court when he beat up the mob guy seemed so long ago. I left town the next day and only showed up in Neptune occasionally if the need arose but always made sure that I wouldn't run into Logan. " He did. "

" Maybe that should tell you something. Obviously I don't know this guy but if he is willing to eat dinner with a bunch of strangers just for the chance to see you, be near you, maybe you should at least hear him out. "

I hated to admit it but Eddie had a point. It was a major deal that Logan was stepping out of his comfort zone. " Fine. I won't run off to Neptune just yet. Maybe seeing Logan could help me finally put him in my past where he belongs. "

Eddie sat quietly for a minute but then looked up at me with a questioning look. " Veronica, what if this meeting doesn't give you closure? What if it only makes you want to see him more?"

There was a good possibility of that happening, deep down I knew that, but I chose to ignore that fact and concentrate on making it through this dinner. And somehow I felt like Eddie wasn't talking about Logan and I as much as he was talking about himself. " What do you mean?"

" I don't even know. I guess i don't know. I am not an expert on relationships. I just don't really know how the whole closure thing works. Is it ever really over between two people who care so much about each other? " His eyes were focused on something behind me so I turned around and found that he was staring at a photo of Loren and Nora that was hanging from a magnet on the fridge.

I could tell by the pure happiness on Loren's face in it that the photo was taken either before her Eddie days or during. ln all the time that I have known her, I have never seen her smile so wide or her eyes shine so brightly. It deinitely wasn't a more recent photo of the mother and daughter. " Thats a great picture on them, huh ? " I turned back towards Eddie in time for him to look down at his hands in embarrassment. " What's going on Eddie? "

He shrugged his shoulders and looked up at the photo again. " I don't know. I can't stop feeling like Loren and I have some kind of connection beyond what I have been lead to believe. I can't stop thinking about her. " He obviously wasn't happy about the fact if his tone of voice was any indication. " I wish I could say that its just because she is here now but the truth is that even when she wasn't here, I felt it. To be honest, I have always felt it. "

I knew it. I wanted so badly to let a smile escape because I knew that Eddie felt something but instead I kept my expression neautral. " Loren has that effect on people. I feel like I have known her forever, rather than just a few months. " I tried to make it seem like it was just a part of Loren's infectious personality so that maybe he wouldn't put me on the spot. I didn't particularly like lying to people, especially to their face. And as mad as I was at Loren for butting her nose into my relationship with Logan, I wasn't about to repay her by filling Eddie in on the real reason he had such an overwhelming pull to my best friend. It wasn't right and unlike Loren, my intentions wouldn't be as honorable. I would only be doing it for payback.

" That's not it and you know it, Veronica. In fact, " he gave me a serious look and I actually felt myself squirming. Me, Veronica Mars, squirming? What the hell? That never happened. I have been questioned by the darn FBI and never batted an eyelash. How was it possible that a rock star could make me so nervous? Ugh. " In fact, I am pretty sure you know all about my real connection to Loren. You know all about the secrets that no one else wants to let me in on. " He wasn't angry , but frustration dripped from his voice. I couldn't help but feel bad for him. I wanted to help him.

After all, he has never been anything but kind to me. In the handful of times I have spent time with him, Eddie always made it a point to start the small talk or ask me how I was. It certainly couldn't be fun for him to know nothing about a whole hunk of time in his life. It had to suck, in fact. "What exactly do you want to know Eddie? "

" I am not asking you to betray, Loren. I just need to know something. "

I knew that I had to be careful here because just one wrong word could in fact betray Loren. Despite our recent disagreement, the last thing I wanted to do was jeopardize my friendship with her. But I knew what it was like to not remember something about my life. It took me over a year to find out what happened the night I was raped in high school and I wouldn't wish that kind of horribleness on anyone. "What? "

" Did I do something to hurt Loren? Is that why she is so tense around me? " The fear that he had hurt Loren was evident in his eyes.

It wasn't what I was expecting him to ask me, but I could handle this. This question I could answer without getting into trouble with Loren. " No. You didn't do anything to hurt Loren." It was the truth but I could tell from the incertainity in Eddie's eyes that he didn't believe me. "Circumstances beyond her control hurt Loren. " I was tempted to tell him the whole story just so that he and Loren could finally make thier way back to one another, but it wasn't my place. And so that I wouldn't be tempted to go beyond simple answers to any more of his questions, I stood up and pushed my chair in. " I need to make some phone calls so I will see you for dinner."

_**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**_

_**Loren**_

" Ok, you know I love you Lo, " Melissa told me as she filled my glass for the second time. I washed as the dark colored cola washed over the ice cubes and didn't bother to meet my best friend's eyes because I already knew what she was going to say next. " But you were kind of out of line. "

" You would have done the same thing I did, Mel. I know you would have. " I knew when I called Logan that I was stepping into bad terrority but I honestly just wanted to help my friend.

" Yes, but you are not me. It's completely in my nature to butt my nose into everyone else's business. However, it's not in yours. " She replaced the cap on the bottle of soda and placed it back in her refridgetaor before joining me at the small table in her kitchen.

The kitchen was the largest room in Mel's two bedroom apartment. She had told me once that the owner of the buiding used to rent out the apartments to students at the cooking school a couple of blocks down so that was her excuse for the fact that the kitchen was the largest room in all of the apartments in the building. It would have ordinally been a ridiculous notion that Mel, Queen of Take- out Sanders would have such a large kitchen but the fact that she had put a partion down the middle of the room and declared that it was half kitchen half media room was all Melissa. As were the brightly colored appliance scattered all over the room. From the yellow blender to the red microwave, this place screamed my best friend's name. It really made me happy that Mel was able to find a place that she loved so much that she put her own personal touches on. It was a home and she was obvously happy here. I was jealous of that. I wanted to find my own place. But the truth was every place in this town was tainted with memories for me. My house, the cafe, MK, Eddie's penthouse. Every where that I love had some kind of memory of me and my rock star. I took a frustrating breath to force the thoughts out of my head and concentrate on the issue at hand. I really did need to stop thinking about Eddie. I possibly just ruined my friendship with someone I really care about. " I just want Veronica to be happy, Mel. She pretends to be but she really isn't. "

"Does that not sound at all fimiliar to you, Lo?" Mel quirked her eyebrows suggestively. Of course I know what she is referring to but I feel like being stubborn at the moment so I just look at her curiously. " You are pretending to be happy too, Loren. You walk around pretending that you have this monster great life but in reality you are probably the most unhappy person I know. "

Okay, wow. I had no idea Mel felt like that. It actually freaked me out a little bit. " I am happy, Mel. I love my life. "

Mel shook her head. " Stop it. You love that you are following your dreams but you are so completely miserable it makes the rest of us feel miserable. " She picked up the empty napkin holder from the middle of the table and twirled in her hands. " Do you have any idea how frustrating it is for those of us that love you to sit idly by and watch as you grow more and more unhappy each and every day?"

I didn't really know what to say, to be honest. I guess I didn't really think about how my family and friends would deal with the fact that I was pushing my own happiness aside to focus on what was best for Eddie. Melissa and my mom especially deserved some consideration. Afterall they were privy to practically my entire relationship with Eddie. They went through it all right by my side. " I am so sorry Mel. I didn't realize."

" I know. Look, I understand what you are doing. I really do. I don't like it though, Lo. I really do believe that Eddie can handle the truth. "

" Its not about him handling the truth about him feeling like he owes me something. " I hope Mel could understand what I am saying but judging by the look she was giving me, she didn't get it. Maybe no one else did either. Maybe I was a selfish jerk who was only thinking about myself and my feelings in this whole situation. " I don't want Eddie to be in a relationship with me now just because he was in one with me before. " And I knew Eddie well enough to know that he would feel obligated to be with me. He wouldn't want to hurt me. He is a nice guy, not even some jerk with a drug problem and a criminal record could change that. And nice guys don't like to hurt people who care about him.

" Do you want to know what I think?" Mel asked as she placed the holder back down and picked up her phone. She began scrolling through it as she continued. " Of course you do. I think that you are scared. Things between you and Eddie were changing before the accident. Maybe your relationship started out kind of one-sided on the feelings front but by the end it was obvious that you weren't the only one in love. " She held her phone out to me and I saw a picture of Eddie and I staring back at me. I was looking at the camera, Mel's phone camera, but Eddie wasn't. He was beside me, looking at me. He was focused completely on me and a small, amazed smile appeared on his face. " I took this the last time the three of us hung out before Eddie was mugged. Do you see the way he is looking at you, Lo?" I nodded, still looking at the photo. " He loved you, Loren. I don't care what he said or what you think, Eddie Duran loved you. Deep down inside of him somewhere that love is still there and I think that it scares the hell out of you."

" Why would it scare me?" I asked still engrossed by the picture I never knew my best friend had taken. The way that Eddie was looking at me in it made my heart ache and my body tingle. He really did look at me like maybe, just maybe he loved me. Loved being the opportive word of course. Past tense. Eddie loved Chloe now. He was with Chloe now.

Mel shook her head at me and pulled her phone away so that I couldn't look at the photo anymore. I wanted to reach out and take it back but instead I just stared down at my hands. " It scares you because if Eddie loves you like you love him then maybe you will do something to chase him away." Okay I now officially believe that my best friend knows me better than anyone else could and ever would. Talk about hitting the nail on the head. " You still blame yourself for your dad walking out and you are petrified that you will make any guy that loves you do the same thing."

I didn't argue with her because it would be pointless. She was right and we both knew it. I was scared for Eddie to love me. Just like I was scared to let my dad back into my life in case I still wasn't good enough for him. I couldn't bare it if he left again and I couldn't bare it to loose Eddie again. " You think you are so smart, don't you?"

" I know I am. Look, Loren, I get it okay. You are afraid of getting your heart broken." She pulled my hands apart and put hers over mine, " but you are being incredibly stupid."

" What? " Mel was really putting all of her feelings about this situation out in the open today. I frowned wondering exactly how long she had kept it all in. Mel has never been the type to bottle up feelings. She was one of the few people I could count on to really tell it like it is.

" Loren you handed Eddie over to Chloe on a silver platter." Mel shook her head and continued, " You didn't even put up a fight for him, you just jumped in your car and drove to another town."

" Mel, " Again, she was right and even though I wanted to agrue with her about my reasons, none of them seemed to make sense right now. I did practically hand Eddie over to Chloe because I didn't stick around to inform him about our relationship. The doctor started talking about how Eddie being fed information regarding his life could affect his recovery and I balked. I was a coward. " I don't know what to say. "

Mel smiled truimphantly because she obviously got her point across. " Exactly. "

" But whether I stayed or not, Eddie wouldn't remember me and I still wouldn't be with him. " No matter what, Eddie would always choose Chloe. He loved her when I met him and he loves her now. He wouldn't be with her if he didn't. A bump on the head or not, Eddie didn't fake feelings. He just wasn't that kind of guy.

"Says who?"

Fate, the universe, the story of my life. " Says me. I can't be with someone that doesn't ever even remember being with me. " I would always feel like an obligation to Eddie and that would be the last thing on this earth I would ever want. Things are just better the way that they are. " Besides, Eddie wanted Chloe. " Why couldn't anyone understand this? Did it really not make any sense? It made perfect sense to me.

Mel let out a long breath and shook her head at me again. " So what? He asked for Chloe because he happens to remember their sham of a relationship. And maybe deep down inside he cares about her but he doesn't love her. "

It took all I had not to roll my eyes. Mel had decided months ago that she was an expert on Eddie's feelings for Chloe. Today was not the first time she has uttered that statement to me. "Why do you think that?" However, today was the first time I ever asked her to explain.

" Because I see the way he looks at her. I see the way he acts around her. They don't even kiss in public. " Mel glared at me as though that should just explain everything. It didn't.

This time I did roll my eyes. It just couldn't be helped. " That doesn't prove anything."

"Of course it does. Come on, Lo. Eddie is an affectionate guy. He and Chloe used to be all over each other. There was a time we couldn't pick up a tabloid without seeing them on the cover kissing. Now he doesn't even hold her hand." She downed the rest of her drink and got up to put her glass in the sink. Turning back around and leaning against the stainless steel, she continued, " Think about it Loren. When was the last time you saw them holding hands, whisptering sweet nothings to each other or kissing?"

Now that I thought about it, I couldn't remember a single time since Eddie woke up that I have seen he and Chloe engaging in any form of public display of affection. The few occasions when we have all been together, like Adrianna and Phil's wedding, they didn't even hold hands. And when Chloe kissed him, it was always a quick little peck that Eddie didn't preciprocate. " That doesn't really prove anything, Melissa. Eddie is in a wheelchair now, maybe he feels self-conscience or something. "

It was Mel's turn to roll her eyes and she did so just a dramatically as she does everything else. She added a little chuckle to it and looked at me like I was the one who was off my rocker. " If you and Eddie were together and he was feeling self-conscious would you let him get away with that?"

I wouldn't and we both knew it. Eddie's wheelchair didn't change who he was to me in the least little bit. He was still the same man he always was. But I couldn't think about this right now. I didn't come here to talk about my relationship with Eddie or his with Chloe. " Mel, I really don't want to deal with this right now. I've had a really bad day and I just ..."

Mel waved her hands wildly, " I know, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have even gotten started on the subject of Eddie. Let's get back to Veronica. Do you really think that she is gonna stay mad at you?" She sat back down at the table and leaned back in the chair.

I shrugged my shoulders because I really didn't know. Veronica and I have never really had a disagreement before. We pretty much saw things in life the same way. Yes, I was out of line for inviting Logan to dinner with us but my intentions were good. Not that it really mattered because if I put myself in Veronica's shoes, I would be angry too. Her relationship with Logan was a personal thing between the two of them and I never should have interferred.

" I am sure she will forgive you, Lo. Right now she is probably more angry with the fact that she is going to have to come face to face with the guy than she is with you. " Mel seemed so sure of what she was saying and I wanted to believe her but I just didn't know if I could. " Seriously, Loren, it will all work out. You are a good friend, Veronica knows that. When she is over the shock and worry of facing Logan , she will realize that what you didn't wasn't that bad and that you didn't mean to hurt her and you will be friends again. We will all be friends again. " Mel smiled in a way that told me that it really would all work out just because she said so. I really did miss her so much.

" I hope you are right."

"I am always right. " Reaching across the table, Mel took my hand again , " And don't even worry about that douchebag father of yours. He isn't worth a second thought let alone anymore tears. He left you because he is a jerk and thats his problem to live with. You haven't needed him in all these years and you certainly don't need him now. You have Papa Max now. "

I couldn't contain my smile about that fact. Max Duran was truely a remarkable man and mom and I were both so lucky to have him in our lives. And Mel was right, he was all the father that I would ever need. Max loves me, for me, and he adores and loves my mom more than anyone ever has before. " You are so right about that. How did we ever get so lucky?"

Mel swept her long hair off her shoulders and fluttered her eyes, " Your awesome best friend entered your song into a song writing contest. I totally started the ball rolling . "

I couldn't not smile and laugh at that, so I did both and for the first time since my meeting with Trent I felt okay again. Yes, Veronica was mad at me and yes things with Eddie were still, well a mess, but I had the best friend in the world and coming over here after Veronica left me at the store was the best decision I made today because I felt better. And more blessed than I probably had a right to because I really did have the world's greatest best friend.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

_"Hey Loren, its mom. I just wanted to let you know that Max and I are going away for a couple of days. You can reach us on our phones if you need anything, but please don't need anything. Love you." _ I listened to the message for the second time as I pulled into the cafe parking lot. Mom and Max were probably long gone by now since she left the message nearly two hours ago and I had left my phone in the car while I was at Mel's apartment. This was just my luck. Veronica was mad at me and I know her well enough to know that she has probably already packed up her stuff and is on the road to Neptune. Which means that I will be alone in my house with Eddie for who knows how long. I can't believe that this is happening.

Turning off the ingition, I unfasten my seatbelt and pull my hat down a little lower as well as pull my hoodie hood up over it. It's a beautiful California day but I am just not in the mood to deal with photographers or other people who recognize me as Loren Tate the singer, rather than Loren Tate the girl who grew up in this town. I am appreciative of all my fans but there were days, like today, that I just wanted to get a cappicino and be on my way. Selfish maybe, but that was my mood today.

The cafe was bustling with business and it was just the kind of day that I would love to work here. I loved being busy and staying busy. It always made the time I was here fly by. I made my way to the counter and order my drink from a tall blonde who I didn't recognize. In fact, as I looked around behind the counter, I didn't recognize any of the workers. I guess I wasn't the only one who moved on from her waitressing days.

I found a table close to the door and was about to sit down when a blast from the past entered my line of vision with a happy smile. " Cameron. " It had been a long time since I had laid eyes on the lacrosse player.

" Hey stranger, how are you?"

I sat down at the table and motioned for him to join me. He did. " I am good. It's so nice to see you." And it really was. I couldn't even remember the last time I had seen him. Graduation? The after party maybe? " What have you been up to?"

" Not much. I am just home for a few days to see my parents. I live in Connecticut now. "

Right...Cameron was going to Yale. I can't believe I had forgotten that. He got a full ride to the best ivy league school in the country. " How is Yale?"

He smiled widely, " It's great. I have a full course load and the lacrosse team is on a roll so things are good."

I smiled back. Life seemed to be good for my old friend and I was happy for him. Very happy for him actually. I was thrilled. He is following his dreams just like I am. " I am happy for you, Cam."

"And I don't have to ask how things are for you, Ms. Pop Princess." He gave me a little chuckle. I couldn't help but be reminded about the little crush I had on him when I was a freshman. He barely noticed me back then. We never really even talked until we were seniors and he needed me to tutor him. He was still such a good looking guy. Not like Eddie, but still really cute. His blonde hair was longer now and he pushed a lock of his out of his face as his blue eyes accessed me. " For someone living the dream, you don't seem very happy. "

For the second time today, I had to resist the urge to roll my eyes. How could I be so easy to read all the time? I wish there was something that I could do about that. " It's been kind of a weird day. Actually, its just been a really bad day. " I took a drink and set my cup back down on the table. "I don't really want to talk about me , though, tell me about you. Have you made a lot of new friends?"

" I wouldn't say a lot, but I have made a few. My rommate is pretty cool. He is a football player though. " He chuckled a little at that but continued on, " Despite its stellar acedimic reputation, Yale is quite the party school."

Now that I could believe. " Oh yeah, so are you like a party animal now?"

He laughed and again I realized how handsome he was. I wondered for a brief minute what my life would be like if I hadn't ever met Eddie and had dated Cameron instead. Would I be at Yale with him? Would we be in a long distance relationship because he was at Yale and I at Brown? Or would I have still been lucky enough to catch my big break and be a recording artist. There wasn't really anyway to know what if and to be perfectly honest, I didn't want to know. Even knowing the way it all turned out, I wouldn't go back and change a second of my life since I met Eddie Duran. And there he was again , creeping into my thoughts at the worst possible time. I really had to stop letting Eddie consume my thoughts. I forced myself to pay attention to Cameron and our conversation. " I don't think I would call myself a party animal, but yeah I can get down. "

Ok now that made me laugh. No matter how hard I tried , I couldn't imagine Cameron getting down. " I'm sorry, but I just can't see that. Seriously though, I am glad that you are happy."

He nodded, " I am. Mostly. I miss my family, and my friends of course. "

I knew that feeling all too well. " Yes, I can understand that. I have been in San Deigo for the last couple of months but I am back now for good. I just missed home too much." And its not like being away really did anything to help me anyway. But I didn't bring that up. What would be the point.

" I didn't know you moved away, how come?"

How could I even begin to explain this to Cameron? I didn't want to say that it was because things with Eddie were a mess. Eddie always seem to cause ackwardness between Cameron and I. Melissa swears it's because Cameron had a crush on me, but I don't know if I buy into that. " I just needed a change. My manager Kelly's brother runs an apartment complex up there so I went for awhile, took some classes , and worked on my album. Nothing too exciting. "

He gave me a look that told me that he knew I wasn't telling him something and I couldn't help but be annoyed. Why is it that everyone thinks that they know me so darn well. Even some guy that I hung out with a handful of times in high school. " I heard about Eddie's accident. How is he doing?"

So much for not talking about Eddie. And Cameron still gets a weird look in his eyes when he says his name. Lovely. " He's okay. Still in a wheelchair, and he's has a wierd case of amnesia but he is alive so we are all really glad about that. "

Cameron nodded and started drumming his fingers on the table. I hated that, but I just remained quiet and tried my best to ignore it. " Yeah, thats always a good thing. Are you two still together? I haven't seen much in the tabloids about Leddie lately? "

Geez, really? Cameron was using a celebrity mash name in regards to me and Eddie? Ugh. But instead of getting into a long blown out conversation about how much I disliked the use of mash names, I smiled and answered his question. " Actually, Eddie and I were never really together. He is back with Chloe. "

Cameron's blue eyes practically leapt out of his head at that statement. Obviously he was surprised to hear the status of our relatonship, or lack there of. " Loren, I was there remember. I know that the two of you were, ah, " he made a face and then continued, " close." He stopped the motion with his hand and gave me a long accessing look, " so what really happened between the two of you?"

" Nothing, Eddie doesn't even remember the time we spent together, so it's not important. He is with Chloe again and they are happy. " I tried to sound like it was no big deal but I knew I failed by the flare of concern that I saw in Cameron's eyes. It was sweet that he cared that much about me, but it was unnecessary. " Really, Cam, I am fine with it. Eddie is alive and happy, thats good news."

" But he hurt you."

My heart soared at the way he was concerned and defensive of me. Every girl wanted a guy to be like that for her. Too bad he wasn't the guy that I wanted to feel like that. Too bad he wasn't the guy that my heart longed for. " Not on purpose. Eddie didn't ask to have his whole life turned upside down. It's just the way things are. I am fine. "

Reaching across the table, Cameron stopped just short of touching my hands that were resting on either side of my cup. " No you aren't. You are pretending to be. You aren't your perky, happy self. "

" I warned you that I was having a bad day." I defended.

" Yes, but it's more than that. You are hurt because Eddie doesn't remember you. " Now he did touch my hand. I wished that maybe that same shiver that appeared when it was Eddie touching me would shoot through me at his touch, but it didn't. Life would and could be so much easier if Cameron was the boy that my heart wanted. Instead when he touched me, I felt comforted. Just like when my mom or Mel touch me. " I am sorry that its over between the two of you."

He was sincere, I could tell by his tone of voice. " Thank you, but really I am okay. " Or I would be, someday. Maybe, hopefully. " Okay so how long did you say you were in town for? " I asked hoping to change the subject. I needed to not talk about this anymore.

Pulling his hand back and settling it on his own cup of whatever it is he was drinking he smiled at me. " A couple of more days. Why? "

" Because, Mel, Phil, Adrianna, the whole gang is getting together tonight for dinner at my place. You should come." It might be nice to have another face in the crowd of people that would be watching me every second to make sure I didn't crack under the pressure of being in the same room as Eddie. Maybe Cameron would actually be fooled by my poker face.

Cameron held up his hand, " Wait a minute...did you just say you were hanging out with Adrianna? Adrianna Masters?"

I couldn't help but laugh at the horrible expression on his face. It really didn't seem like that long ago that Cameron was warning me to watch my back because Adrianna was up to something. " Actually its Adrianna Sanders now." Another look of terror crossed his face and I laughed again. It felt really good too. " Didn't you hear that they got married?"

" No, actually I didn't. "

" It was pretty recently. They wanted to be married before the baby comes." He was taking a drink as I said the last part and as the words sunk in he choked on the liquid. Coughing a couple of times to clear his throat, he looked at me with shock in his eyes.

" They are having a baby? Dear God."

Again, I laughed. " Its not that bad. Adrianna has changed a lot since her dad died. Probably actually since she got pregnant. She and I had a long talk the day after graduation and we are friends now. " Sometimes I still couldn't believe it myself but it was a fact. Adrianna Master Sanders and I were friends. Not just casual friends but pretty good friends, in fact. Friends that talk on the phone twice a week. " Seriously, you should come tonight. It will be fun. "

" Okay, sure. What time?"

I stood up and grabbed my cup, " Around six. I will see you then?"

Cameron stood up as well and nodded, " defintiely. I am really glad that I recognized you. " He gestured towards my hoodie that was still up over my baseball cap. I rolled my eyes and smiled.

" Me too. See you later." I made my way out of the cafe and to my mom's car. Having Cameron around tonight would give me something else to concentrate on. Just a few minutes in his company made me feel a little better than when I first walked into the cafe. Between he and Mel, I doubted I would have to worry about not having a good time. They would make sure that I did.

_**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**_

I knew I should have stayed in the car. Actually, I should have backed out of the driveway and gone back to Mel's apartment. But no the need to take a shower and change for dinner had over powered me and now here I was standing in my living room face to face with Chloe Carter. More accurately an angry Chloe Carter.

"Are you going to go get him or not?" She demanded as she stalked back and forth across my living room rug with her too high, too expensive shoes. She wanted me to go back to Eddie's room and force him to come out and talk to her because apparently they had a fight. I already told her no twice.

From my spot on the sofa, I shook my head, " No I am not. I already told you that its between you and Eddie. If you want to talk to him, go back there and talk to him."

She narrowed her eyes at me, " I already tried that. He locked the door and told me to go home."

"So go home." It was simple enough. Obviously Eddie didn't want to talk to her right now. For whatever reason, he was mad at her. I was curious but not enough to get involved. It wasn't any of my business.

" You would love that, wouldn't you? For me to go home and never come back. So you could steal Eddie away from me again." She moved so that she was standing directly in front of me and I had to look up at her. " I will not let you win, Loren Tate. Eddie is mine, not yours."

My eyes rolled to the back of my head of their own free will and I stood up. I wasn't about to let Chloe think that she had some sort of power over because because she was on higher ground. I was still shorter than she , especially with those god awful shoes on, but I didn't really have to look up at her anymore. It was the small things that made her feel better sometimes. " Get over yourself , Chloe. I am not trying to steal Eddie from you. And just for the record, I wasn't trying before either."

" Yeah right. We both know that you were just waiting in the wings. You couldn't wait for me to screw up so that you could swope in and take Eddie away from me. "

Seriously? This woman was more whacked out than ever. " Chloe, you lied. You cheated. That's why you and Eddie broke up. I had nothing to do with that. "

Obviously the reminder of her past sins wasn't something that she wanted to discuss judging by the quick flash of guilt that I saw in her baby blue eyes. I almost felt bad for her. Almost. This was the same woman who swoped in and pretended that everything between she and Eddie was peachy keen. It may have been my idea to keep the details of my relationship with him a secret but Chloe had decided that since Eddie obviously still cared about her, it was best not to bring the bad stuff up. What else could I do but go along with it. After all I was keeping secrets too. Eddie didn't know about us but he also didn't know about Tyler Roark's relationship with Chloe.

" Don't pretend like you have never made any mistakes, Ms. Perfect." Chloe taunted me.

" I never claimed to be perfect, but I am smart enough not to cheat on a guy as amazing as Eddie. I am smart enough not to use him to advance my career and I am smart enough not to lie to him about every single thing in my past. " I didn't mean to be so...bitchy. Actually maybe I did. Chloe brought that out in me. Even when I tried to tone it down, she just pulls it out.

Chloe apparently found what I said funny because she laughed. It grated my nerves to hear her laughing at me. " Loren, you lie to him every single time you see him. You are no better than me."

" Oh so then you want me to tell hm the truth then? You want me to tell Eddie that he and I were together. That we kissed , multiple times, that we spent a weekend together at Max's bungalow all alone, that you cheated on him with Tyler? Is that what you are saying to me?" I knew it wasn't of course. The last thing that Chloe wanted was for Eddie to know the whole truth because then she would loose him.

" No of course not, but"

" Too late, " a voice from the hallway sounded and both Chloe and I turned towards it. There sate Eddie in his wheelchair glaring between the two of us. His eyes were swelling with anger and confusion and I felt like a rock had materialized in the pit of my stomach. " You just told him. "


	8. Chapter 5 Part 2

_**A/N: Alright ladies! Here is the second part of chapter 5. Remember that I seperated the last update because it was so long so this is the rest of that. It's not extremely long ( only just over ten pages ) and it's only in Eddie's POV. This is just the begining of my plans for the dinner party so if you think that this is it, you are wrong. No worries. Also, my Logan makes his second appearance :) **_

_**I have to admit that I am not overly satisfied with this at all, but its been done for days and to rewrite it would take too much time and energy and I am lazy. I hope that you will all like it anyway. And if not, well sorry. But I promised this part today so I am delivering even if it majorly sucks. Which it kind of does. :( **_

_**People have been asking if this is gonna be much longer...yes. I have plans for this. Twists, turns and surprises. Happy and sad. Though, please remember it is a Leddie story so they are endgame and honestly it's about the journey, isn't it? That's what makes a love story so great. **_

_**oh and I was proofing this while watching my kids play so chances are good that there is still a lot of mistakes...sorry about that. **_

_**Anyway, here it is so enjoy.**_

_**DISCLAIMER: none of these people belong to me. I am borrowing them for entertainment purposes only. **_

_**EDDIE**_

For the first time since I woke up in the hospital, I felt like I was in control of something. Looking from Chloe's startled, shocked expression to Loren's which resembled that of a deer caught in headlights, I knew I had the upper hand here. For once, anyway. I heard a conversation I was never supposed to hear. I now knew the truth. Chloe was a liar and a cheater. Loren was a liar. In fact it seems everyone in my life is a liar.

Even if I had wanted to do so, toning down my anger would be impossible. Especially with guilt written all over thier faces. Neither of them said anything, but Loren shook her head and sat down on the sofa. Chloe just looked like her whole world was about to implode. I guess to be perfectly honest, it was. Deciding that it would be best to deal with her first, I made my way further into the room. It was times like this when I wanted out of this wheelchair more than the ability to breathe. I wanted to be able to walk up to Chloe and get in her face. Instead, I wheeled closer to her. " Tyler? You cheated on me with Tyler Roark?"

"Eddie...No...It's not what you think. " She was obviously searching for the right words to say. Probably, more accurately, the right lie to tell me so that I would believe her.

Not happening. For all intents and purposes, when it comes to Chloe Carter, my eyes are suddenly wide open. "Save your lies and excuses. I want to know the truth. What is going on between you and Tyler?"

She shook her head vigioursly, " Nothing. I haven't seen him in months. I swear. "

" Yes, because your word is gold, right Chloe?" I couldn't contain the anger in my voice and I didn't want to. She needed to get that this wasn't just going to be swept under the rug. " At any time during our relationship, did you cheat on me with Tyler Roarke?"

Her emotions were all over her face so I could tell that she was desperately wanting to lie. To make up some excuse, some reason that this wasn't happening and that she wasn't the one in the wrong. " It wasn't cheating Eddie. I never loved Tyler. "

I heard Loren let out a little sound from the sofa and I couldn't help the glare that I threw her way. I wasn't exactly happy with her either. " Do you have something to say?" I asked turning my attention towards her.

"Acutally, " she stood up and made her way back beside Chloe, " yes I do. " The tone of her voice told me that I wasn't going to like what was about to be said. " You are completely over reacting, Eddie. You have no idea what we were even talking about, do you?" I could hear the hope in her voice, faint but there all the same. She wanted me to not know what they were really talking about. Loren wanted for me to misunderstand.

Too bad for her that I heard it all. " I heard you admit that you and I were together and that Chloe cheated on me with Tyler. I heard it all Loren, so don't try to spin this, ok. I heard enough to know that you have both been lying to me for months. "

" And so that changes everything? " She arched her eyebrows and placed her hands on her hips, " You don't even know the whole story. You and Chloe broke up, she hooked up with Tyler and you used me to get over it. Thats the end of the story. "

" Except that brain damaged or not, I don't use people, Loren. So you saying that I used you to get over Chloe is bull. I would never do that." I don't care how hard I hit my head when that punk knocked me out, there was no way she or anyone else would ever convince me that I was just rebounding with Loren. I am not that kind of guy. I do not just jump into relationships. Hurt and heartbroken or not, I just don't do it. " So now, tell me the truth. "

My eyes and hers seemed to be doing some sort of dueling thing because they met and stuck. I couldn't pull myself away if I wanted to. And I didn't. Apparently neither did she because she didn't back down. It was probably the first time since I woke up that Loren Tate looked at me and continued to do so without backing away or running away. Amazing that it took this to actually get her to do it.

" Why does it even matter, it's not like you can remember any of this. " Chloe spoke up. " You forgave me, we are together. The past is the past. "

"Are you kidding me? " I pulled my eyes away from Loren's and glared at my girlfriend. " I just heard you practically admit to being with Tyler."

Chloe had the nerve to roll her eyes. For the first time ever in my life, I wanted to hit a girl. Now was not the time for her to make gestures like that. But I guess now that my eyes were open concerning her , I could see that it's a part of her personality. Obviously, a part that I blocked out. " Like Loren said, you are over reacting. That thing with Tyler ended months ago. You and I are good now. "

I shook my head and chuckled, " Good? I just found out that every word out of your mouth is a lie. How is that good?"

" Look, this was all Loren's idea, ok. She didn't want you to know the truth. " Chloe turned towards Loren and glared at her, " she decided that you didn't need to know what happened during the time you can't remember. If you are gonna be mad, you need to blame her. "

Loren glared back at Chloe before turning to me, " Look, I just didn't feel like you needed to know about some rebound relationship that obviously meant nothing. " There was a catch in her voice when she said the words. It was barely recognizable but I picked it up and it spoke volumes to me. " The truth is that you and I were friends before you found out about all of Chloe's lies. When everything came crashing down I was there for you. We became better friends and you really helped me launch my career. " She cast another glare Chloe's way, " and we shared a couple of kisses. End of story. "

It wasn't. Everything inside me was screaming that there was more. Loren made it all sound so innocent and unimportant. The look in her eyes though, betrayed her. It meant something to her. Our time together had been important. The fact that I can't remember it eats me up. More than anything else, I want to remember the time I spent with this girl. I need to remember it. " End of story, huh? I don't think so. "

Chloe gave Loren a long look before looking back to me. " Seriously Eddie, this isn't important and shouldn't be an issue. You heard Loren, it was just a couple of kisses. " She was desperate, I could tell. She wanted me to believe that there was nothing else to this.

" Then why not just tell me? Why all the lies? " It was a valid question, I thought. Here these two girls were trying to make me believe that my fling, or whatever, with Loren was nothing more than a simple rebound yet no one really wanted to tell me about it when I woke up. Not either of them, my so -called friends, or even my dad. " If it was so unimportant, why didn't my own father mention it to me?"

Guilt spread across Loren's face, " because I asked him not to. I didn't feel like it was something that you needed to know. It's not like you can remember it anyway. I asked everyone, including Max to keep it to themselves. "

" I told you it was her fault. " Chloe chimed in.

"Shut up, Chloe!" Loren and I said at the same time.

My eyes met hers again and she gave me a small smile.. It was tiny, but it was a smile. " I am sorry, ok. I didn't mean to hurt you. I honestly didn't even think that I would. You can't remember being friends with me back then and you and I only decided last night to try to be friends now. This really doesn't need to be a big deal. "

"But it is, " I informed her. " Ever since I woke up, you have been weird around me. Always looking for a reason to leave the same room, never wanting to get too close to me, none of that screams that we were just friends."

Loren walked over and looked out the big window on the other side of the livingroom, " I don't know what to say to you, Eddie. I have issues, ok. A lot of them, but mostly, I act like that because i don't know how else to act around you. You don't remember us being friends. I don't know what my place in your life is supposed to be. " She was lying. Again. I could tell by the tone of her voice, it was shakey and unsure, and again she wasn't looking at me.

" God, you guys are gross. Look Eddie, now you know the truth so can we please just move past this. " Chloe butted in as she stepped in front of me so that I would have to take my eyes off of Loren's back at the window and look at her. " You and I have been doing so well, please don't let all of this ruin it."

" You cheated on me with Tyler" I was being loud but didn't care. I was mad as hell and I needed somewhere to put all my anger.

Closing her eyes, Chloe nodded once. " Yes. It was one time and it was stupid. I am so sorry. He was always around, practically stalking me. He found out the truth about my mom and threatened to tell you about it so I did want he wanted me to do."

It was harder for me to tell if Chloe was lying. She was looking me right in the eyes and she sounded sincere but something down deep inside whispered to me that she wasn't being honest. And even if she was, the fact was that she cheated on me. Could I really just forget that? " Chloe, I just...I can't, "

But before I could finish, Loren was at Chloe's side, " you forgave her Eddie. You gave her a second chance. This was all in the past so thats where you need to leave it. Up until you easedropped on our conversation, you and Chloe were happy. There is no need to change that because of something that you have already moved past. "

Was she freaking kidding me? Moved past it? I just found out about it. And it is obvious that Loren and Chloe dislike each other so why was Loren pushing me to stay with Chloe? None of this was making sense. Getting answers didn't do anything but leave me with more questions. And more than one suspicion that they were both still lying to me.

" Look I have to go get ready for dinner, " Loren said. " Chloe , you should stay. You and Eddie need some time together and it would be good for you to hang out with everyone. " She looked at Chloe with a tight smile, " just don't insult any of my friends. "

Chloe rolled her eyes again, " wouldn't dream of it."

" Wait a minute, you don't just get to decide that I should forgive Chloe and then invite her to dinner." I said before Loren could walk away, " I am not done talking about this yet. "

" Look, I don't really know what else there is to say. Obviously you were hurt by what Chloe did. I am glad that I was able to distract you from that for a little while but you and Chloe are happy now and it's stupid to throw all that away because of something that you don't even remember. " She moved closer to me and I thought that she might reach out and touch me, hoped for it, but instead she placed her hands by her sides, " I really don't want to see you miserable Eddie. Despite what you might think right now, I do care. Your happiness matters to me and before today, you were happy."

I shook my head, " No I wasn't."

Chloe's head snapped towards me, " What? Really?"

" I haven't been happy since I woke up. How could I be? I am confined to a wheelchair and can't remember months of my life. What is there to be happy about?" I didn't mean to sound so bitter, okay maybe I did.

" But you have a girlfriend who adores you, doesn't that make you happy? " Chloe asked as she put her arm around my shoulders. It took every ounce of willpower I possess to keep from shrugging it off. " I love you Eddie, that hasn't changed."

Loren turned away but before she did, I saw the look on her face. She was hurt. Hearing Chloe say that she loves me hurt her. Yeah, sure end of story. No possible way was a couple of kisses the end of the story. " I really need to go get ready. "

She started to walk by me but I reached out and grabbed her arm. Just like always a shiver made it's way through my body and judging by the way she looked from my hand on her arm to my eyes and then back to my hand again, I was willing to bet she felt one very similiar. "One more thing. I know that you are Love2LuvU." The look on her face was indescribable. " And we are far from done talking about any of this. I know you are still keeping things from me. I am not going to let you keep running away from me. "

"Eddie..."

I shook my head to stop her from speaking, " I know you need to go get ready for the party, but later you and I are going to talk." I released her arm and without another look at me she took off in the direction of her room. I wanted to race after her. I wanted to make her tell me all of it, because I know there is more. I can feel it. I want her to help me remember. I want her to...and just like that the truth hit me upside the head. I wanted her. Even before hearing her conversation with Chloe, I wanted her. I can't pinpoint exactly when it started but I can say for sure that I do. I want Loren Tate.

It wasn't just attraction either. No, it was far more intense than that. This want wasn't a passing attraction or a stupid crush. It was real and it was deep and it definitely wasn't a damn feeling that a guy gets when he is in a rebound relationship.

" Eddie," Chloe called out to me and I looked over to find her sitting on the chair, " what now?"

I had no idea.

" Look I know that you are angry, and you have every right to be." She looked down at her hands, " I am ashamed of the way that I treated you, the things that I did. " Again she sounded sincere, but I didn't know if I could trust it, or her. " I never should have done what I did with Tyler, but I swear to you that it didn't mean anything. "

" It meant something , Chloe."

Standing up, she moved directly in front of me and bent down so that she was eye level with me, " I made a mistake, just like you did with Loren."

Hearing her say that I made a mistake with Loren did something to me that I can't even explain. A feeling that I never felt before came over me and settled itself deep inside of me. Awareness and instinct seemed to flare up. " Loren was not a mistake. " The words came out of my mouth before I could even think about what I was saying. " I care about her. "

Closing her eyes, Chloe exhaled loudly, " I know that, believe me. I don't like it but I won't fight you on it. I promise I will try to get along with her. Just please don't leave me. "

" Chloe, I can't do this right now, ok. I don't want to get into this with you before dinner. People are going to start showing up any minute and I just don't want it to be more ackward than it already promises to be. "

" What the hell did you do to Loren?" Veronica screamed at Chloe as she came stomping into the room. She was wearing a pair of black jeans and a yellow tshirt with her hair hiding under a blue towel and attitude was dripping off her like water.

" What are you talking about? " Chloe asked the other blonde as she stood up and stepped slightly closer to her. " I didn't do anything."

" Right, that's why she is in there right now crying her eyes out. I swear to god, Chloe, you do NOT want to mess with me. I can ruin your life." Veronica pointed a finger in her face and gave her a look that even I knew meant business.

Unfazed, Chloe rolled her eyes, "Oh please, I am not afraid of you."

Veronica laughed, " you have no idea what I am capable of Chloe. I can bring your life down with one phone call or tap of the computer keys. Do not mess with me. And do not mess with my friend."

" It's my fault, " I broke in. Though I had to admit I was enjoying the show. Veronica Mars, wasn't someone I would ever want to mess with. Not after hearing about how she brought down her best friend's sister who just happened to be her boyfriend's father. " I overheard a conversation between Chloe and Loren and confronted them about it. Loren wasn't happy."

Veronica glared at him, " You are only getting this one free pass because I like you and because you helped me out this afternoon. Do not make her cry ever again."

"I guess you aren't mad at her anymore?" I couldn't help but smile at her defensiveness towards Loren.

Moving away from Chloe, Veronica sat on the arm of the chair, " yes I am but she is still my best friend and I will defend her no matter what?" Looking back at Chloe she added, " especially to girls who want nothing more than to see her hurt."

Chloe rolled her eyes again and sat down on the sofa, " you are annoying, has anyone ever told you that."

Veronica got a weird look on her face and then shook it off almost immediately and gave Chloe a small sarcastic smile, " as a matter of fact yes, and I made his life a living hell so take that as a warning." Turning back to me, Veronica raised her eyebrows, " what exactly did you overhear?"

" That Chloe cheated on me and that Loren and I were..." Honestly I don't even know. Chloe and Loren made it seem like it was a rebound situation, but I felt in my soul that it wasn't quite like that, " more than friends."

Veronica smiled, " Well good. Now that the cat is out of the bag that takes a little bit of the pressure off of tonight. "

"Except the whole Logan thing, " I reminded her which earned me a narrowed look. " Just kidding, sorry."

She smiled at me and rolled her eyed good naturedly, " I know. But it's gonna be fine. I am gonna suck it up and get through it. Can I use your bathroom? Loren is in hers."

I nodded and Veronica was on her way. I watched after her with a little smile. She was a different one, that girl. Upset and angry one minute, calm and joking the next.

"What the hell was that?" Chloe demanded as she stood back up and hoisted her hands on her hips, " you were just flirting with Veronica in front of me."

Okay as much as I hate eye rolling, this was a time when it just had to be done and I couldn't help myself so I did it. I rolled my eyes. " I was not. "

" Yes you were and she was flirting with you too. God, I hate that girl."

" You have no reason to. Veronica is a nice person and she is my friend. We had a conversation earlier today and I have a new understanding of her. I was not flirting and neither was she. You need to calm down." Suddenly it was clear to me that this version of Chloe was not the one that I orginally fell in love with. Or maybe this was the real version that I was seeing and the other one, the sweet, funny one was the fake. Either way I didn't like it. " You have no reason to be mad at me. I am not the liar or the cheater in this relationship."

For some reason that made her laugh, " okay sure so then it was my imagination all those nights that you spent fawning over Love2LuvU's lyrics right? You were obsessed with Loren before you even met her."

Oh for the love of..." You are crazy, do you know that? "

" No I am serious Eddie. You were emotionally cheating on me for months before you ever even laid eyes on Loren."

Way to turn everything around on me. No this definitely wasn't the same Chloe I thought I fell in love with. " You know what, I am not going to do this with you right now. We have a lot to talk about but not now. You can stay or go but either way, we are done with this for now. "

Before she could argue the front door opened and Melissa and Adam arrived. It was time to get this dinner started.

_**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**_

An hour into the dinner and I was more miserable than I can ever recall being in my life. It wasn't bad enough that Chloe had decided to stay but she practically glued herself to my side. Her hand was constantly interwined with mine, even when I tried to pull away she found a way to keep touching me. It made me uncomfortable considering the fact that we were in such a bad place right now. At least in my mind. Apparently in hers, all was well.

Add in the hurt expression on Loren's face everytime she looked at the two of us and I pretty much felt like the scum of the earth. Whether we were just a rebound situation or we were more serious, the fact was that something was between Loren and I and it couldn't be easy to see some other girl practically attached to myside. Just like it wasn't easy for me to see the blonde idiot who currently had his arm around the back of Loren's chair constantly try to get her attention.

Cameron Webber had showned up about ten minutes before we started to eat. Apparently he was a part of the West Valley Charter High group and everyone was happy to see him, especially Loren who had run into him earlier in the day and invited him to join us. He seemed like a nice enough guy. That is until he started getting all touchy feely with Loren. He couldn't talk to her without finding a way to touch her hand, or shoulder, or even at one point , her knee. They way he looked at her conveyed the fact that not only did he want her, he was determined to have her. It made me sick. It wasn't lost on me that I was jealous.

It wasn't lost on Melissa or Veronica either. They two of them were constantly sharing secret smiles after looking from me to Cameron. They were clearly amused by this. I am not. Loren seemed completely obvious though.

" So have you two decided on a name for the baby? " Chloe asked trying to insert herself into the conversation that was currently being bounched around the kitchen table.

Adrianna and Phil both nodded and exchanged smiles. And Melissa snorted, " they have but they won't tell anyone. "

The conversation quickly moved from the baby to school. Everyone seemed to participate and I was impressed that everyone seemed to be getting along. Even Veronica and Loren were being friendly despite the tense undertones in the room. And though she would proably never admit to doing it, I saw Veronica look towards the door at least ten times.

Logan Echolls was due to show up twenty minutes ago. Dinner was done and cleaned up already but Loren had sat a plate of food aside for him just in case he still decided to show up. I could tell Veronica was anxious but I wasn't sure if it was because she thought he was still coming or because she thought that he wasn't.

He was coming, I knew he was. I had a feeling. Logan Echolls and I kind of go way back, not that I would have told Veronica that earlier. She was much to upset to hear that Logan and I had met on a movie set a couple of years before his dad was killed. I guess more accurately before his dad lost his mind and became a murderer. Aaron Echolls was the star of the movie and I was just getting into acting and was on set to screen test with him. Logan and his sister had been there that day and Logan and I had bonded over a game of basketball during a break from testing. It was the first and only time I ever met the guy but we did keep in touch via email occasionally. Though I had no idea that he was involved with Veronica Mars. Until this afternoon anyway when she had spilled her guts to me.

" Eddie, " Cameron's voice called out to me and I shook off my thoughts regarding Veronica and Logan. My eyes met his and he smiled slightly, " how is your music coming. Will I be hearing anything new on the radio in the future? "

" No, probably not. " I responded struggling to keep the annoyance out of my voice. " My music is kind of on hold for the moment. " I cast a look towards Loren, " my personal life seems to need my attention focused on it at the moment." Loren looked away from me and focused on Mel who I noticed shoot her a reassuring smile. " But who knows maybe it will inspire me. "

The table fell silent just as a knock sounded on the door. Veronica physically paled as Loren jumped up and made her way towards the door. I looked over at Veronica and she met my eyes so I gave her a reassuring smile as Mel squeezed her hand that was resting on the table. Everyone's eyes seemed to be on Loren who was opening the door.

Logan Echolls smiled at Loren as she gestured for him to come inside. " Thanks," he stepped inside and his eyes immediately scanned through the livingroom to the kitchen. Recognized lite up his brown eyes as he saw me and I gave him a small nodd. "Small world, " he muttered as he moved through the livingroom behind Loren and into the kitchen.

"Everyone, " Loren started as her eyes met Veronica's, " this is Logan. He is an old friend of Veronica's. " He pointed to everyone as she said thier names and introduced Logan. " And this is Eddie, " she said as she reached me sandwiched between Adam and Phil.

" Oh yes, Duran Duran, how are you doing man? It's been a long time."

Everyone at the table seemed to be watching me all of a sudden. " Hey Echolls. "

" You two know each other?" Veronica asked looking at me and still not at Logan. She was shooting daggers and me and all I could do was smirk.

" We, ah, he audtioned for a movie with my father a couple of years ago. " Logan explained moving to stand behind Veronica's chair. " Hey Veronica."

Still not looking at him, Veronica responded with a simple, " Hello Logan." She picked up her wine glass and took a long swallow and Loren pulled on Logan's arm to direct him to the empty chair on the other side of where she was sitting. He let out a frustrated sigh as he went. I knew exactly how he was feeling. It wasn't that long ago, just yesterday in fact, that Loren did the same thing to me. Being ignored was the pits.

Logan took the seat and shot me a nervous look. I tried to give him an encouraging smile but judging by the tense set of Veronica's shoulders and her sudden interest in the red liquid in front of her, I doubt that he felt very encouraged.

" Do you want a glass of wine, Logan? " Loren asked reaching for the bottle that was resting in the middle of the table next to a bottle of sparkling cider for Adrianna.

Before he could answer Veronica spoke up, " No. Logan doesn't need to drink alcohol. " Now she did look at him but only quickly and with a glare. " He doesn't handle it well."

" Ah glad to see some things never change. Veronica Mars still has no faith in me. "

Veronica stood up and full on glared at Logan, " Do not even start that crap with me Echolls. I had faith in you once and you slapped me in the face with it. " Turning to Loren now she continued with the glare which actually freaked me out a little, " and thank you very much, friend, for inviting him."

" Seriously Veronica, get over yourself. " Chloe chimed in from her spot beside me because things simply weren't ackward and tense enough already. I simply sat there shaking my head. This was not going to go over well.

Right on cue, Melissa stood up next to Veronica, " Its none of your business Chloe so butt out. You have no idea what is even happening here." Melissa used her hand to gestured between Logan and Veronica, " It's been them."

" But of course Princess Loren is at the center of it. " Chloe added snidely. " It was okay for her to butt her nose into Veronica's business, though right? "

" Wow...you Valley peeps sure know how to bring the drama, " Logan remarked reaching towards the middle of the table where the two bottles sat. Veronica's eyes never left his hand and he picked up the bottle of cider and poured a fair amount in the glass that was sitting in front of him. " And Veronica, just so you know, I was going to decline Loren's offer. I haven't had a drink of anything containing alcohol for awhile now. " He lifted the glass to his lips and smiled at her, " But hey thanks for letting me know right up front that you are the same old Veronica. "

Veronica sat back down and looked guilty at Logan, " I'm sorry. Old habits die hard, I guess."

He shrugged his shoulders, " its my fault for thinking that maybe enough time has passed for us to let bygones be bygones. "

" Ok, you know what, " Mel said sitting back down herself, " let just stop all this craziness right now and remember that we are all here for the same reason...to try and be friends and get to know each other better. " She pointed to Loren , " Loren and Eddie didn't invite us here to air dirty laundry or claw each other's eyes out. So I say that we all take a deep breath and play a get to know you game."

" Oh god, " Phil and Adam replied in tandem earning them each a dirty look from the brunette.

" Seriously, lets play Never Have I Ever, "

Loren shook her head, " No, way. "

" Come on Lo, it will be fun, " this came from Adrianna. " Please? It's been forever since I have played that. "

Obviously annoyed at her inability to say no to the pregnant girl , Loren let out a shakey breath, "fine."

Adrianna and Mel smiled triumphantly.

I on the other hand did not, " Um...I don't know what that is. "

All eyes turned towards me and a few mouths fell open in shock as well. Apparently this game is a right of teenage passage.

At least according to Mel as she explained it to me. " Basically everytime someone says something that you have done, you have to take a drink. Here how about Cam, Adam, Loren, Phil and I do an example." After making sure that everyone had something in thier glass, Mel pretending to ponder a question. " Oh okay, Never Have I Ever dreamed of a music career."

Loren and Adam shared a look and then each of them took a drink while Cameron and Mel did not. Okay easy enough. It wasn't exactly brain surgery. " Got it. " And as I looked around the table, I knew that I really did. It was being used as a get to know you game but I planned to use it as a get to the truth game. Loren and Veronica were already extremely uncomfortable, Chloe looked like she would rather be eating nails than be hanging out with these people and Logan kept looking longingly at the wine bottle in the middle of the table. Cameron seemed to have a secret smile on his face that I wanted to reach over and smack off while Adam and Phil exchanged nervous looks. And last but definitely not least Adrianna and Melissa looked thrilled. I guess I am not the only one with a plan. I had to admire the girls for thier creativity and I sent a little prayer upstairs that they were doing this to support the same cause as me.

" Ok, I will start, " Adrianna declared lifted up her glass. " Never Have I Ever cheated on someone." Oh low blow.

My eyes went around the table. Phil, Adrianna, Melissa, Adam, Cameron, and Loren all left thier glasses sitting on the table. I did as well. Veronica lifted her glass and took a drink, as did Logan. Chloe remained unmoved but Mel and Loren both glared at her. Before either of them could say anything, I did it for them, " take a drink Chloe."

That earned me a glare of course but she did as she was told.

" Who the hell did you cheat on?" Logan asked Veronica forcing my eyes off of Chloe and onto him.

She let out an annoyed breath, " Deputy Leo," she glared at him again and if looks could kill my old pal wouldn't still be with us. " With you. Remember I was dating him our junior year, but made out with you twice before I ever broke up with him. In my opinion, kissing is cheating. "

" Oh, " was all Logan could muster up. I almost chuckled at his expression but managed to keep it in.

" Okay then, Which one of you three wants to go next?" Mel asked.

" I will, " Logan volunteered and I had a feeling this wasn't going to be good. " Never have I ever accused someone of murder."

Again my eyes went around the table and I could feel them widen as not only Veronica, but Loren, Melissa, Adrianna all took drinks as well. What the hell? " Ok, does this game come with explanations?"

" Nope ,sorry, " Loren replied quickly casting a look towards Chloe whose face was the ideal of angry. " Mel you go next."

" Never Have I Ever, had a crush on someone. "

This time everyone drank. That was an easy one obviously. Since I drank during that one I figured now would be a good time for me to take my turn. " I will go next." I didn't even pretend not to look at Loren when I left the words come out of my mouth. " Never Have I Ever looked someone in the eyes and lied through my teeth about my relationship with them.


	9. Chapter 6 Part 1

**A/N: Okay ladies...I have made some decisions about this fic. In order to be able to post updates sooner, I am not going to be making them quite so long. In fact this update is considerably shorter than the last couple have been. It takes a long time to plot out chapters that long and then even longer to write them. School will be out for the summer in less than 7 weeks so that means that I will have my oldest son here everyday in addition to my stepdaughter who recently came to live with us plus my two littlest ones and chances are pretty good that I won't have as much time to write. Another decision I have made is that each chapter is only going to have either Loren or Eddie's POV and not both. Other people may be added in occasionally but mostly from here on out the story will either involve one or the other. For instance this chapter is strictly Loren POV and the next will be Eddie's. Since I am doing that...I will be having two parts to each chapter. This is part 1. I will have the next part up next Sunday :) I hope that you guys will understand why I am doing things like this. **

**Also, a lot of you questioned where Ian was in the last chapter...don't worry...he's in this one. I didn't forget him. He will be playing a pretty big part in the upcoming chapters...lets just call him our little Chloe wrangler shall we? **

**I had planned to check this out for grammer and spelling earlier today but I didn't get the chance because I was sorting through a mountain of laundry. I imagine that there are a million mistakes. I am so sorry but please look past them. **

**One last things for those of you who have emailed me about Veronica Mars...the movie is being made and it will be out sometime in 2014 :) The kickstarter fundraiser was a huge sucess to raise the money needed to make the film and we met all of Kristen Bell and Rob Thomas ( the creater of Veronica Mars) goals. According to the last email update I got from Rob ( yes I donated to the fund and became a backer of the film ) the script is finished and most of the key cast members have signed on to do the movie :) **

**As always, I do not own anything but the plotline :) **

**Please review...I am very nervous about this chapter.**

As if things weren't already awkward enough in the room, everyone's eyes fell upon me as Eddie's question challenge hung in the air. Even Chloe had her eyes trained on me, granted they were full of hate, but still on me. But my eyes, they were focused on one thing only, Eddie's eyes. I couldn't look away even as I raised my glass to my lips and swallowed a mouth full of the red liquid. I didn't know if anyone else took a drink or not, and honestly it didn't matter because this was between Eddie and I now and every single person at the table knew it.

" Wow, I am surprised you did that, " Eddie admitted not taking his eyes off me. I could see that he was testing me, the tone of his voice and the slight flash in his eyes told me so, but I wasn't going to let him get to me. He already knew too much.

I raised my glass again and put it towards my lips, " It's a game about telling the truth. "

He snorted. Eddie Duran snorted. " Exactly."

Okay so now he was baiting me. Did he really want to do this in front of all these people? Of course it's not like any of them don't know what is going on so I guess it doesn't really matter. " So you called me out. How do you know it's you I lied to? "

He shrugged his shoulders and gave me a sexy smile. Way too sexy, because I felt that fimiliar feeling in my stomach. The one that reminded me just how much this guy affected me and that there would probably never be another to do the same. " I know you aren't being completely honest with me, Loren. What I don't really understand is why. Why can't you just tell me the whole story?"

" I did." I wasn't a fan of lying and I really did hate myself for it, but this is for the best. Eddie doesn't need to know how I feel about him. Especially because he doesn't feel the same way. And I don't need to see him pretend like he feels something for me when he doesn't. " Why can't you understand that and just leave it alone?"

He looked around at the table, " Probably because every single person at this table knows more about my life than I do. Every single one of them knows that you and I were together."

" You were never officially together, " Chloe interferred.

"Shut up Chloe, " Melissa, Adrianna, Veronica, and Phil shouted in tandom. Of course they never took thier eyes off me. I guess I couldn't blame them. They have been waiting for this showdown for awhile now.

" I don't know what I can do to convince you. " Hopefully he would just decided to believe me. I knew that wouldn't happen but I was a dreamer at heart. I hated lying to him, but what choice did I have? I couldn't bare to know that he knew the truth and he still choose Chloe over me, because in my mind undoubtedly that is what will happen. Right now he is angry about the lies and the whole Tyler debacle but it will wear off and Chloe will be able to convince him of her love and thier love together and then once again, I will be on the outside looking in. So I may as well just stay there right now and save myself a whole lot of time and heartache.

He shook his head, obvisouly distressed that I wouldn't just open my mouth and tell him every single detail of his life since he came back to California after his tour. He was about to say something when there was a knock at the door. Before I could get up to answer it, Mel jumped out of her seat and practically ran to it. She swung it open and pulled the newcomer inside. I didn't look away from Eddie and he didn't look away from me, but I could tell that Ian had arrived. I could smell his coglone...it was a spicy woodsy combination.

He took in the mood of the room rather quickly without anyone having to tell him anything as he took a seat next to Logan. " Do I wanna know what lead up to this," I heard him whisper as he poured himself a glass of wine. " I knew I should have never answered that call from my mum. I always miss the good stuff. " He seemed to be enjoying this as much as everyone else. It was rather annoying.

" So you are just going to keep lying to my face?" Eddie asked with a look that told me that no matter how many interuptions we have, this is never going to go away. " You and everyone esle." He used his hand to sweep around the table to indicate that everyone was lying to him. " Every single person at this table, with the exception of Logan, has lied to me every day since I woke up. Because you told them to. They did it for you, not for me. You. "

I didn't know what to say to that because he was right. I asked them to lie. I thought it was for the best but now that I could see that it Eddie Eddie, I could admit that it was a bad idea. I never should have asked Ian and the others who now considered Eddie thier friend to choose sides. In retrospect that is exactly what they did. They chose me because otherwise they wouldn't have lied. They would have just told him the truth and not cared how I felt about it. " I am sorry, Eddie. I never should have asked everyone to keep our friendship a secret from you."

" Friendship, " he raised his eyebrows at me, " come on Loren, we have never been just friends. "

Was it getting hot in this room? It certainly felt as though it was 100 degrees in here all of a sudden. Or maybe it was the fact that I felt on the hot seat and from the determination, among other things, floating around in eyes eyes, I wasn't getting off of it anytime soon. He wasn't going to drop this and I couldn't keep letting the others hide things from him. It wasn't fair then and it's not fair now. " What do you want from me?"

" I want the truth Loren. "

" Ok, look mate, things were complicated. " Ian broke into the converstation and I pulled my eyes from the grip Eddie's seem to have on them to look at him. " It's not Loren's fault ok. She came into this by circumstance. "

"What does that mean, " Eddie asked with anger radiating from his voice as he too looked at his best friend.

" It means , " he stopped to glare at Chloe before continuing again, " she made it possible for you to turn to Loren for comfort after your relationship blew up. Loren did not ask to be brought into this life but she earned her way in and got to be friends with you as a conselation prize, " Ian smiled at Eddie and joked, "and from years of experience I can attest that it is indeed a conselation prize." Becoming serious once again, Ian focused his attention on me. " Loren did what she thought was best. She was by your side in that hospital every single day, mate. She only left because her mother practically carried her out. She didn't keep things from you because she doesn't care about you, she did it because she does. "

I gave him my best smile to thank him for defending me but noticed that Eddie was narrowing his eyes at his best friend. Oh no. He was mad at Ian for defending me. I couldn't let that happn. I couldn't be the reason that Eddie was upset with Ian. " Thank you for defending me Ian, but it isn't necessary. I asked all of you to keep my relationship with Eddie a secret and it wasn't fair. I am so sorry to all of you. " Turning my eyes back to Eddie, I gave him a small smile, " and I am sorry that you were hurt my the choices that I made. I really do believe that it was best for you not to know because it doesn't change anything. "

"It changes everything, Loren. " He was back to giving me that intese stare of his. It seriously made me crazy that he could make me feel so much with just a look in his eyes. " How can you not see that?"

" Because Eddie, you still don't remember. " Chloe butted in again, " She doesn't want to be with you if you can't remember her. Loren is selfish like that. But I want to be with you no matter what."

" Loren is selfish?" Melissa made her way into the conversation now and I just knew it was about to turn into a free for all. " You can't really be serious right now. You begged Loren to not tell Eddie that the two of you were broken up before his accident. You begged her to just sit back and let you destroy his life again. "

" And she made the choice to do that. " Chloe defended with an eyeroll to Mel.

" Wait, " Eddie's voice was raised as he turned towards Chloe, " you and I weren't back together before that night?"

Realizing her mistake, Melissa shot me a look that screamed her apology and sat back in her chair. Great. I guess the truth was gonna be all out by the end of the night.

Chloe seemed to be searching for something to say but Veronica jumped in to save the day, " Ok while this is interesting and all, can we please get back to the game. You guys are giving me a headache." I knew it was her way of rescuing me from this and I sent her a relieved smile across the table. She didn't smile back. I still had a lot of ammends to make where she was concerned. " Never have I ever, gone skinny dipping."

Logan chuckled and Veronica sent him the death glare but it didn't seem to phase him. " Wow Ronnie, that's orginal. "

" Do not call me Ronnie, and shut up. " She lifted her glass to her mouth and took a long sip.

As did everyone else at the table. Except me. And Cameron. Well...wasn't that ackward. He smiled at me and I gave him a smile, which Eddie noticed because it was his turn to use the death glare and he sent it out to Cameron. Cam was still looking at me though so he didn't notice. Chloe did though and I was rewarded with a death glare of my own. Yes, this dinner had been a great idea.

" When did you go skinny dipping? The last time we played this game you hadn't" Logan bellowed to Veronica with nothing but jealous in his voice. "More importantly who did you go with?"

Veronica rolled her blue eyes and smiled at Melissa, who she was looking at in an attempt not to look at Logan. " That was a very long time ago, Logan. Lots of things have changed since then. And just so you know..I didn't do it with anyone. Troy waited in the limo."

" Troy? VanderGraff? For the love of god, Veronica." Logan obviously wasn't happy about that little piece of information and now all eyes were on the two of them.

And finally, Veronica turned her blue eyes to Logan. " Don't worry it was before the two of you went to Mexico on your drug run. "

" I had nothing to do with that. "

Veronica laughed, " Of course not because you are a saint. "

" What the hell is your problem? " Logan bellowed again.

Oh boy. Seems we were going to take turns being the center of attention, Veronica and I. At least we could use that to bond later and hopefully put our friendship back on track. Veronica took a deep breath before opening her mouth and I knew this wasn't going to be pretty. " My problem is that you are here. My problem is that I trusted you and you let me down. My problem is that despite everything I can't stop missing you. My problem is that I can't hate you no matter how much I want to. "

Everyone's eyes shifted to Logan as he opened his mouth and then closed it again immediately. Obvously he wasn't expecting that little outburst and since my eyes were still on Veronica, I could see that she had surprised herself with it.

" Well its good to know that all hope isn't lost, " Logan replied finally pulling himself together. " Veronica, I am sorry. I don't know what else I am supposed to say to make it better. "

She shook her head, " I don't know if there is anything, Logan. I can't keep going around and around with you. It hurts to much when the ride stops. "

Her honesty surprised me. Veronica was probably the one person in the world I knew understood my fear of being completely honest with Eddie because she dealt with the same thing where Logan was concerned. Now, though, now it seems as though I am on my own.

" I don't want to hurt you , Veronica. I have never wanted that. " Logan got up and moved to stand behind Veronica's chair. He pulled it out and turned her so that she was facing him and he knealt down so that he was face to face with her. " It kills me to know that I did that to you. It wasn't my intention. I don't know why I do the things that I do. " He reached up and touched her face, " I love you Veronica. I always have and I truly believe that I always will. "

Veronica reached up and cupped Logan's cheek with her own hand and I felt my heart start racing for her, " I love you too Logan." She admitted the thing that feared her the most to the shock of probably everyone at the table. " But I can't keep doing this with you. We are good for a little while and then it all blows up. Love isn't enough for us Logan." She pulled her hand away and rested it in her lap.

But Logan obviously wasn't ready to lose contact with her because he grabbed her hand and put it back on his face. " It is enough. I screwed up Veronica, I know it and you know it. I am not the same guy anymore. I promise you that I have changed. All I am asking for is a chance. "

I was sure that Veronica was going to turn him down. I mean we had countless conversations about all the reasons that she and Logan just couldn't work out. However, she surprised me. " I want to give you a chance Logan. We still have a lot to talk about and I have to deal with Piz, but I want to at least talk about what we do with what is between us. "

She was really going to give into him and try to repair thier relationship. I didn't know if I was more surprised or worried. I never expected Veronica to give in. She has always been so sure in the fact that they could never work out. But now she was practically falling at his feet. Glancing over to Eddie, I found him looking at me again. Okay nevermind, I totally get it. There is just something about that certain guy that just gets you every time. For instance, the way that Eddie was looking at me right now, longingly, made me want to turn into a puddle at his feet.

"Well that was just lovely, can we get back to the game please?" Chloe said as she poured more wine into her glass and immediately took a long swig of it. She had her eyes planted on Eddie and was obviously not happy that his attention was on me. I wasn't exactly happy about it either but there wasn't anything I could do.

Adrianna cleared her throat, " I would like to take my turn next if no one minds. " She picked up her glass full of sparkling cider and shared a look with Mel as Logan stood up and placed a small smile on Veronica's forehead before he went back to his chair. I noticed out of the corner of my eye that Mel gave Adriana a slight nod. Suddently I had a very bad feeling about this. " Never have I ever been part of a text spoof. "

Oh my god. I watched in horror as Adrianna drank from her cup. " You?"

She nodded once. " Yes, I helped."

"What do you mean by you helped?" I asked hearing the anger in my voice but not caring.

Adrianna looked over at Chloe who was glaring at her in shock, " You need to take a drink , Chloe. " Looking away from her and straight to me, she at least had guilt swimming around in her eyes. " I am so sorry, Loren. It was before you and I started being friends and I just wanted to hurt you. Chloe came to me and I agreed to help her. "

" I can't believe that you were responsible for that. How could you do that to Loren?" Phil spoke up from beside his wife. I was actually surprised not only by the fact that he didn't know about her involvement but that he was defending me. Sure we had made peace awhile ago but Phil and I have never been extremely close.

Adrianna's eyes filled with tears as she turned to her husband, " I don't know. It was stupid, ok. I know that but I was just so mad that my dad was all about Loren and that everything was going so well for her. I wanted to do something to mess up her life. "

" The calculus test wasn't enough?" This came from Adam who was rewarded for interupting with an elbow to the gut curtesy of his girlfriend.

" I know, I am a horrible person, okay. " She looked back to me and the tears were falling freely down her face. " I was jealous. You were getting so much attention and I just wanted to do something to make you look bad. I really am sorry, Lo. I didn't know you back then. "

She was right. She didn't know me, not really, because she didn't want to. She was mean to me for no other reason than because she was jealous. I understood that and we were able to work through all the juvinelle stuff and put it behind us.

" Loren, I swear to you that all I did was give Chloe a list of phone numbers, she did the rest. "

All eyes turned to Chloe. She had the nerve to roll her eyes. " Seriously? This is so not important. "

" Of course you would think so since you are the one responsible for doing it. " Melissa spoke up. " Don't you ever get tired of being pathetic?"

" Look whose talking? How long are you going to ride Loren's coattails to fame and fortune?"

This was only getting worse by the minute. I needed to do something before it got out of hand. Unfornately before I could do or say anyting, Ian decided that he needed to jump in. " I don't know what a text spoof is or why everyone is so upset about it, but I actually would like to hear the answer to the lovely Melissa's question. " He turned his penatrating eyes to Chloe, " when are you going to stop being so pathetic? "

Ignoring him, Chloe turned to Eddie, " Are you just going to sit there and let everyone gang up on me? You aren't even going to defend me?"

Giving her a long look, Eddie picked up his glass and lifted it to his lips, " Maybe you should call Tyler. I bet he would defend you to death."

Oh my god.

" Damn, mate. What did I miss?" Ian wondered sitting back in his chair and casting a look of completely adoration towards his best friend. He was proud of that little comment.

" Eddie knows that truth about Chloe, " Melissa filled Ian in. " And about his short relationship with Loren..." Melissa turned so that Eddie couldn't see her face but that Ian could and I knew that she was mouthing something to him that would let him know that Eddie knew some of the truth about our relationship but not really all of it.

Standing up, I moved to the back of my chair and pushed it in, " I think that maybe we either need to find something else to do, that doesn't involve quite so much talking, or we need to call it a night. "

" No. Come on now, Loren. We are just getting this party started, " Eddie protested draining what was left in his glass and reaching for the bottle to refill it. " We are all friends here, right? Aren't friends supposed to play games like this? "

" No, they aren't. Not when we are just fishing for information and being mean to one another. That's not what this dinner was supposed to be all about. "

He finished pouring wine into his glass and sat the bottle back down, " No you are right. It was supposed to be about you and I trying to be friends and celebrating that with our friends." He took another drink and then slammed the glass down on the table causing some of the red liquid to spill. " But it turns out that you and all of my so called friends have been doing nothing but lying to me since I woke up in that damn hospital room. " Turning to Chloe, he added, " and that my girlfriend is a cheating liar as well. " He took lifted his glass for another drink but I was faster and grabbed it out of his hands. " Hey."

"You have had enough." Eddie was quickly on his way to becoming drunk and I wasn't about to let that happen. Not when he was so angry. " In fact, I think that we have all had enough. Phil and Adam can you guys clean up for me. " The guys stood to do what I asked. " The rest of you can do whatever, but Eddie and are going outside to have a little chat. " I turned my eyes back to him, " Do I need to push you or can you make it on your own?"

His glare was response enough. I headed to the patio door and didn't bother to turn to see if he was following me, I could hear the sounds of his wheelchair. Before I fully reached the door, Chloe made it and stood in front of it. " Eddie, I think that you and I need to talk before you hear anything she has to say. "

"Move Chloe, " his voice was deadly serious and she heard it just as well as I did but she remained standing there, blocking the door.

Ian, ever the helpful best friend, stood up and made his way to the door and physically picked Chloe up and removed her from our way. " You really need to learn to listen when people talk to you. " He scolded her.

I opened the door and moved so that Eddie could follow me. Once he was out, I peeked my head through the door and told Mel to make sure the kitchen window was closed and to close the curtain on the patio door before I closed the door. Before I even turned around to face Eddie, Mel was pulling the curtain shut. If nothing else, Eddie and I definitely had brillant taste when it came to choosing friends. Melissa and Ian are the best in the world.

It was dark outside and the night air was warm. I could hear the sounds of the crickets and random animals running around in the wooded area behind my house. The outside light provided enough that we were able to make our way over to the pinic table. I pulled a chair away so that Eddie could slide his wheelchair in and then I moved to go around to the other side so I could sit facing him. He however had other ideas and grabbed my arm before I could get to far away. It was pointless at this point to even think about the shivers his touch always caused. " Sit next to me. " There wasn't much point in arguing with him as he pulled the chair next to him around so that it was facing him. I slide into it. "Where should we start?"

"How about you tell me why you are being such a jerk? You don't act like this Eddie. " I have seen him angry before, but never like this.

" How am I supposed to act Loren? My life already sucked but then I found out that everyone in my life lied to me. What is my reaction to that supposed to be?"

I sighed because I really didn't know how to answer his questions. There really was no answer. " I don't know how many times you want me to apologize to you."

" I don't want your apology, Loren. I want the truth." He reached over and took my hand. " I want to know why every time I touch you, my body shivers. Or why I can't stop thinking about you. I want to know why if we were nothing more than a stupid fling or a meaningless rebound, my heart hurts so much when you walk away from me. "

What was I supposed to say to that. " I don't know. "

" I think that you do. I think that you feel the same way. " He let go of my hand and touched my face. Again I shivered and I am pretty sure that my heart was beating way too fast and that I would probably have a heart attack any minute now. Cupping the back of my head with his other hand, he pulled me forward, " I know that you feel the same way. "

My beath caught in my thought and my head was spinning but I managed to compose myself enough to ask the only question I could. " What do you want from me?"

He gave me a way too sexy smile and I swallowed thickly as I watched his brown eyes travel from my eyes to my lips back to my eyes again. " I want, " he started as he leaned slightly forward, " you to kiss me."


	10. Chapter 6 part 2

**AN: SURPRISE! I am posting a day early. I was sooo completely overwhelmed by all the responses I got for the last update. I woke up the next morning to over 20 reviews. I was blown away and to say that I am appreciative doesn't seem like nearly enough. But I am. I hope that you all know that. **

**Okay this is a short one, but hopefully a good one as it has some things that you have been waiting for in it. There is going to be some pretty intense drama coming up so hopefully this will sort of make up for it. And if not I guess I will just have to write another cheesy update in the future. LOL! Anyway, this first part is in Melissa's POV (who is a hard character to write by the way..lol ) just to give you guys a look at what is going on inside while Leddie is outside. Don't worry, even though not everyone is talked about or speaks up...no one has left the party...YET. **

**Oh and I was going to check for grammer and spelling but then I couldn't post it til tomorrow and I am busy most of the day tomorrow so that would have turned into another day and well it's up so please just pretend that all my spelling, grammer, and other crap is perfect. **

**DISCLAIMER...I still don't own them...If I did, we would be in the middle of season 2 by now :) **

**Reviews are my inspiration so please inspire me :) **

**Melissa POV**

" I really need to know what is going on out there. " Chloe said for the fifth time in the five minutes since Eddie and Loren had disappeared out the door in the kitchen. She was sandwiched between Logan and Ian on the sofa in the Tate's livingroom with both men holding her down. It was hysterical for me to see her being practically tied down and completely out of control.

Logan tightened his grip on her upper arm and pulled her back down when the blonde attemtped to stand up, " You aren't going anywhere near that backyard so you may as well embrace the quality bonding time with the rest of us. "

She glared across the room to where Veronica was sitting with Phil and Adrianna, " Call off your boytoy Veronica. "

Veronica smiled and shook her head, " The thing about Logan is that he doesn't take direction very well. He kind of always does what he wants to do. " She moved closer to where Chloe was sitting and bent down so that she was eye level with her, " and even if he would listen, I still wouldn't call him off. Eddie and Loren are going to talk and you are going to have to live with the fact that your little charade is over. Eddie knows what a lying bitch you are now. You don't really believe that you can talk him into taking you back do you?"

" You don't know anything about my relationship with Eddie."

I moved beside Veronica and shared a small smile with her, " you don't have one anymore, Chloe. Its just a matter of time before he ends it again. " I moved my eyes to the door, " and then he will be with who he belongs with."

" This is Loren's fault. She is the one who put this whole lie into motion."

Ian rolled his gorgoreus eyes, " She didn't tell you to pretend that nothing ever happened between you and Tyler. She went along with your brillant idea to be with Eddie because he asked for you when he woke up and she believes that he loves you. "

" Because he does. " She was adament in her declaration but everyone else in the room exchanged an eyeroll.

It was pathetic really. Chloe was a beautiful model who could probably have any man that she wants yet she fixates herself on the one man that she all of a sudden loves. If she really ever loved Eddie, she wouldn't have cheated on him in the first place. Not even with a man that looks like Tyler Roarke. He is handsome, but not even close to the calliber that Eddie Duran is. And if you are truly in love with someone, another person doesn't even enter into your mind. Sure, flirting is one thing, but taking it to the next level is just simply unforgivable. Eddie didn't forgive Chloe the first time he found out about it and he wouldn't know. I didn't need a crystal ball to know that. And neither did anyone else in the room. Except apparently the cheater herself. "Are you really that blind, Chloe? Or are you just in denial?"

"What are you talking about you little twit. " She spat the words in my direction. Her blue eyes were filled with anger and hate. I would have felt bad for her sitaution if she was anyone but the girl who tried to make my best friend's life miserable. On second thought...maybe I wouldn't. Chloe created this mess all on her own.

" Eddie is clearly falling for Loren, " I told her with a smug smile. " He couldn't take his eyes off of her all night and he was totally baiting her during that game. Maybe Eddie woke up believing that the two of you were still a couple, but that didn't stop him from wanting Loren." It amazed me that she was so beyond stupid. " It didn't even matter that she moved away. He still wanted her. "

" You know what they say, " Logan spoke up from beside Chloe but his eyes were focused solely on the blonde beside me, " absence only makes the heart grow fonder."

In all the months that I have known Veronica, become friends with her, I have never seen her blush. Not even when the bagel guy down the block from the apartment that V and Loren shared in San Deigo would slip her an extra bagel every morning along with the request for her phone number. She never gave it to him of course but it was fun to watch the few times I visited. But now the pale colored skin on her cheeks were flaming red and her blue eyes were sparkling. She looked even prettier than she usual was. If I didn't love her so much I would so hate her.

" You guys are Loren's friends so of course you think that Eddie loves her, but he doesn't. He loves me. " She was clearly in denial. Disgustingly so.

Phil came to sit on the coffee table and shook his head at Chloe. I can remember a time that he actually thought that she was pretty, I would bet that no he just that she was crazy. " We happen to be Eddie's friends too. "

"Oh please. You guys don't even know him. You are friends with him by association."

" Maybe thats how it started out, " my big brother responded. " But we geniuelly care about Eddie and we want him to be happy. Thats why we all agreed to keep our mouths shut when Loren decided not to fill Eddie in on thier relationship, " he pointed his index finger in Chloe's face, " and why we agreed to go along with this joke of a relationship between you and him. So don't you dare imply that we don't care about Eddie. Every thing we have done is because we want him to be happy."

I was actually glad to be related to Phil in that moment. It made me happy to see him stick up for his friendship with Eddie. Phil didn't have many friends, well many that were a good influence on him anymore. He and Eddie seemed to really hit it off when they were introduced after Eddie woke up and Phil made it a point to always invite Eddie to hang out or to just drop by and chat with him. I was proud of him. I knew that Adrianna was as well. Phil has come a long way since all the trouble with Dr Masters and Colorado. He learned his lessons and was a better person because of it. Too bad that Chloe couldn't follow in his footsteps. No, she would never change, I was certain. She would always be obsessed with Eddie and getting him back so that she would further her pathetic career.

" You all think that you are so much better than me don't you?" Chloe asked looking around the room at all of us scattered about the Tate livingroom. No one in the room gave a damn about Chloe or her feelings and we have all made that relatively clear to her. " Well, you don't know a damn thing about me or my relationship with Eddie. I love him. He belongs with me. And I will get him back. "

Veronica and I shared a look and just shook our heads. The girl was completey insane. There was nothing anyone in this room could say that would make her understand that this was over for her. Eddie wouldnt be her boyfriend anymore after tonight. We all saw the writing on the wall. Even if my best friend didn't get her butt in gear and fight for her man, Chloe wouldn't be with Eddie anymore. It was sad really that her downfall would be so painful for her, but given all that she has pulled on Loren and Eddie, I couldn't find it in me to reach out and be friendly towards her. Let her fall, let it be hard, and let the effects be lasting. It was what she deserved afterall.

_**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**_

_**EDDIE POV**_

She wanted to run away. I could see it in her eyes. I tightened my grip on the back of her neck just enough to make it impossible for her to move away and I drew her face even closer to me. It was the best that I could do since I couldn't exactly run after her if she ran away. " Are you tired of running from me?" I whispered.

She nodded once and looked down at my lips.

"Then just stop, " I closed the distance between us by leaning as far up in my wheelchair as possible and pulled her the rest of the way. Just before I took her lips, I whispered again " Just kiss me."

And she did. Her lips were soft and warm and I felt myself getting lost in them more than I probably should have. I couldn't help myself. Kissing Loren was way different than kissing Chloe. It wasn't just because Loren actually participated rather than making me do all the work, but kissing her caused my body to come alive. I felt shivers and shudders and pulsing in places that I haven't in longer than I can even remember.

Pulling back from the kiss, Loren smiled at me, " are you happy now?"

I smiled back and nodded because quite honestly yes I was happy. At least right now in this moment, I was. She hadn't run from me or pulled away as soon as our lips met, like I have expected her to. Instead Loren had kissed me back. She had explored the depths of my mouth just as I had hers. " That wasn't so bad, was it?"

" I never said kissing you was bad, Eddie."

My hand remained on the back of her neck and I let my fingers rub against the hair that rested there, " no, you never said that. " The thumb of my other hand drew lazy circles at the corner of her lips. " But if I hadn't intiated this, you never would have. "

" You have a girlfriend, Eddie. " She reminded me. Or maybe she was reminding both of us that I hadn't dealt with the Chloe situation yet. " I am not in the business of breaking up relationships." She placed her hand over mine as it rested on her cheek, " I didn't come between you and Chloe the first time and I won't this time either. "

Her honesty was refreshing and annoying at the same time. I didn't want her to come between Chloe and I. She didn't need to. Chloe's lying and cheating had done that and it was all on her. " Chloe and I are done. You get that don't you?"

She looked down at her lap and the action spoke volumes to me. She didn't get that. She doesn't believe that I am through with Chloe after tonight. " Loren, look at me. " She brought her eyes up to meet mine. The worry and uncertainity were there and it just about knocked the wind out of me. Had I really choosen Chloe over her in the past? I couldn't believe that I would be stupid enough to make a mistake like that but maybe I had. " Even before everything that happened in there tonight and what I heard this afternoon, my relationship with Chloe was slowly coming to an end. "

Surprise replaced the other emotions in her eyes. " What do you mean?"

" Chloe and I want different things. She wants to get married and I don't. Not now and honestly when I think about that time in my life when I am ready for marriage, Chloe isn't the person I picture myself with." It was enough of the truth for Loren to understand right now. She really didn't need to know that for the last two months everytime Chloe brought up weddings all I could picture in my head was a brown haired girl walking towards me with a long white veil covering her face. I didn't need a shrink to tell me what that means. " She wants me to get back into acting, I don't want that. She has all these plans for our future and I don't want to take part in any of them. " I did feel bad about that but she was just moving faster than I could deal with right now. I had more important things that I needed to focus on and none of them included beach houses or white picket fences.

Loren crinkled her forehead, " of course not. Your recovery is the most important thing right now. And then you need to concentrate on getting back in the studio. " I smiled and nodded as she continued her little rant, " You need to get your butt out of that chair so you can get back on the stage. "

" Exactly. Sometimes I think that Chloe doesn't even see the wheelchair, you know? She just goes on about her life making all these plans and just expects me to be able to keep up. " It was annoying as hell because not only couldn't I keep up literally but I didn't want to. My focus and determination right now is to be able to walk. Entertaining is a close second on my list but before I got back out there, I wanted to be able to walk on a stage rather than wheel onto one.

" Maybe she doesn't want to dwell on the wheelchair because she is afraid to hurt your feelings." Loren suggested pulling her hand off mine at her check and resting it on the arm of my chair. I moved my hand as well and brought it down to clasp hers. I wasn't ready to break the feelings that our touch brought out in my body.

She was right though, Chloe pretended that my chair was invisible because she thinks thats what I want but its not. "This chair is a part of me now, Loren. Until I am able to walk, it will continue to be. "

" I know that. The wheelchair doesn't bother me. "

" I know it doesn't. " Loren never let her eyes drift to the wheelchair when we are having a conversation unless she is talking about it. I noticed that none of her friends do that either. They focus on my face, whereas Jake, Kelly, Chloe, they all look at the chair constantly during conversations with me. It clearly bothers them. And that bothers me too. " You have never made me feel insecure about being crippled. "

She rolled her eyes, " you are not crippled you idiot. You just can't walk right now. But you will again someday. Someday soon I am sure. Stop feeling sorry for yourself. " She pulled her hand out from under mine and reached up to touch my face this time, " You are the strongest, bravest guy that I have ever met and I have more faith in you then you do yourself obviously. You will walk again. You will sing again. " She was firm and I didn't dare agrue with her or the fact that my heart soared at her faith in me. No one has ever, asside from Pop and my Ma, had that much faith in my abilities to do anything.

" Does this faith in me include the return of my memory?" It killed me to know that Loren and I had this relationship that I can't remember. The hurt that flashed in her eyes at the mention of my memory killed me more. I really did hurt this girl. This girl that matters so much.

" I don't know if you will ever get your memories back, Eddie. I hope that you do. I can't imagine not remembering a portion of my life. I imagine that it sucks. "

That was the understatement of the century. " I hate it. I hate not knowing how my dad looked when he fell in love with your mom. I hate not remembering proposing to my girlfriend. " Hurt flashed again and I wanted to stab myself for even bringing that up. " I hate not remembering the day that you came into my life." Of all the things that I can't remember that is the one thing that hurts me the most. This amazing girl was my friend, my more than friend, and I can't remember a single second of the time we spent together. It isn't fair. "Tell me about us. "

She left out a breath. A frustrated breath. " I already did. " She pulled her hand away from my face and went to stand up but I was quick and grabbed her arm before she could to stop her. She looked at me with pleading in her eyes, " Eddie, we have a house full of people."

" They can wait. Right now the only thing I care about it knowing about us. I want to know all of it. " I relaxed my hold on her arm when she settled more comfortable in her chair. " Kissing you proved to me that there is more just like I thought. "

" What do you mean?"

" You stir feelings in me. I don't believe for a second that you were just some rebound chick that I used to get over my pain when Chloe and I broke up. I am not that kind of guy even if I am hurt. You and I had something that was real. I know that we did. I felt it when we kissed. "

I expected her to lie to me again, because it seemed to be her go to response but for the second time she surprised me. " I thought that what we had a real. It was on my end. "

I had no idea what that meant. " You are going to have to explain that to me. "

She took a deep breath and looked out into the night behind my head. " You weren't ready for another relationship. I knew that but I didn't stop things from happening between us. "

" What do you mean by things? " I refused to believe that I had sex with this girl and didn't remember it. That would be worse than anything else. Sex isn't something that I take lightly.

She half smiled, " I don't mean what you think I mean. You were never anything but a perfect gentleman to me. "

Well there was that at least, I guess. Too bad I can't remember being on my best behavior. " So then what did you mean?"

" Just that I took our relationship more seriously than you did. I was a high school girl who was hanging out with my celebrity crush. I let myself believe that we had more than we actually did. " She seemed saddened but I couldn't tell if it was because of the fact that she believe she felt more for me than I did for her or if because she was admitting to it. Either way it hurt my heart. I didn't like to cause unnecessary pain to anyone let alone someone who obviously cared so much about me. " Nothing that happened was your fault, Eddie. "

She was trying to make it okay for me. But it wasn't and nothing that she said would make it that way. I hurt her, whether I intended to or not, I did and I loathed myself for it. " Don't use kid gloves with me Loren. Tell me what I did to you. "

She shook her head, " you didn't do anything. I swear to you. You were amazing to me. You taught me so much and gave me so much faith in myself. " Her voice started to shaky and I could see the tears forming in her eyes. " If I had never met you I wouldn't be as happy with my life as I am today. I would be off at law school always wondering what if. "

I touched her face again because I wanted to and because I felt like this was too intimate a moment not to be touching her. I needed to feel her skin against my hand. " Loren you deserve all the good things that have happened to you. You deserve nothing but good things. I am sorry that I can't remember you." Drawing her towards me once again, I brushed my lips across hers and smiled when she didn't pull back. It was a much simplier kiss than the first one but it packed the same kind of punch. She still stirred something deep inside of me that was screaming to come out. Pulling back, I pushed her hair behind her ear, " I want you to do something for me, okay?" She looked a little nervous but nodded anyway. " I want you to promise me , right here right now, that you won't run from me anymore."

She met my eyes, " I promise. No more running. " I believe her. How could I not with the way she was looking at me. Her brown eyes told me that I could trust in her. And I would until she gave me a reason not to. I wasn't happy about the lying thing but obviously she did it because she thought it was for the best and she was trying to protect me, or maybe even herself. As mad as I am that people have been lying to me since I woke up,I could understand. I was confused enough and added information in that wouldn't change things wouldn't have done anything but make it worse.

On the other hand, knowing about my apparent relationship with Loren could have resulted in her and I have a conversation a long time ago and maybe we would be in a different place right now. A better place. But right now I need to focus on the fact that I was slowly chipping away at the way that was between Loren and I. My plan is to have it completely demolished sooner rather than later.

"So we really do need to get back inside, " She said somewhat relunctantly. She was right and we both knew that our seperate time together was over. She stood up and moved to push in her chair.

"Wait a minute, " I told her before she could pass by me and open the door that would lead us back inside to our guests. " Did you love me? Before the accident?"

She closed her eyes and I could see her chest rising as she took a big gush of air into her body. I guess the question of whether or not she was going to continue running from me was about to be answered. If she deflected then she would be breaking her promise. " Yes." She looked me straight in the eye and answered with complete sincerity. Probably the most sincerity I have ever seen from anyone in my life. " Yes I loved you. "


	11. Chapter 7 Part 1

**A/N: Alright everyone, here is the next chapter. It is super short and kinda boring but really its just a filler chapter to set up for the next one which will have a whole heck of a lot of drama in it. It seems like some of you are getting frustrated with Eddie's amnesia judging by the im's and reviews I am getting so I will tell you that in the next update, he will remember something about his previous life during the time he was with Loren. Also someone commented in a private message that they are upset that Eddie chucked his plan to spend more time with Loren...no worries...he hasn't. He just got sidelined. The plan will be making a come back :) And the case of Cameron's loose lips is well...here you go :) When I said loose lips, I didn't necesarrily mean that he would be spilling the beans about anything :) You will see what I meant at the end of this chapter. And yes this was necesary so put down whatever you were gonna use to hit me with :) Anyway, I hope that you will enjoy this even if it is short and doesn't have much happening...please continue to stick with this story. I promise it will be worth it :) **

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing and no one except my three kids :) **

By the time that Eddie and I walked back into the house, all hell had basically broken loose. Veronica was being held on one side of the room by Adam and Logan while Phil and Ian were holding tight to Chloe. Veronica was kicking and screaming to be let go while Chloe was using her long blond hair as a weapon to smack her captors in the face. They weren't letting go however. Adrianna and Mel were sitting calmly on the coffee table with a magazine between them. And Cameron looked like he was ready to bolt for the door.

"Um...what is going on?" I asked as I made my way further into the room and heard the whirl of Eddie's chair come to a stop behind me. I moved slightly to the side so that he could be next to me and see what I was seeing. Though I couldn't really believe what I was seeing.

"Oh you know, the usual. Too crazy blondes trying to rip each other's hair extenstions out. " Logan replied fastening his grip on Veronica's waist. "This one, " he gestered with his chin towards the top of Veronica's head, " is in bobcat mode, Loren. If we let her go, I guarentee that their will be stitches needed by the end of the night. "

Eddie shook his head as Chloe bellowed towards him, " She is crazy, Eddie. " She elbowed Ian in the stomach and when he reacted by letting go of his hold on her, Chloe was able to overpower him but not Phil who was quicker than her and reinforced his grip on her, " let go of me. "

" What the hell is going on? " Eddie demanded. The gentle sound of his voice from moments ago was gone and in its place was frustration and complete disbelief. This little scene had definitely killed the calm mood that was between him and I. Things were tense in this room now and we were both reminded of the present and the situations facing us. Eddie had to deal with Chloe and wherever thier relationship stood and I had to deal with Veronica and figure out if she and I could put our broken friendship back in order.

" She, " Adrianna began pointing at Chloe, " started running her mouth about you, " she pointed to me, " and so she, " the finger went to Veronica now, " told her to shut up or she would shut her up. " Adrianna looked back down at the magazine that was between herself and Mel, " and Chloe wouldn't shut up so here we are. "

Eddie shook his head again and all eyes seemed to lock on him as he glared Chloe's way. The anger that hadn't been there just a few minutes ago seemed to return to him and I could literally feel it radiating off of him. Ignoring our audience, I bent down next to him and placed my hand on his arm. " You need to calm down. You aren't going to do anyone any good if you are this angry, Eddie. "

And just like that the anger left his body and right before my eyes, he seemed to calm down. It may have boosted my self esteem to know that I could so easily talk him out of his anger issues. I wouldn't let it go to my head though, of course.

" I know that you and Chloe have a lot to talk about, but it can wait. We are not being very good hosts right now so what do you say we rectify that?" The tension in the room was thick but hopefully we would be able to get the peacefulness back because having all my friends here tonight was a big deal to me.

Eddie nodded his head to affirm my request and then moved closer to where the guys were holding Chloe. " Are you going to behave or do we need to ask you to leave?"

She rolled her eyes, but smiled seductively at her boyfriend. It made me want to vomit and judging from the looks on Veronica, Melissa and Adrianna's faces, they felt the same way. " I will be nice. " Chloe told Eddie.

The guys loosened thier grips on her. Well Phil did. Ian kept a hand on her wrist and moved around so that he was facing her, " if you ever do that to me again, I will forget that you are a lady." He warned her to which she completely ignored and saddled over to sit on the arm of Eddie's wheelchair like nothing ever happened. She had guption, as my grandmother would say, that was for sure. Either that or she was in total denial that this whole thing was basically over. Eddie knew the truth. Well most of it.

Admitting that I had loved him was a major thing for me. I had wanted to run from that particular truth but I couldn't after just promising him that I wouldn't run anymore. The question had been unexpected but when he asked me if I loved him, I had to be honest. Well, mostly honest anyway. The fact that I still love him didn't seem relivent right now. He had enough to deal with and adding my never ending feelings to that wouldn't do anything but make things harder for him.

Depite the kisses we shared outside on the back patio, Eddie and I were going to be friends. I would stand beside him and help him through whatever he needs me to help him through, but I would not under any circumstance, complicate his life by letting my feelings out and trying to restart our relationship. Now was not the time for that when he was dealing with Chloe, his injuries and his memory loss.

While Eddie was trying to pretend that the close proximity of Chloe wasn't making him crazy, I moved to where Adam and Logan were holding Veronica. " Are you okay?"

"As soon as these two let me go so that I can beat the hell out of barbie over there, I will be just fine." She struggled against the guys but Logan just chuckled and pulled her closer to him. He was obviously having more fun with this than he should be.

"Settle down, bobcat."

"Seriously Echolls, stop calling me that. Or I will make it impossible for you to ever procreate." Veronica warned him and he immediately snapped his lips together knowing damn well that Veronica would make good on that promise.

" I guess I should thank you for defending me. " I told her when her blue eyes met mine. "You didn't have to do that."

"Yes I did. She was being a catty little bitch, Loren. Chloe doesn't think that she did anything wrong during this whole charade. " Veronica glared towards the other blonde and raised her voice, " but she took complete advantage of everything and tried to make herself look good in Eddie's eyes. "

I stepped directly in front of Veronica to block her view of Chloe and forced her eyes back to me. " Look, V, I appreciate that you are being such a good friend, especially when you are mad at me , but really it's fine. " I lowered my voice so that only she could hear me, " Eddie and I are good right now and he is planning to end it with Chloe so she won't be around much longer." In a perfect world anyway. But I never better. Chloe would leech onto Eddie even after the breakup just like the last time.

Veronica smiled , " does that mean that you and Eddie are..." She raised her eyebrows sugestively and I felt my face flash at Logan's roar of laughter.

I immediately started shaking my head. " No, no. We are just going to be friends but we had a really good talk. " Mel walked up and stood beside me as I was explaining. " I promised to stop running away from him. He will deal with Chloe tomorrow. Right now, though, we would really like to continue hanging out with our friends. So can you just let whatever Chloe did and said roll off you for right now? "

Of course she agreed right away that she would behave and deal with Chloe at a later time. I had no doubt that Veronica and Chloe would have a show down because Veronica wasn't the type to just let something go indefinitely. But for now, for tonight, she was letting it go. It was because of me, I knew, and I appreciated it more than I could even tell her especially because of the fact that I had gone behind her back and invited Logan here tonight. That had worked out favorably between the two of them but I had still hurt V by scheming and she would no doubt tell me exactly how that made her feel at a later time. But now, tonight, everything would be put aside. Starting now.

Melissa clapped her hands together, " ok so our first game didn't work out so well but how about we try another one. "

A collective groan seemed to echo through the room. To say the last game that we played as a group didn't go so well was a major understatement. And I for one wasn't looking forward to a repeat. Then again...things seemed to be okay between Logan and Veronica. Plus after our talk outside, I felt better around Eddie so maybe this wouldn't be so bad. " What did you have in mind, Mel?"

" Three truths and a dare!" My best friend announced with a little gleam in her eyes that I knew meant trouble. And this game, at least all the times that Mel, Phil and I had played it when we were younger, meant trouble. Cameron and Adrianna no doubt knew the game as well since it seems to be a favorite at all the parties in the Valley.

" I don't know that game. " Veronica, Logan, Ian and Eddie said at the same time. Chloe added in that she didn't know either.

Cameron moved closer to the group and away from the door. He no longer had the look of wanting to flee in his eyes. He stood next to me but focused on the side of the room where most of the newcomers to the game seemed to be. " I don't think it was a right of passage. I think it started out as a Valley kid party game thats how we all know what it is. " He explained which got him an eye roll from Eddie. For some reason Eddie didn't seem to particularly like Cameron. I couldn't help but wonder why especially because the first time I introduced them, Eddie seemed to like him just fine. Of course he doesn't exactly remember that.

Mel nodded, " Yeah I actually made it up and it kind of spun from there. Basically its a spin on spin the bottle and truth or dare. " She pushed the coffee table back so that it was up against the sofa and there was a larger area in the livingroom. " Basically we all sit around in a circle. and one of us will spin the bottle whoever the bottle lands on as to answer the spinner's question truthfully...then that person gets to be the spiner and so on until we get to the forth person...then they have to do a dare rather than a truth. "

Though the way that she explained it was rather confusing, everyone seemed to understand the concept of the game and were interested in playing it. i grabbed the empty bottle of wine from the dinner table for us to use as the spinning device. Everyone gathered around in a circle. Chloe was beside Eddie, of course, on one side and Ian was on the other. I sat between Ian and Mel with Adam on the other side of her. Veronica was between Adam and Logan and then Adrianna and Phil with Cameron closing out the circle. We were an odd group of friends, considering all that has happened, but we were friends nonetheless. Well, most of us anyway. I couldn't help but look at Chloe as she remained perched on the side of Eddie's wheelchair. He couldn't get down on the floor with the rest of us, but she could and was choosing instead to remain glued to his side. I shook my head but reminded quiet and I settled myself into my spot. " Mel, you should spin first since this was your idea. "

Mel grabbed the bottle from my outstretched hand and made her way to the center of the circle we all formed with our bodies. She blew on the opening of the bottle, seemingly for luck before laying it on the carpet and giving it a good spin. After a couple of complete circles the opening end of the bottle landed on Phil. " Oh goody. " Mel's smile was huge and I knew instantly that Phil was about to be put on the spot. " Ok, brother dear. Remember that you must answer this honestly. "

" Yeah, yeah, get on with it , Mel."

" Okay, how do you really feel about being a dad?"

Phil glared at Mel and looked to his pregnant wife who was waiting expectantly for his answer. I thought for sure that he would say whatever he could to keep himself from getting into trouble with Ade, but he surprised me when he took a deep breath and said, " I am scared out of my mind. I have no idea what to do or how to handle any kind of situation with a baby."

Adrianna didn't seem to be as bother by Phil's declarition as I thought she would be. She reached out and grabbed her husband's hand. " I am scared too. I am so glad that you said it first though. "

Seeing the two of them sitting there admitting that they were scared and being totally honest with one another proved to me just how much they have changed over these last months. The old Phil never would have admitted such a thing and if he had, Adrianna would have blown a gasket. Pride for my friends washed over me. Pride for myself as well because I had taken a chance on becoming friends with these two after everything that happened and not only had they not let me down, but I felt super close to the both of them. " I think it's pretty normal to be nervous when you are about to become parents. Especially because you are so young. " I told them.

Veronica nodded her agreement. " But trust me, just from the little I know about you guys, you will be great parents. "

Adrianna bit her lip, a sign that I have come to know meant that she was unsure. " But what if we mess her up?"

I used my knees to move myself so that I was sitting in front of Adrianna. Mel did the same. " Adrianna, you will both be fine. As long as you love her and protect her, she will be happy."

" And I can say a lot of things about my brother slash cousin that aren't so great, but when he loves he loves deeply so I know that his little girl will be the most loved person in this whole wide world. "

" I agree. " I told her and sent a smile to Phil, " plus she will have me and Mel as the best aunties in the universe. That little peanut is never going to want for anything materialistically, physically, or emotionally. "

Adrianna smiled and pulled us into a hug. "Thank you so much. You don't know what it means to me that this baby is going to have so many great people in her life. I don't want to make the same mistakes my mom made."

Pulling back from the hug, I squeezed her hand. " Its gonna be fine, Aid. You will see. One good thing about having a parent split on us is that we know what not to do when it comes to our own children. You will be a better mom than your mom ever could be. "

With tears in her eyes, Adrianna hugged me again. " Thank you Loren."

" You welcome. " Turning to Phil, I smiled at him. " You are going to be a great dad. Not only do you have Gus for a role model but you have always been a good brother to Mel. " Mel snorted and I rolled my eyes, " Ok, most of the time. And even when we were kids and you were a jerk to me, you were kind of like a big brother to me too. You have grown up so much in the last couple of months. I am proud of you Phil." I gave him a hug too along with a big squeeze before pulling back and giving him a big smile.

He gave me the most charming smile and it reminded me of the time when I had a secret crush on him. It was a long long time ago, but the memory was nice. " Thanks, Lo. That means a lot. "

I moved back to my orginal spot and made the mistake of meeting Eddie's eyes. He looked like he was angry with me. That couldn't be right though because I didn't do anything wrong. He moved his line of vision toward Phil and suddenly it made sense. Eddie is jealous. Why the heck would he be jealous of Phil? Shaking it off, I waited for Mel to move from the center of the circle. Phil took her spot and spun the bottle. It landed on Adam. " Ha. " Phil rubbed his hands together trying to be intimidating but all he got in response was a pillow thrown at him by Mel.

" Just ask the question doofus."

" Alright geez. Adam, tell us the truth, doesn't Melissa drive you absolutely stark raving crazy?"

Another pillow from my mothers couch hit Phil in the face. He just laughed at is fell it his lap.

Adam laughed but only quickly, " No actually I love her just the way that she is. She never gets on my nerves or drives me crazy."

It was a sweet statement and every girl in the room, surprising including Chloe, responded in a chorus of "awwww". Adam blushed and Mel leaned over and kissed him on the cheek. They were completely adorable and I was completely jealous that they could be together with no interuptions, distractions, hurt feelings or lost memories. Of course as soon as that thought entered my mind I felt guilty. Melissa was my best friend and her happiness was important to me so feeling jealous of it made me feel like the worst friend on the planet. She and Adam deserved everything and I wouldn't let my own issues cloud my feelings about that. " Alright lover boy, get up there." I told him with a smile.

Phil sat back down and Adam took his spot in the middle of the room. Maybe it wasn't fair of me to cast an expectation but Adam was too nice of a guy for this truth to be anything juicy so I didn't feel awkward or tense when he spun the bottle and it landed on Chloe. That is until I saw Mel lean up and whisper in her boyfriend's ear. I prayed to God that Adam wouldn't be crazy enough to ask whatever Mel told him to. Unfornately, he was that crazy. " Okay, Chloe. Inquiring minds what to know if you still talk to Tyler Roarke. "

And just like that the tension was back in the room and Chloe was on the spot as everyone, including Eddie looked at her. She glared at Adam but to his credit he remained cool and collected and never let his eyes waver.

" Remember that you have to tell the truth. " Melissa taunted. Though we all knew that even if Chloe did lie, we wouldn't be able to prove it. None of us ever talked to Tyler.

"Answer the question, Chloe. " Eddie demanded with a firm edge to his voice. He wasn't looking at her though. He was looking at some random spot on my livingroom wall. I wanted to reach out and touch him again because I could tell by the tension in his body that he was trying so hard to fight off the bad feelings that were consuming him. But after his reaction to my hug with Phil, I wasn't sure that it would help for a second time. I wish I could understand what that was all about. He had no reason to be jealous of Phil or anyone else. I couldn't tell him that though. He believed, as I wanted him to, that my feelings for him were in the past. It was best that way. He knew the things that he needed to know. Everything else would just completely complicate the situation. Especially for Eddie.

Chloe blew out a frustrated breath, " Fine. Yes I talk to Tyler. He and I are friends. "

I shook my head for once wishing that she was stupid enough to lie. That was not a good answer.

" Friends? " Eddie looked at her now. " Is that what you call it, Chloe? "

" We have always been friends. Things just went too far. I don't know what else to say to you about that."

" Nothing. " Eddie said firmly. "There is nothing left to say about it." He nodded his head towards Adam. " Its your turn now. "

Adam reclaimed his orginal seat and Chloe took center stage so to speak. She glared right at me and I felt like she was setting me up for something completely insane right in that moment. I literally felt a chill go down my spine at the way that she was looking at me. She picked up the bottle and gave it a good spin. I was relieved when it landed on Cameron and not me. I could only imagine what kind of dare Chloe Carter would come up with for me. She barely knew Cameron so I felt like him having to take Chloe's dare was relatively safe.

Of course once again I was wrong. Still looking at me, Chloe gave Cameron his dare. "Cameron, I dare you to kiss your high school crush. "

Oh my god. This was not happening right now. But the astonished gasps that escaped Mel, Adam , Phil and Adrianna's mouths told me that it was completely real. Veronica, Logan, Ian and Eddie were oblivious since they didn't go to school with us, but judging from the look on Chloe's face, she knew exactly what she was doing.

Cameron didn't seem to mind what was happening though because he calmly stood up and made his way towards me. There was absolutely nothing that I could do to stop this from happening. But even as he kneeled down in front of me and inched his way into my personal space I knew that I was trapped just the way that Chloe wanted me to be. It didn't help that right before Cameron took my lips with his, I cast my eyes in Eddie's direction. The mixture of shock, confusion, anger and hurt that I saw there would never ever leave my mind.


	12. Chapter 7 Part 2

_**A/N: Okay so this chapter will probably bring about a whole lot of emotions for you guys...so let me just say that this is all part of my plan. Leddie is the final destistation so remember that before you feel the end to send me nasty personal messages. I get way too many of those after each update and its becoming annoying. I understand that you want a happily ever after for Leddie, I do too. But if I just put them together, it wouldn't be a good story. Every good love story has twists and turns and bumps along the way. I love that you guys are so pasionate about this story but some of the PMs are mean and they do hurt my feelings. I love reviews and I love to hear your thoughts on the story but please refrain for the name calling...its really not necesary. The reviews, favorites ,and follows really do make it so much more inspiring to right this story so please keep it up. **_

_**Special shout out to Marirosa for helping me out with a certain scene in this update. I would be lost without you :) Thank you so much :) **_

_**As always, the only thing I own is the plot line...everything else belongs to the mean people who won't give us a season 2 :( **_

_**Oh and one last thing...I didn't proof this. I meant to but I got busy and then I thought about waiting til tomorrow to post but I knew that people would come after me with pitch forks so here it is un-proofed so please forgive any and all mistakes. **_

_**Enjoy, review :) **_

_**EDDIE POV**_

Ten minutes after the fact and I still couldn't get the image of that jerk's lips on Loren's out of my mind. Even when I reminded myself that Loren didn't engage in the kiss, I couldn't stop the anger from bubbling up inside of me. Loren pulled back from the kiss after about two seconds but in my opinion it was two seconds too long. She never should have let that creep's lips anywhere near hers. I was doing my best not to meet her eyes but I could tell that she was looking at me, judging my reaction.

I don't know what exactly Loren Tate expected from me. I had no clue what my place with her was supposed to be. It was obvious that our earlier conversation outside made her feel better, but it hadn't me. The fact that she used the past tense in regards to her feelings for me made me feel worse than ever. Maybe it was selfish , or self-destructive, but I wanted her to still love me. I wanted for her to want a future with me. Because, being completely honest, I wanted a future with her.

I was a jerk. Plain and simple. What else could I be for wanting to be with someone other than my girlfriend? Of course my girlfriend was a liar and cheater, but it still didn't change the fact that I shouldn't be wanting a relationship with someone else when I am still officially in a relationship with her. Casting my eyes in Chloe's direction, across the room in a heated discussion with Adrianna, it me that I wasn't nearly as hurt by the fact that she cheated on me with that punk Tyler as I probably should be. I am mad as hell that she made me look like a full but wasn't broken hearted over it. So between the longing for Loren and the fact that I was mad rather than hurt about Chloe's cheating it was obvious that whatever I once felt for the blonde was gone. Now all I had to do was end it officially. I wasn't looking forward to that part. There was no doubt in my mind that Chloe would have a fit.

"Eddie."

While I was focused on Chloe, Loren had come up to me. He looked over at her as she stood next to my chair. " What." I didn't mean to be so short with her but that kiss between her and Cameron throw me off course.

"What's wrong?" She bent down so that she was more comfortably at my level.

I hate that people have to bend down to talk to me. They have to make themselves more uncomfortable in order to have a face to face conversation with me. Annoyance joined my anger as it bubbled around inside of me. " Nothing. What could possibly be wrong?"

She pushed her hair behind her ears, " Why are you being like this with me. I though that we were good now."

Of course she did. Because she didn't understand that every time she is near me, everytime I smell the vanilla scent of her perfume, I want to pull her even closer and ravage her with my lips. She didn't understand that I needed to touch her, even just if it was her hand, in order to feel some sort of peace with all these emotions circling around inside of me. She couldn't understand that all I wanted right now, in this moment, was for her and I to be more than just friends. But she wouldn't ever know those things because she said it herself. She loved me. Past tense. She was over me and whatever heartbreak I had caused her. I wouldn't be the jerk who refused to let her move on. How could I be when I couldn't even remember anything about the time we spent together? It wouldn't be fair. And though everything in me wanted to be selfish and beg her to give us a chance, I wouldn't because it wasn't fair. "We are good. "

"Then why won't you look at me."

Busted. I had taken a page from her book and found a spot on the wall to concentrate on so that I wouldn't have to meet her chocolate colored orbs. Now though, I had no choice. I let my eyes look with hers and the hurt I saw there was like a punch to the gut. God, why couldn't I stop hurting this girl. " I'm looking at you."

"But you are angry. I can tell because your fists are clenthched so tight they are turning purple. " She reached over and pried my fingers from where the nails were biting into the skin on my palms. We both looked at the impressions that my fingernails left in my skin. It looked painful but I couldn't feel it. She used her finger to slowly massage the indentations . "Better?"

I nodded because the thickness in my throat wouldn't allow me to speak just yet. I wish I could put into words what the girl, this amazing girl did to me. The things that she made me feel were foreign to me yet I welcomed them because they were new and exciting and made something deep inside of me come alive.

"Are you mad at me?" The worry in her voice was evident enough to make me meet her eyes with a frown.

" No. Why would I be mad at you, Loren?"

She bit the corner of her lip and I had to snap my lips together so that I wouldn't drool. Her action was crazy sexy. Even if she didn't mean it to be and if this wasn't the time or place. "Because Cameron kissed me. Because Phil hugged me. "

So maybe I was easier to read than I liked to think. Or maybe she just knew me too well. "Why would I be mad at you because they put thier dirty paws and lips on you. " She shrugged her shoulders and I let out a sigh. " I am not mad at you Loren. But I am jealous."

"Seriously?" She arched her eyebrows and gave me a look that said I must be crazy.

I nodded. " I don't like them touching you. " I couldn't believe that it popped out of my mouth like that but there it was in the middle of us now. I couldn't and wouldn't take it back because it was the truth and at this point I didn't feel like it would cause much more tension.

She smiled sweetly and that stirring in my belly become active once again. " It was a dare Eddie. Nothing more. And Phil and I have known each other practically our whole lives."

She was right, I knew that , but I still hadn't liked that they both had thier hands on her. I wanted to be the only one allowed to have that privilge. I leaned my head closer to her and whispered my next words because despite the fact that most of our friends were conversing in thier own little groups, I didn't want to be overheard. " I want to be the only guy touching you."

She definitely wasn't expecting that if the way her eyes dialted was any indication. I would never get tired of surprising her. She always had the reactions that not only made my self esteem excel but made me even more convinced that whatever I felt for this girl in my past was well deserved on her part. " You can't say stuff like that to me, Eddie."

" Why not , _Loren_" I gave her a sexy little smirk as I accenuated her name. Flirting with her was probably the most fun I have had in a good little while. Especially when her cheeks turned three different shades of red like they were doing right now. It was indescribably adorable.

Her eyes moved to the blonde that I had yet to deal with. " Because you still have a girlfriend and you aren't that guy who flirts with another girl while he has girlfriend. " She moved her hand away from mine and stood up. " I need to go talk to Mel. I will talk to you later?"

I nodded once and instead of watching her walk away, I turned my eyes back on Chloe who was still talking to Adrianna on the other side of the room. If I had to guess I was say rather than talking she was scolding the younger, very pregnant girl. Obviously for letting the perverbial cat out of the bag about the text spoof thing. Of course Chloe wouldn't take responsibility for her own actions. " Chloe." I said loud enough to make everyone stop thier own various conversations. She turned towards me and gave me a big smile. I had to fight the urge to roll my eyes at how quickly she could turn off and on her personalities. The fact that I couldn't see the real Chloe Carter sooner really grated on my nerves. " You and I need to talk. Meet me in my room."

_**XXXXXXXXXXXXXX**_

" So what are you saying exactly, Eddie? " Right on cue, the tears started falling from Chloe's eyes. She came into my room less than five minutes ago thinking that I wanted to cuddle or make out but when she leaned in to kiss me and I backed my chair up, she realized that I wasn't in the mood for either. I was straight with her and blurted out that we couldn't keep pretending and now she was playing the martyr. Right on cue.

"I am saying that you and I haven't been happy for a very long time. "

She started vigoriously shaking her head back and forth, " thats not true. I am happy, Eddie. I love you."

" So much so that you jumped into bed with Tyler Roarke." The anger was back in my voice. Not because I was hurt but because she lied to me and played me for a fool for God knows how long.

Sitting down on the edge of my bed, she let out a puff of annoyance. " I already explained that to you. We already worked past this."

No she worked passed this with the old Eddie. The Eddie that I can't remember being right now. He seemed to be a far guy from the angry, bitter person that I was today. " This is not just about Tyler or all the lies you have told me. This is about the fact that my feelings for you have changed. " Hurting her, making her feel bad wasn't my objective here. I just wanted to make her understand that we were no longer going to be in a relationship. " I am not comfortable being your boyfriend right now."

" This is about Loren Tate, isn't it. " She angrily wiped away her tears and stood back up. " I knew that when she came back here she would ruin everything. Just like she did before."

It was me shaking my head this time. It wasn't about Loren. Partly, a tiny little part, was because of my feelings for Loren , but largely this was due to the fact that I didn't trust Chloe anymore. I couldn't count on the fact that she was telling me the truth about anything. Ending the relationship was best for a lot of reasons , actually. Including the fact that kissing Chloe, holding her hand, just generally spending time with her, didn't excite me the way that it should. " This has nothing to do with Loren. It has to do with the way that I feel about you. About us."

" How do you feel?"

This was the part that was going to hurt her. I didn't want that but I had to be honest. " Do you remember a couple of weeks back when you went away on that modeling job and forgot your phone?" At her nod, I continued. " You and I didn't talk once in the whole time you were gone. That should have bothered me. I should have missed you. But the truth is , Chloe that I didn't."

The hurt that ebbed into her eyes was instantous. It was something I hadn't wanted to do but she wouldn't leave me any other choice. Chloe wasn't one to take no for an answer. Recent behavior also showed me that she was looking to blame Loren for anything and everything that she could. So it had to be crystal clear to her that I am not breaking up with her to be with Loren. I am doing it because its overdue and its time for both of us to cut our losses and move on. "Wow."

She didn't deserve to be hurt but she also didn't deserve for me to keep pretending that things were good between us when they haven't been for a long time. " I'm sorry. I just can't keep pretending like things are the same as they always have been when they aren't." I moved my chair closer to where she was standing so that i could take her hand. She let me. " I will always care about you, Chloe. I just don't love you anymore."

The tears were back. I hated making girls cry. It made me feel like the scum of the earth.

" I am not trying to be a jerk, Chloe. I just want to be honest with you. I am not happy with you anymore."

" But...but you said you love me. " She said as she laced our fingers together.

She just wasn't going to make this easy at all. " I do love you , Chloe. A part of me will always love you. But I am not in love with you. In all honestly, I don't even know if I know what it means to be in love anymore. I just know that when I think about my future, you aren't in it. "

Harsh, yes. But it was necessary. She pulled her hand away from mine and took a couple of steps back towards the door. " I can't believe you are doing this to me. "

"I am not doing it to you Chloe. I am doing it for you. "

She narrowed her blue eyes at me. " That doesn't make any sense."

" Yes it does. I am saving you from being in a relationship with someone who doesn't want to be in it. From someone who will just continue to go through the motions because it is what is expected not because he wants to hold your hand or kiss you. "

" How long have you just been going through the motions as you call it?"

This part was gonna hurt. To admit it was admitting that I was a bigger jerk than anyone thought and to hear it would likely break her heart. " Since I woke up from the coma. " Her face paled but I had to get it all out. I had to let her know the truth. " What they say about being in a coma hearing what you are saying is the truth. Well kind of any way. I heard everything that was said that day. I can't remember anything for the rest of the time I was unconscious. " I can remember my Pop begging me to wake up and telling me that so many people were missing me. I can remember Chloe telling me that she loved me and couldn't wait for me to wake up so we could finish planning our wedding. And I can remember the sounds of Loren crying as she sat by my bedside. Shaking off the thoughts of Loren before they could consume me, I concentrated on Chloe and what had to be done. " I heard you talking about how much you loved me and missed me. How we had so much to do before we got married. "

" You have been pretending all this time?" Her words were angry. I couldn't blame her though. I was a jerk. But then again..she wasn't completely innocent either. But we were beyond that now.

" I have. I didn't want to hurt you."

" You are hurting me now."

That much was clear, but I couldn't help it. " I really am sorry, Chloe. "

She ignored my apology and held up her hand. Her left, hand where the sparkling diamond mocked me. " Did you love me when you gave me this?"

" I don't know. " It was the truth. " I don't remember the proposal , Chloe. You know that."

She nodded, " Yes I do. I also know that you did love me before the accident. You were going to marry me. If you would just give me the chance, I can make you love me again."

Make me love her? She really just wasn't understanding this at all. " Chloe, you can't make someone love you. They either do or they don't. I don't. I'm sorry."

She didn't say anything for a couple of minutes and my words hung in the air between us. It was tense and uncomfortable but despite that I knew that I did the right thing. We couldn't go on like this anymore. Even before today, before I found out about Tyler and all the stuff with Loren, I was planning to end things. It was the right thing to do. Sooner or later, Chloe would see that. I hope.

Finally deciding that the silence had stretched out long enough, Chloe cleared her throat. " So I guess there is nothing else to say. Well except that you will be sorry Eddie. No one will ever love you like I do." And with that in typical Chloe fashion, she opened the door to my bedroom and stalked out.

I should probably feel bad. Maybe cry a little bit or something. Instead all I felt was relieved. It was done and over with. Using my arm controls, I moved towards the far side of the room where my favorite musical intrument sat. It had been weeks since I picked it up. It was a gift from my father. One I didn't remember even recieving as he gave it to me on my birthday. A day I couldn't remember. I didn't even bother to pick it up. It wouldn't do any good anyway. Music wasn't coming as easily as it used to. I would piddle around with it until I got frustrated and then I would set it back down and not even look at it for weeks. It was always the same. More than anything right now I wanted to just take a drive.

Just as the thought about taking a drive entered my mind a crushing pain did as well. I closed my eyes and my hands feel up to grasp my head as a flash of memory bombarded me.

_"How about that birthday dinner, huh?"_ My dad's voice was slightly amused, slightly annoyed as he said the words. We were in his place. Well his old place, above the club. I couldn't make out much about our surroundings other than that but the conversation was ringing in my ears.

_"Yeah"_

_"Sorry it all kinda fell apart at the end."_

_"Nah, didn't fall apart. It ended nicely." _

_"What? What did I miss?" _

_"Nothing. Loren and I ended up going for a drive."_

_"A drive?"_

_"YES"_

_"Come on, you've got to stay professional with this girl."_

_"I am. We are."_

_"So you were out at this hour talking about business?"_

_" I can't help it. I'm falling for her."_

Just as quickly as the pain and the memory came, they disappeared. I wanted the memory back. I wanted to remember everything about that night. Not just the conversation with my dad, I wanted the dinner and the drive, all of it. And I didn't just want to remember the conversation. I wanted the whole entire memory to present itself to me. I wanted to see what I was wearing, where I was sitting, what I was eating. All of it. Every part. But as hard as I tried, it wouldn't come back. It was gone.

_**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXlal alalaXXXXX**_

_**CHLOE'S POV**_

Eddie would be sorry. He would realize that I am the best thing that has ever happened to him and he will come crawling back to me on his hands and knees. I will make him beg of course, but its what he deserves. But I will take him back because I love him and I need him.

I slammed his bedroom door as I left him alone and made my way down the hallways towards the livingroom. All the little teenagers were sitting around the tv engrossed in a movie. All except Loren of course. The little twit had her eyes glued to the hallway and saw me the minute that I came back into the room. There was no way for me to hide the fact that I had been crying. I am sure that the evidence was all over my face which meant that she knew exactly what was going on in that room. She knew that Eddie was ending things with me and just like before she would be more than happy to take my place in his life.

No way was that going to happen. It was time for me to let little Miss Perfect in on a couple of things. I was about to blow her little fantasy world apart. " Loren, can I talk to you for a minute?"

She nodded and stood up. I grabbed my purse off the hook just inside the front door. " You can walk me out. I am leaving. "

She simply nodded and followed me out being sure to close the door behind herself when we stepped outside. " What do you want to talk about?"

" I am sure you already know that Eddie just broke up with me." She started to say something to me, but I held my hand up to stop her. I really didn't want to hear anything the little princess had to say. " I am not going to fight him on it. But there is something that you should know. " I didn't give her a chance to ask me what it was. I pulled my purse off my shoulder and pulled out a little white stick. I held it up so that she could see the top of it. Just like I expected , her face turned whiter than normal.

"Is that what I think it is?"

I nodded, " yes. Loren, I am pregnant. I am carrying Eddie's baby."


	13. Chapter 8

**Remember Me Chapter 8**

"Pregnant?" Even as I said the would ouloud my heart ached and a weight the sized of a boulder settled on the bottom of my stomach. Chloe Carter was pregnant with Eddie's child. How is that even possible?

She pulled the pregnancy test away and shoved it back into her purse. " Before you brought your interfering self back to town, Eddie and I were in love. We did things that couples in love do. Including make love. We concieved a child out of that love. "

Her words seriously made me want to lose my dinner. Eddie and Chloe were having a baby. The proof was in the purse. I knew enough about Eddie's condition to know that it was possible for him to be able to...well to do _that_. The fact that he did it with Chloe made my heart hurt. I wasn't even ready to deal with the fact that it was her who was going to give her his first child. I just couldn't deal with this right now, right here, and with her. I just needed to go. I turned to do just that but her words stopped me in my tracks.

" I will take this child away from Eddie if he gets with you." Her words were clipped and full of venom. " I will not only never tell him, but if you tell him, I will disappear so fast your head will spin and Eddie will NEVER get a chance to know his child."

I felt my knees buckle but fought to remain not only standing but also not let her see what this was doing to me. I could and would never allow her to keep a child away from Eddie. " So is this you blackmailing me? Stay away from Eddie or he losing his child? Am I understanding you right?"

She smiled, " thats exactly what I am doing. If you and Eddie get back together, I will keep this baby away from him. Plain and simple."

This was unbelievable. " So then are you going to tell him about the baby?"

Chloe shrugged her shoulders. " Eventually. Right now though, he doesn't need to know. I don't want Eddie to come back to me because of the baby. I want us to work our way back together. The only way that can happen is if you are out of the picture. And if you don't take yourself out of the picture, I will be on the first plane out of California with Eddie's baby and he will never see it. "

If I didn't already think that Chloe was the biggest bitch in the world, this conversation would give me that conclusion. I shouldn't be surprised that she would go this far to hold onto Eddie, but I really was. Just the thought that she would take Eddie's child from him proved to me that she didn't care about him at all. Any one that loved Eddie would never do that to him. " Why are you doing this?"

"Because I want Eddie and I know that he has this stupid little attraction to you. As long as you are sniffing around him, he will never be able to commit to me. And if he doesn't commit to me, he won't commit to this baby. " She placed her hand on her still flat stoamch, " Having a baby is the most intimate thing that a couple can share. It will bond Eddie and I for life. "

Yes. Yes, it would. For the rest of Eddie's life, whether he and Chloe were a couple or not, she would be pulling the strings. She would be making the decisions and it's obvious from this conversation that the second that he dares to disagree with him, Chloe is gonna take the kid and run. She would forever use her and Eddie's child to manipulate and control him. And I had no choice but to let her because I will never be the girl who stood in the way of Eddie and his child. " So what is it exactly that I am supposed to say to Eddie? He and I agreed to be friends. I can't just go back on my word. And have you forgotten that Max and my mom are practically married. Eddie and I are going to be a part of each other's lives one way or another. "

Now she crossed her arms over her chest, " Well then I guess you have to figure it out. And you better do it fast because I am not gonna wait around forever. As soon as I see that you are distanting yourself from Eddie, I will tell him about the baby and we can start planning our future. "

So she wasn't going to tell him now? That wasn't fair. Eddie had a right to now. " You need to tell him Chloe. He deserves to know."

" I will tell him. When I am good and ready. If you tell him, I am gone. Don't mess with me little girl. " With that she turned on her heels and stalked down my driveway. My hate for the woman was at an all time high. The fact that she could emotional blackmail me this way, play on my love for Eddie, make me nusueas. She didn't even blink.

I took a couple of more minutes to try to figure out what I was going to do. The choice itself was easy. I would never stand between Eddie and his child. It was going to be carrying out the choice that would be difficult. Eddie and I were in a good place. I finally felt like I could be around him and feel comfortable. Not now. Now I would have to pull away from him again. And I would have to start lying by omission again. I can't be the one to tell him about the baby because then Chloe would take off and Eddie would never get the chance to be it's father. My life really sucks sometimes.

Taking a couple of deep breaths, I opened the door and made my way back inside of my house. Everyone was still gathered around the tv as the movie was still playing. Eddie had joined in now and was sitting right beside the only empty piece of furniture...my favorite chair. This was going to be a nightmare. Worse than Eddie not remembering me. Ok, maybe not worse...but it was right up there with it at the top of my this isn't fair list.

Eddie looked over and smiled at me as I kicked off my shoes by the door and made my way towards the chair. I didn't met his eyes the entire time and as I sat down I made sure to put as much distance between the two of us a humanly possible given the fact that he was sitting right next to me. I hated to do this to him. To both of us. For awhile there after our time on the patio earlier, I let myself believe that maybe, just maybe, it wouldn't matter that Eddie couldn't remember me or the time we shared together. We could make new memories...we could start over. That was impossible now.

" You ok?" He whispered to me as he leaned over into my personal space. The smell of his cologne washed over me and I had to take another deep breath before I finally forced myself to meet his eyes.

Lying to him wasn't something I wanted to be good at, but just this once I needed to be. So I did what I have done best for the months since the accident. I pasted the fakest smile possible on my face and nodded my head, " yep I am fine." I quickly adverted my eyes back to the tv. Unfornately, I wasn't going to get off that easy. Eddie reached over and took my hand. My head screamed at me to pull away. Chloe would do what she threatened if I didn't keep my distance from Eddie. But my heart had other ideas. My heart screamed at me that for the first time in months, Eddie and I were close again. We had the potential to get back what I have been missing for so long. I wanted this. I wanted him. I wanted us. So I didn't pull my hand away. I sat there, stiff as a board with my eyes glued to the tv and let him hold my hand. It was the one small thing that I needed right now. Before I broke my own heart all over again.

The movie ended after about another half an hour. Eddie had held my hand the entire time. It was nice. No, it was better than nice. It was perfect. But as the credits started to roll, I pulled my hand away and stood up to turn the movie off. " So what now?"

Logan stood up and put his hands in the pocket of his jeans, " I actually need to get going. I have an early appointment. " He walked over to where I was standing near the tv. " I don't know how to thank you for getting me here tonight."

" The only way you need to thank me if by not screwing up again, Logan." He was getting his second, well technically his fifth, chance with Veronica and he would be a complete slime ball to ruin it.

He leaned over and kissed me on the check. " I promise. " And I believe him. Especially when he turned to Veronica and gave her the biggest, happiest, most geniune smile I have ever seen. " Hey bobcat, wanna walk me out?"

Veronica rolled her eyes and stood up. " You need to stop calling me that. Seriously. " She motioned towards the door. " I'll be back guys." Logan followed her after saying his goodbyes to everyone and getting Eddie's number so that the two old friends can hang out.

After Veronica and Logan walked out the front door, everyone was quiet for what seemed like forever until finally Mel couldn't stand it anymore. She stood up and looked in Eddie's direction. " So you finally dumped the blonde barbie wanna be?"

In that moment, probably for the first time since we have been friends, I wanted to slap Melissa silly. I couldn't do this right now. I couldn't listen to Eddie talk abotu how he broke up with Chloe and look at me with expectant eyes. Those eyes would be the death of me. I had to stick to my decision. Pulling back from Eddie and our friendship, or more, was the only way that he could be in his child's life. I didn't let myself look in his direction. Instead I focused on Ian. Ian who instantly knew that something was wrong and gave me a look telling me that we would be having a conversation later. Oh goodie. Just another person for me to lie to.

Eddie didn't seem put off by Mel's question as he chuckled. " Yes, I ended my relationship with Chloe. " I could feel his eyes on mine but I didn't dare look his way. If I did, my resolve would be gone. I had to think about what was best for him. And it wasn't me. It was his child. " We just weren't working. " He explained to the group of our friends who let out a collected sigh of joy.

I couldn't not smile at that. Everyone in this room, save Cameron who didn't really have access to the information, hated Chloe and the way that she had manipulated her way back into Eddie's life after the accident and my decision not to fill him in on our relationship. Mel probably had the best reaction as she walked over and threw her arms around Eddie and kissed him loudly on the cheek.

" I am so glad that you finally came to your senses. I thought we would have to give you another bump on the head to make you see that Chloe is not the right girl for you." Mel sat back down and through her arms around Adam. " I know these things Eddie. I was smart enough to snatch Adam up when I had the chance. "

My eyes were still on Ian when Mel was speaking and I noticed when his eyes swung to Mel and Adam and landed to where Mel's arms were laced around Adam's neck. Interesting. It seems that our Ian has a little crush. I can't help but wonder how long that has been the case. Mel and Ian spent some time together when Eddie was in his coma but only in the hospital waiting room and I was there most of that time. I doubted that Mel had any idea that Ian was crushing on her. She would be flattered of course, but she was in love with Adam. They were planning a future together so Ian's interest wouldn't matter. But it would make Mel's self confident sky rocket so I would definitely tell her my suspicions about Ian's feelings.

I was so lost in my thoughts about Ian and Mel that I didn't hear Eddie saying my name. When he said it again. I quickly looked away from Mel and Adam and over at Eddie. I made sure not to meet his eyes dead on though. " Sorry. What?"

He chuckled a little, " I asked if you were ok. You were kind of zoned out."

I nodded. " Yes, I am ok. I just have some stuff to take care of tomorrow and it's weighing on my mind now. " I hated lying, not that I techinically was because I do in fact have a ton to do tomorrow. That's not what I was thinking about though. Mel and Ian weren't all that were on my mind. Figuring out a way to avoid Eddie, especially with our parents out of town for a couple of days was going to be tricky. Looking around at my friends, I gave them a smile. " And I am exhausted. Would you guys hate me if I asked if we could call it a night?"

"Forever." Mel said as she stood up with Adam and everyone else followed their lead. " We get it Lo. This was fun though. Mostly." She pulled me into a big hug. After she pulled back, everyone else took turns hugging me and Eddie before they headed for the door. Ian hung back a little while Adrianna and Phil were chattering with Eddie and pulled me into the kitchen. " What?"

"Don't what me? What did Chloe want? "

I shrugged my shoulders and looked away, focusing on the table. " She was just doing what she does best. Blaming me for everything bad that happens in her life. She thinks that Eddie dumped her for me."

" He did."

I shrugged again. " Maybe not."

Eddie's best friend let out a sigh. Not your average sigh, no it was one full of knowing and frustration. " Loren, whatever you are thinking, just stop. Eddie wants to be with you. I say that as a fact , not an opinion. I am his best friend. I know these things. And as your friend, I know that you want to be with him too. This is your chance."

I pulled out the kitchen chair and sat down. " No, Ian. Eddie and I still can't be together."

We pulled out the chair next to me and sat down. " Why not? Chloe is out of the picture. I knwo he hasn't gotten his memory back, but Loren he doesn't need it. Eddie is already half in love with you again."

I closed my eyes and let myself take in Ian's words. They were everything that I have wanted, needed. Everything that I dreamed of. Eddie Duran loving me was all I have ever wanted, truly. And just like before, I was on the verge of it. I could reach out and almost touch it. But then in the blink of an eye, it all comes crashing down around me. The first time it was the accident and this time it's Chloe. Obviously Eddie and I are not meant to be. It was a harsh reality but one that I need to learn to live with. " There has been some new developments."

Ian narrowed his eyes at me. I could feel them practically burning a whole into me so I finally looked him straight on just in time for him to ask, " What is Chloe threatening you with?"

I shouldn't be surprised that Ian figured it out so quickly. He has been dealing with Chloe for longer than I have been after all. I looked behind me and found that Eddie was still in conversation with Ade and Phil so I lowered my voice and confided in Eddie's best friend. " She's pregnant."

To say that Ian was shocked would be an face turned about three different shades of white. " Are you sure?"

I nodded. " She pulled out the pregnancy test and everything. I can't beleive that this is happening." Ian's face wasn't regaining any of the coloring in it and it struck me that he was having a worse reaction to this news than I did. "Are you ok? "

He nodded and shook his head as if to shake off whatever was running through his mind. " I'm fine. Listen, don't talk to anyone else about this right now, especially Eddie. Give me a day or two. Something is not right about this."

I narrowed my eyes but nodded. I am not sure that Ian getting involved in this is a good idea. " Chloe said that if I told Eddie before she was ready, she would disappear and he would never see the baby."

His face took on so many emotions as the words left my mouth. The most evident one being anger. " She's using the baby to hold onto Eddie?"

I nodded again. " She said that if I tell Eddie about the pregnancy or if he and I are together, she's leaving town with the baby." Saying the words out loud made it seem so much more real. Chloe Carter is having Eddie's baby. It wasn't supposed to be like this. I was supposed to have his baby. We were supposed to live happily ever after. That's the way I always imagined it anyway. Too bad that my fantasizes weren't real life. Real life gave Eddie amnesia and a baby with another girl. Whether I wanted to or not, it was time for me to face reality.

Ian's face was contorted with anger and he began to clentch his fists. His reaction was extremely confusing to me. I understand that best friend code called for defensiveness when someone was messing with your friend but this reaction to Chloe's threats was way more than what a normal person would feel. At least I thought so. " Look, I'm gonna go see Chloe. I need to talk to her. Don't do or say anything. Enjoy tonight with Eddie ok. I am going to make this better for the two of you. Don't end your relationship with him yet. Can you make that promise to me?"

I nodded. I could and I would. Ian is Eddie's best friend and if anyone could help me figure all this out it would be him. And one last night with Eddie, before I had to cut him out of my life, wouldn't be the end of the world.

I watched Ian practically race out of the kitchen and out my front door without even saying goodbye to Eddie. It was odd, his behavior, but I couldn't worry about that right now. Right now I had to deal with Eddie and spending one last great night with him.

After Ian was gone, I walked over to Phil and Adrianna who were still deep in conversation with Eddie. I didn't catch the subject but whatever they were talking about had Eddie smiling and laughing so that made me beyond happy. "What's so funny?" I asked as I came to stand next to Eddie's wheelchair.

Adrianna rolled her eyes and pointed between the guys, " They are talking about some stupid video game. Apparently it's the best of the best and the most exciting thing in the world. " She turned to Phil. " Honey, I am exhausted. Can we go now please?"

Phil nodded, " yeah we can go. " He held up his fist and did the little bump thing with Eddie and he and Adrianna said thier goodbyes. I walked them to the door and looked out into the driveway to see Veronica and Logan leaning against his car deep in conversation. I couldn't help that satisifying smile that spread across my face at the sight. Logan and Veronica would be okay, hopefully better than ever. I left the door unlocked so that she could get back inside and turned to Eddie. " Well that was an interesting evening."

He chuckled. " It was indeed. I think that you and I need to give up the party planning business."

I sat down on the sofa and kicked my legs up onto the coffee table. I felt lazy all of a sudden. And super exhausted. I tried to tell myself that it had nothing to do with my internal instinct to avoid Eddie knowing what I know about Chloe, but it did. Despite ian's advice to enjoy my night with Eddie, everything that threatened to fall apart was at the fore front of my mind. Especially the need to be honest and tell Eddie about Chloe's condition. But I knew Eddie well enough to know that he would confront her and then she would make good on her threats to leave. I would not and couuld not be responsible for that.

So when Eddie wheeled his way closer to me and took my hand, I quickly extracted it back. " I think I am gonna head to bed. It's been a crazy long day and I am really tired. " I didn't wait for a response as I jumped up and practically ran through the hall to my room. Once inside, I closed the door and slide down against it finally letting all my tears fall.

_**IAN POV**_

I didn't bother to knocked when I reached Chloe's apartment. It's not like it's the first time I was ever there anyway. In fact, I spent more time there in the past month than at my own place anyway.

Chloe was sitting on the sofa reading a magazine when I barged in. She looked up and gave me that million watt smile of hers. It wasn't as charming tonight as it has been in the past. " I didn't expect you to come by tonight." She stood up and made her way to me ready to wrap her arms around my neck but I stepped back. " What's wrong?"

"Are you pregnant?" The guilty look on her face gave her away. " You are. You are pregnant and trying to pass the baby off as Eddie's. Chloe, that is my baby. "

**Haha...yep that's where I am ending this part. But at least you know it's not Eddie's baby. **


	14. Chapter 8 Part 2

**AN: Hey guys! So I know that this is super late and super choice and only one POV. There are some reason for that. The next chapter will be the same...only it will be Ian's POV. I needed to give him a whole chapter for himself so that things could be explained. Plus you guys ( err...girls) have been waiting so patiently for this update. I wanted to get it up. I had some internet connectivity issues but hopefully they are fixed now. **

**I am not feeling so great about this chapter but it needs to be here so ...I give you Chapter 8 part 2, which has not been edited so please excuse grammer and punctuation errors. **

An hour after she first disappeared down the hallway, I still hadn't heard a peep out of Loren. My shock at her abrupt departure was short lived and quickly followed by anger. I was beyond tired of this back and forth between the two of us. I don't know what changed from the time we talked, and kissed, earlier tonight but I wasn't damaged enough to believe that Loren wasn't feeling the same things that I was. I knew she was. I saw it in her eyes and felt it in her kisses.

But yet again she was pulling away from me. She had promised that she wouldn't do it anymore. I should have known that she would. Not that Loren was the type of girl to play games because I know that she isn't. But our situation is difficult. More than difficult really. Downright unfair would be a better description of the mess that was between the two of us. The feelings were there but the complications were so completely crazy sometimes he didn't understand them.

Chloe was no longer an obstacle. Not that I ever really considered her one. My relationship with her, at least since I woke up in that hospital bed, was one of normality rather than want. I needed something in my life to be the same. When Chloe was with me, I felt like the guy I remembered. The guy I thought I was supposed to be. But it was an illusion. Things never felt right with Chloe. Something was between us, not just her lies. My heart wasn't in the relationship anymore. Maybe it never really was. Even before the accident, before the time I can remember of my life, I didn't need Chloe near me all the time. I need Loren near me all the time.

Even before she came home. She was always on my mind. At first it was all about me wondering why she distanced herself from slowly it became everything about her. The way that she always smelled like vanilla or coconut. The way her eyes sparkled brightly when she laughed or how she liked to talk with her hands. It was the little things that her special to him. More special than he could admit before but had no trouble doing so now. Now, he had no problem admitting that Loren Tate had not only gotten into his skin but his heart as well.

The front door opened and closed as Veronica leaned against it with a sigh. Eddie chuckled, " So that was a really long walk to the car." He couldn't resist teasing her. He really had come to think of her as a friend thanks to the numberous times Loren ran off to avoid me and Veronica was stuck having to make small talk with me.

She didn't bother to even blush as she made her way to where I was still parked in the livingroom and collasped on the chair next to me with a contented sigh. " Best walk to the car ever. " Veronica ammended with a dreamy expression. " Logan said to remind you that he will call you about hanging out. "

I nodded. That was definitely something that I was looking forward to. Logan and I weren't exactly what I would call friends but he had hung out when I worked with his father and when all the media news broke about Aaron's dirty deeds, his son had crossed my mind numberous times. I should have put the pieces together earlier when Veronica and I had talked about her past but my head wasn't really there completely I guess because it went right over me. But now that I know the situation, I kind of feel like Veronica and Logan are some sort of inspiration. They have overcome so much in just one night. Granted I didn't know everything that had gone down between them but the fact that Veronica was as hurt as she had been earlier and as happy as she is right now, gave me hope. " I guess Loren is forgiven?"

She nodded, " yes but I am gonna make her sweat a little. She shouldn't have gone behind my back but I do get why she did it. She was right about me needing to see me. Even if she is seriously hypocritical."

" Because of the situation between her and I?"

She nodded, " Loren has the best heart of anyone that I have ever met but she is so scared to have it broken that she locks it up tight. I understand that to an extent because I am, well was, the same way. It took Logan a really long time to break down my walls but when he finally did and I let him in completely, I have never been able to get him out. Loren can't do that."

" What do you mean?"

Veronica leaned forward in her chair, " I don't know how the two of you were together before your accident. All I know is what I have been told from Loren, Nora, and Melissa. And as much as I believe that Loren's feelings for you were real, I think that she held some of herself back from you. She was scared that it was all too good to be true and that you would hurt her."

I ran my hand through my hair. I had hurt her. Whether I had meant to or not, the fact remained that I hurt her. " I never meant to cause her any pain."

" I know that. She knows that . But that fear is always there for her. And I don't think that it's just you she is afraid of. Loren thinks that in a split second all the good things in her life could just be ripped away."

That is what I didn't really undestand. Loren had worked for everything that was good in her life. She deserved the life she lived, aside from the situation between the two of us. So i couldn't understand why she was so afraid to lose it all.

Veronica sighed. " This is not my place. But I hate Loren being so torn apart all the time. And since she did interfer in my life, I owe this to her. Eddie, her dad bailed on her and Nora when she was really little. He just walked out the door and never looked back. No child support, no birthday presents or christmas cards. Nothing. Because of that Loren has always felt not good enough. She loved that man more than anything and he let her down and broke her heart. Her fear stems from that. "

My anger was hard to hide as I sat there listening to Veronica talk about Loren's dead beat of a father. It boggled my mind that anyone could willingly walk away from their wife and kid, especially Nora and Loren. They had to be two of the nicest people that Eddie had ever met in his life. But he understood now why Loren kept him at arm's length especially given the fact that he himself had already broken her heart, even if it was because of the accident, he had still done it.

" Where is Loren?"

It was me that sighed this time. " In her room. Hiding from me."

Veronica shook her head, clearly not surprised. " What happened? I thought things were better between the two of you? "

"So did I. But after her talk with Chloe she sort of shut down on me again." It was frustrating as hell. I feel like I am contantly two steps forward three steps back when it comes to Loren. I can't make her fully trust me or what I feel for her. " Now she's holed up in there and I have no idea what to do to make her talk to me. "

Veronica rolled her eyes and stood up. " You make her talk to you, Eddie. You show her that no matter what is going on in that head of hers that you are here and you are not going anywhere. Am I right in thinking that you broke up with Chloe tonight because you want to be with Loren?"

" That wasn't the only reason but it was one of them." The biggest of all the reasons was that I didn't love Chloe anymore. Not the way that I should. I would probably always care about her but it wasn't enough to build a relationship on. Especially not when Loren occupied my mind so often.

"Ok well then I am trusting you to have nothing but pure and good intentions when it comes to Loren. Because despite our little disagreement, she is my very best friend in this world and I will not let you hurt her, Rock Star. Mel and I will personally hunt you down. Am I clear?"

It was cute the way that the petite little blonde tried to be so menicing. But I understood and I appreciated her love and concern for Loren. " I will never purposefully hurt her, Veronica. I care about her. I don't think that even I understand how much she means to me. "

"Ok, well then follow me." Veronica made her way down the hallway with me and my wheelchair close behind her. She stopped at Loren's door and turned the knob. It was locked so she knocked. " Hey Lo, it's me. " She motioned for me to be quiet and so I did as the door to the room opened and I came face to face with Loren's red rimmed eyes. She had been crying. My heart ached at the sight of her. " Can you just come here for a second?" Veronica asked and before Loren knew what was happening, she stepped out in the hallway and as her eyes met mine, Veronica slide past her and pushed her the rest of the way into the hallway. " Ok, goodnight." She said perkily as she slammed Loren's bedroom door closed and we could hear as she twisted the lock.

Loren glared at me, "Really?"

I held me hands up in mock defense, " that was all her. She told me to follow and I did, but her ninja like moves were all Veronica." I was amused by the little blonde but Loren definitely wasn't in the mood for amusement if the look in her eyes was any indication. She was hurting over something and more than anything I want her to be able to talk to me about it. Especially if it concerned the two of us. "Loren. What's wrong?"

She turned away from me and towards her closed bedroom door. "Nothing. I'm tired and I want to go to sleep but it looks like I am stuck on the couch tonight."

"No." He wheeled myself closer to her and took her hand, " Come on." She didn't protest and followed as I led us to my own room. I went in first and thought for a moment that she wouldn't follow. " Loren, you can sleep in here. I will sleep on the couch. It's no big deal. I want you to be comfortable." And she did look that in her too adorable for works pajamas which consisted of a pair of boxer shorts with lilttle butterflies on them and a matching tanktop. Adorably beautiful and perfect.

" I don't really mind sleeping on the couch, Eddie. "

"But I mind you sleeping there. Stay in here. I will go out there. " I wheeled myself over to the closet and pulled out the extra pillows and blankets that I kept there and placed them in my lap. When I turned myself back around, Loren was sitting on the edge of my bed crying. I dumped the linens on the floor and moved closer to her. I was directly in front of her when I took her hands in mine. " Please tell me what is wrong."

She shook her head, " I can't. "

I was done with this. I just couldn't do this anymore. " Loren, you need to listen to me, okay. You can tell me anything. I know that I hurt you before. Whether I meant to do it or not, the fact that I can't remember you and us broke your heart. I hate myself for that. " I let go of one of her hands and cupped her cheek using my thumb to wipe away some of her tears that were still falling. " I know that things between us will never be the same as they were before, but maybe they can be better."

"What do you mean?"

It was time to lay it all out for her. Time to make her understand that memories or not, she was who I wanted and a life with her was what I wanted. "I mean that I want to be with you Loren. I want us to be a couple. I can't stop thinking about you when we aren't together and when we are together all I want to do is touch you and kiss you. " I didn't give her a chance to respond before I leaned up and kissed her. It took her less than a second to respond and get into the kiss.

After a few minutes I broke the kiss and pulled back, " I will never get tired of kissing you. " I leaned in for one last taste and that sat back in my chair. " I don't know why you are so upset but I want you to know that you can talk to me about anything. I am here for you Loren."

" I just wish that you had never gotten angry and driven off. I wish that you had never stopped at that gas station. I wish that you could remember everything. "

Now was the time. " I remembered something earlier. Something about you?"

Her eyes light up and for the first time since she came in from her little chat with Chloe, she smiled a true geniune smile. "Really?"

I nodded. " I was talking about you with my dad. After my birthday dinner?" I wasn't completely sure about all the details of my birthday but that much I got. " We went for a drive. "

She smiled, " and then you took me home and walked me to my door. And then you kissed me."

" That was our first kiss." I didn't phrase it as a question because I already knew the answer. I kissed her that night, on my birthday, because I wanted to. Because she had changed my life. "Tell me about that night."

She smiled again. " You called me earlier that day to come to your place to write with you. I was so nervous, you always make me so nervous. We talked more than we actually wrote any music though. That always seemed to happen. Mostly we talked about Chloe. You were thinking about taking her back. Even asked me if I thought you should. Then your dad showed up and you guys invited my mom and I to go to Rumour with you. It took some convincing but I talked her into it. " She laughed a little and I did the same. " That night, I think was the beginning of our parents crushing on each other." She tucked a lock of hair behind her ear and continued. " That night was the beginning of a lot of things."

"Like what?" I hoped that she would open up to me and tell me all about that night, tell me about our drive, and our kiss. But I didn't let my hopes soar to high because Loren seemed to be the Queen of Avoidance when it comes to me.

She shrugged her shoulders, " Like I realized that my feelings for you went way beyond a silly crush on my favorite singer. " She looked towards the window, obviously embarrassed by her admission. "I think that you really opened your eyes to the real Chloe that night too. She showed up at Rumour and was not happy to see you there with me. She caused a scene, spilled a drink all over me and everything, but you didn't let her get to you. You stuck by your decision that it was over. Also that night, you told me how much faith you had in me. That meant so much more to me than I could ever express to you. Then or now. "

"And the kiss?"

She smiled again but didn't turn back to face me. " The kiss was amazingly unexpected and wonderful."

"Did it make you happy?" I needed to know that I made her happy. I needed to hear the words.

Again she nodded, " It really did. " She turned back to me now and her eyes were sparkling with unshed tears but these tear were happy. "It was really no secret to anyone that I had a crush on you. From the second that I officially met you, I looked forward to the next time I would see you. It was patethic really. Here I was a silly high school senior drooling over an internation rock star, but that night, everything was different. You ddin't see me as just some girl who liked you. You said all the right things and you were so sweet and gentle. Romantic."

" I wish I could remember the kiss, the conversation, any of it." It was frustrating that such an important part of my life was just gone. A huge turning point in my friendship with Loren was just wiped out. It wasn't fair. " I'm sorry."

Loren looked at me with sharp eyes. " Sorry for what? You didn't ask for what happened to you, Eddie."

"And neither did you. Yet here we are. We are in the same room. We want the same thing, yet you are pulling away from me again." I didn't mean to sound angry but I knew that I did. I was angry. " I don't understand, Loren. I though that you were feeling what I was feeling. Do you not understand that me ending things with Chloe, means that..."

She didn't let me finish before she blurted out the worst thing I ever imagined was possible. " Chloe is pregnant, Eddie."


End file.
